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Help me communicate, please


LadyG

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OK,

I did not sell my flat and buy a boat on order to satisfy some dream of 'living on a boat'

I did it 'cos I have been a semi pro sailor for years, and I want to travel within the Uk, absorbing history and suchlike.

The way it worked out I wasted a year in some ghastly marina in Goole, , then got locked down  but eventually I got travelling, then got locked down, then moved, then got locked in and on and on.

I had to call on brother to get some diesel, he insists on coming tomorrow , a day which I was going to do other things, things which included visiting local museum  and  he says Iwill help you with fuel, and food, etc etc, but forget the museum.

This is two years in to the 'living on a boat', and he can't seem to understand, I am not interested in living on a boat, the boat is a tool.

I'm just going to go along with it, say no more, but am I the only person who lives on a boat but it's a roof over my head, a home without a postcode?

 

 

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1 minute ago, LadyG said:

OK,

I did not sell my flat and buy a boat on order to satisfy some dream of 'living on a boat'

I did ir 'cos aI have been a semi pro sailor for years, and I want to travel within the Uk, absorbing history and suchlike.

The way it worked out I wasted a year in some ghastly marina in Goole, , then got locked down  but eventually I got travelling, then got locked down, then moved, then got locked in and on and on.

I had to call on brother to get some diesel, he insists on coming tomorrow , a day which I was going to do other things, things which included visiting local museum  and  he says Iwill help you with fuel, and food, etc etc, but forget the museum.

This is two years in to the 'living on a boat', and he can't seem to understand, I am not interested in living on a boat, the boat is a tool.

I'm just going to go along with it, say no more, but am I the only person who lives on a boat but it's a roof over my head, a home without a postcode.l

 

Sounds like you need to start a vlog ...

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1 minute ago, LadyG said:

 

This is two years in to the 'living on a boat', and he can't seem to understand, I am not interested in living on a boat, the boat is a tool.

I'm just going to go along with it, say no more, but am I the only person who lives on a boat but it's a roof over my head, a home without a postcode.l

 

It was at the very beginning, maybe the first 2/3 weeks but I soon realized I love it, even with all the various hassles of boat life it is where I want to be

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I think we are all different. we live on a boat quite simply as its nicer in so many but not all ways than a house. More to the point swmbo says she doesnt want to move back into a house as she loves the boat life, it will have to come soonish though me thinks.

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20 minutes ago, tree monkey said:

It was at the very beginning, maybe the first 2/3 weeks but I soon realized I love it, even with all the various hassles of boat life it is where I want to be

I'm not bothered, I am , or would be, happy enough on the boat, and obviously I have spent a lot of time and money making it comfortable, but it's like a car, it's transient,.

I've owned houses and they were all better than rented accomodation, but none were 'dream houses'

I accept the hassles of boating, though they have been magnified beyond toleration.

But  what I am unable to communicate to anyone, particularly brother in this instance, is that it is very important that my recreation, my interests include wandering about the towns and the villages, and particularly the local museums.This Covid thing is making everything very difficult, and it goes on and on.........

Re boats, . I've been there,done that and got the T shirt with boats.

It's very difficult to explain, but it seems that difficulties are constantly put in my way, eg, I was understanding that diesel would be available at West Stockwith, now it seems I am the only person who does not know there is no diesel on this canal, none at all. Yet there are several dozen boats within a mile. I have been communicating with lock keepers and with CRT, but none of them mentioned the fact there is no diesel on this canal, in spite of published info to the contrary.

Edited by LadyG
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21 minutes ago, Athy said:

Jo, if the marina was ghastly, why did you stay there for a whole year - and was it really as long as that?

I paid for 12 months as I thought I would get help to sort the boat out,  but it turned out my neighbour was a pshychopath.

The first month or so, there was no smell of dead bodies from the nearby landfill site, and I was busy with painting and so on. Also brother who is my only family was totally against me being a person with no postcode, he still is. I tried to keep him onside, and that was something he very much wanted. The marina had a postcode.

Edited by LadyG
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I moved on to mine when my marriage disintegrated, as quite a lot of people seem to! It was intended as a leisure thing, it's teally too small to live on. Wound up on it for two years and loved it, but it's not practical for a working musician with a book addiction. And I found the winter long dark hours hard, as the boat really wasn't set up for it. So I empathise with you - it's the external constraints that make it hard.

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35 minutes ago, Arthur Marshall said:

I moved on to mine when my marriage disintegrated, as quite a lot of people seem to! It was intended as a leisure thing, it's teally too small to live on. Wound up on it for two years and loved it, but it's not practical for a working musician with a book addiction. And I found the winter long dark hours hard, as the boat really wasn't set up for it. So I empathise with you - it's the external constraints that make it hard.

I've moved on to my boat in order to travel, rather than boat. The first year was in a ghastly marina, I am not a marina person, but I needed a few months to chill, and a few months to sort the boat.

Then I was locked down, then I went on to the Chesterfield and got locked in, twice! Other problems.

Now , everything is closed or not normal,  places I intended to visit are closed, so instead of pottering along on my boat, I seem to spend most of my tine sorting the boat, getting fuel, getting diesel, getting food, getting from a to b, all seem to be major problems.

The boat itself has taken ages to make safe and comfortable, and I don't mind long dark nights, in fact my on boat hobbies include painting, and so far I have only done one sketch. 

Anyway, I am perfectly happy on my boat, it's warm and dry and self contained, but it has been a nightmare trying to sort things out while tryong to live normally.

 

 

Edited by LadyG
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28 minutes ago, LadyG said:

 

Anyway, I am perfectly happy on my boat, it's warm and dry and self contained, but it has been a nightmare trying to sort things out while tryong to live normally.

 

 

 

Welcome to life onboard. Yes a lot of the time is spent simply trying to make it liveable and then maintain that situation.

Edited by blackrose
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24 minutes ago, LadyG said:

I've moved on to my boat in order to travel, rather than boat. The first year was in a ghastly marina, I am not a marina person, but I needed a few months to chill, and a few months to sort the boat.

Then I was locked down, then I went on to the Chesterfield snd got locked in, twice!

Now , everything is closed or not normal,  places I intended to visit are closed, so instead of pottering along on my boat, I seem to spend most of my tine sorting the boat, getting fuel, getting deisel, getting food, getting from a to b, all seem to be major problems.

 

 

Actually, what you describe seems pretty normal and although we only manage about 25% of our time on board (rest in bricks, mortar and timber frame) it is that all-consuming nature that is attractive. Folk often say, how relaxing it must be, but we find that there is never enough time but we do tend to forget about the things we came to escape, at least for a short while! Oh, and what about those pesky locks and swing/lift bridges that keep getting in the way!

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7 minutes ago, blackrose said:

 

Welcome to life onboard. Yes a lot of the time it's spent simply trying to make it liveable and then maintain that situation.

I've realise that, what  I am trying to get over, is ...."it's not about the boatP

6 minutes ago, Mike Todd said:

Actually, what you describe seems pretty normal and although we only manage about 25% of our time on board (rest in bricks, mortar and timber frame) it is that all-consuming nature that is attractive. Folk often say, how relaxing it must be, but we find that there is never enough time but we do tend to forget about the things we came to escape, at least for a short while! Oh, and what about those pesky locks and swing/lift bridges that keep getting in the way!

Omg, swing bridges singlehanded, those sunny summer days...

If you spend 25percent of your time on board doing stuff, and I do the same amount of stuff, thhat should leave me free of boat things seventy five percent of the time.

Unfortunately, there is nothing else to do, here,  one pub is closed, the other has more staff than customers, and it's £20 for a meal , and a drink, that's OK for a treat, but not every day.

 

 

 

Edited by LadyG
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1 hour ago, LadyG said:

OK,

I did not sell my flat and buy a boat on order to satisfy some dream of 'living on a boat'

I did it 'cos I have been a semi pro sailor for years, and I want to travel within the Uk, absorbing history and suchlike.

The way it worked out I wasted a year in some ghastly marina in Goole, , then got locked down  but eventually I got travelling, then got locked down, then moved, then got locked in and on and on.

I had to call on brother to get some diesel, he insists on coming tomorrow , a day which I was going to do other things, things which included visiting local museum  and  he says Iwill help you with fuel, and food, etc etc, but forget the museum.

This is two years in to the 'living on a boat', and he can't seem to understand, I am not interested in living on a boat, the boat is a tool.

I'm just going to go along with it, say no more, but am I the only person who lives on a boat but it's a roof over my head, a home without a postcode?

 

 

 

There are plenty of people living in ghastly marinas and we've all been locked down haven't we? The whole country is going though this, it's not just you.

 

You know your brother better than us but from what you say it doesn't sound like a communication issue that you have. More an issue of understanding and consideration for others. If you're asking other people to help you perhaps you need to fit in with their busy schedules without feeling aggrieved about it? 

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We always used to say you live in a house and on a boat.

You are on and off doing jobs fixing things working on the things that in a house come down or out of with pipes and wires.

We are currently in a house temp or perm don’t know, and in England temp or perm don’t know , thanks to covid.

In the house we don’t empty loos and ashpans, fill with water stoke fires, charge batteries, and  we shop once every three/ four weeks.
It’s a different life. I end up looking for jobs to do.

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Having briefly done both sailing and narrow boating  I would say the two  have similarities but both are only as good as the surroundings . 

I prefer my motorboat to narrow boats  and the chief officer doesn't like sailing. Its good we don't all want the same thing.

 

Why on earth did you pick Goole in the first place  . Its a dump . Probably  you picked it due to the price?

 

There are much worse places to be than the  Chesterfield canal  at the Misterton/West Stockwith area but it is isolated from the rest of the canals. 

 

If you are not bothered about boats why not sell it . You must know that sailing / boating is something you are passionate about or not. There doe sent seem to me  a halfway house .

 

Boats asking the right money are selling fast recently . A nice little house  and nice little car or perhaps   a nice little camper-van would cost less and get you wherever you want to go.

 

 

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Quote

he can't seem to understand, I am not interested in living on a boat, the boat is a tool.

Love that.  We want to buy a boat and cruise the canals so we can see/experience England for a couple of years or more.  Same with owning a camper/caravan. It is a means to allow us to travel and see new places. It is not about the camper.

 

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We are all different thank goodness. For me it’s about the boat and the boating.

Boating can be hard because we have an old boat, and I have some work related physical problems.  I could easily sell the boat and buy the best modern boat around, but it wouldn’t be the same, there is something about the whole package  that makes it very satisfying.

However when you have banged another hole in your skin on a sticking out lump. in the damp engine room, and you are getting a free condensation shower whilst sitting on the loo you do consider the dark side.

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2 hours ago, stablemabel said:

You never get bored on a boat...you havent the time

I  think some people would be bored very quickly.

 

In our first year with our first boat we  went from Farndon to York via  Trent falls and returned the S Yorks navigations and Selby canal . A friend asked how long the journey would take and when we said we were in no rush and it would take several days to get there and about a week to get back he couldn't understand why anyone would want do that.

I loved every moment of it.

A dozen years later still enjoy every boat trip, every weekend away , every holiday, even every day we are on the boat in the marina and even enjoy doing maintenance jobs.

I suspect people who say the boat is just a tool are not going to be in it for the  longer term.

 

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3 hours ago, blackrose said:

 

There are plenty of people living in ghastly marinas and we've all been locked down haven't we? The whole country is going though this, it's not just you.

 

You know your brother better than us but from what you say it doesn't sound like a communication issue that you have. More an issue of understanding and consideration for others. If you're asking other people to help you perhaps you need to fit in with their busy schedules without feeling aggrieved about it? 

He is retired, and volunteers to come and help me, he does not have a busy schedule. He won't come after Thursday due to his belief it is illegal, but he does not think it is illegal tomorow, but he thought it was illegal last time he came, which was two weeks ago. This is the first time I have actually asked him to come, otherwise I would have great difficulty getting sorted, while it is easy enough for him.

Edited by LadyG
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6 minutes ago, MartynG said:

I suspect people who say the boat is just a tool are not going to be in it for the  longer term.

I reckon you are correct - the boat is part of the 'round' of boating, be it mending it, driving it, or sleeping in it. It is all part of the boating experience.

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15 minutes ago, MartynG said:

I  think some people would be bored very quickly.

 

In our first year with our first boat we  went from Farndon to York via  Trent falls and returned the S Yorks navigations and Selby canal . A friend asked how long the journey would take and when we said we were in no rush and it would take several days to get there and about a week to get back he couldn't understand why anyone would want do that.

I loved every moment of it.

A dozen years later still enjoy every boat trip, every weekend away , every holiday, even every day we are on the boat in the marina and even enjoy doing maintenance jobs.

I suspect people who say the boat is just a tool are not going to be in it for the  longer term.

 

I am living on the boat, not living for boating,. It's just a roof over my head, I thought I made that clear that was what the thread was about. I'll keep the boat for a few years, it does not have to be 'forevet'

Edited by LadyG
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18 minutes ago, LadyG said:

I am living on the boat, not living for boating,.

That may be part of the problem you are having adjusting to boat life.

 

If your interest is in travel, history & visiting landmarks you may find that a camper van would suit you better. 

Plenty of places to get diesel, eat and empty the toilet.

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4 minutes ago, Alan de Enfield said:

That may be part of the problem you are having adjusting to boat life.

 

If your interest is in travel, history & visiting landmarks you may find that a camper van would suit you better. 

Plenty of places to get diesel, eat and empty the toilet.

Not to forget fewer "stoppages" and a diversion when a route is totally blocked.

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