I had to laugh..

[Gazboatman]

.

Edited August 28, 2013 by Gazboatman

[mrsmelly]

Keep taking the tablets...............

 

Tim

[Starcoaster]

FUNNIEST DOT EVER!

[Gazboatman]

Sorry not sure what happened there...

 

Anyway..

 

Today I was halfway up a flight of locks. I'm stood on the back deck of my boat closed in a lock and rising, and a lady approaches me, windlass in hand.

 

"Excuse me" she says, "are you going up, or coming down?"

 

Made me laugh anyway.

[Starcoaster]

Ha, we've had that when we waited for a boat to catch up to us to share a double lock. All of the steering/working crew got what was happening but the rather elderly guy with them thanked us for waiting and then checked (while we were in the empty lock with the gates open for them) if we were going up or down!

[Neil2]

Reminds me of that Steven Wright line about how he liked to go to department stores and put a slinky on the going up escalator.

[Gazboatman]

Ha, we've had that when we waited for a boat to catch up to us to share a double lock. All of the steering/working crew got what was happening but the rather elderly guy with them thanked us for waiting and then checked (while we were in the empty lock with the gates open for them) if we were going up or down!

Maybe she thought I fancied a challenge and decided to do the flight in reverse?

 

[NB Lola]

I did reverse up one of the Hillmortons once, but that's another story!

[Dalslandia]

Had a blonde female lockkeeper at an electric operated single lock, that the first day we did go up, she didn't open the gate fully but left it open 8 inch, she said the older male lock keeper had said she can not open the gate full because the fuses will blow, He had said she have to let go on the button when fully open! (The gear box have a slip clutch) I explaned the boat can not pass if not fully open.

 

The next day when we did go down, she closed the paddels before we was fully down, because she was afraid if she let to much water out of the lock we might be standing on the bottom, how she thought that she could get less water in the lock then in the lake down stream of the lock I don't know. I had to explane she can not open the gate if there is 2-4 inch more water in the lock then outside it.

[system 4-50]

My funniest recent event was watching somebody trying to get their boat into an open (narrow) lock after getting the bow just into the mouth of the lock and the rest of the boat at a big angle to it. The only tool being used to achieve this was the bow thruster!

After I had watched this for some time, I observed to the spouse watching on the bank that the bow thruster must have big batteries, and the reply came back, "Oh no, it's hydraulic".

 

Edited to add "narrow" to be more precise.

Edited August 29, 2013 by system 4-50

[Guest]

Of course if doing the C&H in a longish boat this could be a valid question.....

[suziq]

One day at Stoke Bruerne when we were moored near the tunnel a couple of elderly ladies came past and asked whether the tunnel went all the way through. My partner replied "no you go halfway in and there is a cavern where there are a couple of shops and a cafe". They actually believed him!

[mattlad]

I've had someone ask me the same question when I've been using a lock. I felt like giving a really sarky answer...... But in the heat of the moment I couldn't think of one.

 

I've also had a chap who was convinced that my engine (an RN) was a Royal Navy engine! I tried explaining but in the end I gave up and just agreed with him.....

[sueb]

Some smart gent at Stoke Bruerne told his dolly bird - you have to be wealthy to own one of those! He was looking at us and our boat

[luctor et emergo]

Some smart gent at Stoke Bruerne told his dolly bird - you have to be wealthy to own one of those! He was looking at us and our boat

Having met you, I can see why he thought so.

 

 

 

(Only joking. Knackered Navvy was well looked after, but not a shiney boat. Abi did enjoy her ride into the lock though, and the drink. )

[Guest]

One day at Stoke Bruerne when we were moored near the tunnel a couple of elderly ladies came past and asked whether the tunnel went all the way through. My partner replied "no you go halfway in and there is a cavern where there are a couple of shops and a cafe". They actually believed him!

To be fair, I would have believed that.

[KevMc]

One day at Stoke Bruerne when we were moored near the tunnel a couple of elderly ladies came past and asked whether the tunnel went all the way through. My partner replied "no you go halfway in and there is a cavern where there are a couple of shops and a cafe". They actually believed him!

Isn't there a tunnel somewhere where there is a 'cavern' - seem to recall watching a tv prog about them doing a wedding in it - or am I imagining it?

[john6767]

Isn't there a tunnel somewhere where there is a 'cavern' - seem to recall watching a tv prog about them doing a wedding in it - or am I imagining it?

Dudley Tunnel.

[Gazboatman]

Another one, I'm cruising past some young kids fishing, when they start throwing their arms around to get my attention. Pointing at the bilge outlet, witch is pumping water out..

 

"Ere Mr, your boats leaking"

 

[Captain Fizz]

Another one, I'm cruising past some young kids fishing, when they start throwing their arms around to get my attention. Pointing at the bilge outlet, witch is pumping water out..

 

"Ere Mr, your boats leaking"

 

 

 

 

They were right though, otherwise the bilge pump would not be running.

[Keeping Up]

From being moored in Stratford Basin, I was in a position that made it easier to go down the lock on to the river backwards. As I did so, one of the tourists on the bridge asked me if I was going up or down the lock. I just answered "yes I am"

[Athy]

I was at theRising Sun in Shackerstone a couple of weeks ago on the evening that the steam boys took their vehicles to the pub. The lane was completely blocked by marvellous traction engines and steam rollers, so that any traffic had to go round the village to avoid the blockage.

At last a steam roller man drank up and trundled off, leaving a gap wide enough for cars to get through. Enter a Hooray driving a white drop-top BMW which he fairly hurled into said gap. A moment later there was a screech of brakes, as a 4" to the foot scale traction engine, with its driver on a wagon behind it, emerged from the car park. It proceeded along the lane at a creditable 3 mph or so, with Mr. Hooray becoming incandescent as as he forced to follow it at the same speed. Oh, how we tittered, enhancing his discomfiture.

 

(Disclaimer: other makes of cars suitable for driving by arrogant people are available; it's just that Beamers seem to fit the bill so well).