Say hello

[Theo60]

Guys if you see me walking along the canal between locks 69 malkins bank and moston walking my doberman please say hi 

[Tony1]

 

I might be passing that way in a couple of months Theo, so if I do see yourself and the doberman I will certainly say hi. 

I may be a sombre mood, because I'll be heading for a stretch of canal that has I think 8,250 double locks, and I'll be singlehanding. Canalplan estimates it will take me 18 months to reach Stoke.

 

[Alan de Enfield]

3 minutes ago, Tony1 said:

 

I might be passing that way in a couple of months Theo, so if I do see yourself and the doberman I will certainly say hi. 

I may be a sombre mood, because I'll be heading for a stretch of canal that has I think 8,250 double locks, and I'll be singlehanding. Canalplan estimates it will take me 18 months to reach Stoke.

 

 

I have found that Canal plan is always quite optimistic, I don't think it has been programmed to take into account the poor levels of Maintenance since 2012, or, the fact the bottom of the canal is so close to the top.

[MtB]

1 minute ago, Tony1 said:

 

I might be passing that way in a couple of months Theo, so if I do see yourself and the doberman I will certainly say hi. 

I may be a sombre mood, because I'll be heading for a stretch of canal that has I think 8,250 double locks, and I'll be singlehanding. Canalplan estimates it will take me 18 months to reach Stoke.

 

 

Don't exaggerate, it will be fine! I'm sure a team of vollys will turn up to stand around, watch you do them and occasionally open a paddle unexpectedly and slightly before you were ready...

 

 

[Tracy D'arth]

16 hours ago, Theo60 said:

Guys if you see me walking along the canal between locks 69 malkins bank and moston walking my doberman please say hi 

Are gals allowed to say hi too?

[David Mack]

5 minutes ago, Alan de Enfield said:

 

I have found that Canal plan is always quite optimistic, I don't think it has been programmed to take into account the poor levels of Maintenance since 2012, or, the fact the bottom of the canal is so close to the top.

Canalplan has default speed/time settings for different types of canal and lock. You can change these to personal values which better represent your boating experience, then save these values for future journey planning.

[Tony1]

5 minutes ago, MtB said:

 

Don't exaggerate, it will be fine! I'm sure a team of vollys will turn up to stand around, watch you do them and occasionally open a paddle unexpectedly and slightly before you were ready...

 

 

 

My usual technique in the summer months is to wait for a passing hire boat with at least 7 hearty-looking crew, and explain with my best sad puppy face that I'm singlehanding, and I don't suppose I could possibly join them going through the locks..?

They are usually only too glad to help out. In fact I offer to come up a lock ladder and help, and I have to pretend to be disappointed when they tell me to stay on my boat throughout the whole thing.

I find its generally best to avoid those boats with only two crew, or those who look a bit elderly.

These workshy rascals expect me to actually get off the boat and do some work myself. 

 

 

[Alan de Enfield]

8 minutes ago, David Mack said:

Canalplan has default speed/time settings for different types of canal and lock. You can change these to personal values which better represent your boating experience, then save these values for future journey planning.

 

It was tongue in cheek in response to his proposed "18 month, 8250 lock trip to Stoke"

[MtB]

1 minute ago, Tony1 said:

 

My usual technique in the summer months is to wait for a passing hire boat with at least 7 hearty-looking crew, and explain with my best sad puppy face that I'm singlehanding, and I don't suppose I could possibly join them going through the locks..?

They are usually only too glad to help out. In fact I offer to come up a lock ladder and help, and I have to pretend to be disappointed when they tell me to stay on my boat throughout the whole thing.

I find its generally best to avoid those boats with only two crew, or those who look a bit elderly.

These workshy rascals expect me to actually get off the boat and do some work myself. 

 

 

Lol I've had that myself. I agree, best to avoid those lazy buggers who expect one to actually HELP.

 

With the first category, always make sure they enter the lock first as being hirers and flushed with enthusiasm their steering skills are sometimes a little bit lacking and the bounce off your boat if you went in first. Though I have to say, the old and doddery boaters sometimes demonstrate this exact same trait and if you object you get the "I've been boating for 50 years and I always do it like that" kinda line.

[David Mack]

16 minutes ago, Tony1 said:

 

My usual technique in the summer months is to wait for a passing hire boat with at least 7 hearty-looking crew, and explain with my best sad puppy face that I'm singlehanding, and I don't suppose I could possibly join them going through the locks..?

Doesn't always work. Setting off down Tardebigge a few years back we caught up with a hire boat with about 8 rugby club types - beefy lads in their 20s and 30s. They hadn't a clue. When their lock was empty they exited the lock, closed the bottom gates then all of them climbed aboard to motor to the next lock, less than 100 yards away (which was empty), only to get off again and start to fill the lock. Although there were only two of us I ended up going ahead to fill locks for them and open top gates, so as to (slightly) speed our own passage. But they still didn't take the hint!

Fortunately they pulled in after 3 or 4 locks and we were able to pass them.

Edited June 30, 2022 by David Mack

[Tony1]

1 hour ago, MtB said:

 

 

Lol I've had that myself. I agree, best to avoid those lazy buggers who expect one to actually HELP.

 

With the first category, always make sure they enter the lock first as being hirers and flushed with enthusiasm their steering skills are sometimes a little bit lacking and the bounce off your boat if you went in first. Though I have to say, the old and doddery boaters sometimes demonstrate this exact same trait and if you object you get the "I've been boating for 50 years and I always do it like that" kinda line.

 

Sadly the quality of the manual labour provided by hire boats is very variable. 

I pride myself that I can spot a fellow incompetent a mile away, and as you say these creatures are to be avoided at all costs. 

That said, I have spent a few pleasant afternoons on the Llangollen chatting to lovely couples and their children at locks- none of whom had the slightest clue what to do with their windlasses. It was actually quite rewarding to act the part of the salty old sea dog, and supervise the team's efforts. 

 

But on a rainy, muddy Autumn afternoon with another half dozen double locks ahead, life takes on a more grim aspect, and one can't afford to be too picky.

Obviously one hopes to meet one of those super-enthusiastic crews who have a teenager deployed to each paddle even before you're into the lock.

But the species more commonly encountered is the grizzled and veteran married couple. These unfortunates are almost as reluctant as I am, if such a thing can be conceived, and they husband their manual labour jealously. 

Unless I am at the top of my acting game and appear spectacularly sad and pathetic, or I can feign some sort of minor injury, these villains will insist on me matching their labours turn for turn at every paddle. 

Its just a shame CRT don't have some sort of system where I could report lazy boaters for making me work at locks.  

I wouldn't insist on prison sentences for them. 

Not for a first offence. 

 

 

Edited June 30, 2022 by Tony1

[LadyG]

I was idly watching a first time hirer leaving the dock , straight in to the wall ahead, the guy from the hire company took over and got them through the bridge hole where he departed.

They then set off slowly, my walking pace as it happened, so at the first bend decided to go round LHS, I could see there was no oncoming and suggested by arm signals that he moved boat over, he then hugged the LHS, and set off again, LHS,  at which point I just told him he was on the wrong side. There are some basic instructions on the boat, about using locks but it does not instruct them about rule of the road.

Edited June 30, 2022 by LadyG

[Lady M]

1 hour ago, Tony1 said:

 

Sadly the quality of the manual labour provided by hire boats is very variable. 

I pride myself that I can spot a fellow incompetent a mile away, and as you say these creatures are to be avoided at all costs. 

That said, I have spent a few pleasant afternoons on the Llangollen chatting to lovely couples and their children at locks- none of whom had the slightest clue what to do with their windlasses. It was actually quite rewarding to act the part of the salty old sea dog, and supervise the team's efforts. 

 

But on a rainy, muddy Autumn afternoon with another half dozen double locks ahead, life takes on a more grim aspect, and one can't afford to be too picky.

Obviously one hopes to meet one of those super-enthusiastic crews who have a teenager deployed to each paddle even before you're into the lock.

But the species more commonly encountered is the grizzled and veteran married couple. These unfortunates are almost as reluctant as I am, if such a thing can be conceived, and they husband their manual labour jealously. 

Unless I am at the top of my acting game and appear spectacularly sad and pathetic, or I can feign some sort of minor injury, these villains will insist on me matching their labours turn for turn at every paddle. 

Its just a shame CRT don't have some sort of system where I could report lazy boaters for making me work at locks.  

I wouldn't insist on prison sentences for them. 

Not for a first offence. 

 

 

 

When I help you at a lock, I'd like you to pass the favour on to someone else in future.  

[Tony1]

23 minutes ago, Lady C said:

 

When I help you at a lock, I'd like you to pass the favour on to someone else in future.  

 

 

LadyC, I must stress that I am very much joking when I talk of avoiding elderly boaters because they don't make good lock labourers. 

I met a guy who must have been in his mid 70s on the middlewich arm last Autumn, and I asked him to stay on his boat whilst I worked us through a couple of locks. 

I am very conscious that one of these days it will be me who is borderline - in terms of being fit enough to work a boat through a lock-  and I'd like to think that I would be helped through by someone who is younger/fitter. 

That said, if the old chap had been going up the tardebigge flight with me, I'd have him working like a carthorse by the time we were 3 locks in. 

(That was joking as well)

 

[LadyG]

15 minutes ago, Tony1 said:

 

 

LadyC, I must stress that I am very much joking when I talk of avoiding elderly boaters because they don't make good lock labourers. 

I met a guy who must have been in his mid 70s on the middlewich arm last Autumn, and I asked him to stay on his boat whilst I worked us through a couple of locks. 

I am very conscious that one of these days it will be me who is borderline - in terms of being fit enough to work a boat through a lock-  and I'd like to think that I would be helped through by someone who is younger/fitter. 

That said, if the old chap had been going up the tardebigge flight with me, I'd have him working like a carthorse by the time we were 3 locks in. 

(That was joking as well)

 

I am quite shameless when it come to buddying up, never had anyone hesitate to help, and if I'm able to help others through, if I'm moored near locks, I'm  more than willing to do so, I also ask casual passers by to help me with the swing bridges, I just wait till a likely person comes along, it makes for rather slow progress, but I'm not in a hurry.

On big locks it's safer to have two boats side by side, and its very rare we are both singlehanded.

Edited June 30, 2022 by LadyG

[Captain Pegg]

3 hours ago, Alan de Enfield said:

 

It was tongue in cheek in response to his proposed "18 month, 8250 lock trip to Stoke"

Even so the CanalPlan defaults for narrow canals are realistic even for a competent single hander. 
 

The only challenging thing I find in relation to the defaults is cruising at an average of 3.25 mph on broad canals but that’s more to do with moored boats. It tends to even out with the lock timings anyway.

[Tony1]

47 minutes ago, LadyG said:

I am quite shameless when it come to buddying up,

 

I've gradually realised that one has to be prepared to divest oneself of any sense of shame regarding some common societal norms- personal appearance being a notable early casualty of boating. 

I remember climbing up the ladder out of one of the double locks between Bunbury and Tattenhall on a rainy afternoon. I carried the centre line up in one hand, already liberally coated with mud from laying around the earlier locks.

I'd had a soaking but the rain had not long stopped and the sun was putting in a rare and brief appearance, so my hair was plastered to my head and was steaming slightly.

The muddy centre line somehow slipped in my hand as I climbed the ladder, and brushed across my face, but in my attempt to hold onto it it I managed to flick some of the slime from the lock ladder onto my cheek, and I suspect into my mouth. 

I emerged over the top with a horrible grimace on my face and streaked with mud, and saw a smartly-dressed middle aged couple sitting on a bench 10 feet away, clearly taking a leisurely Sunday afternoon constitutional.

The woman looked alarmed at the mess on my face, but the man was quite composed, and asked me if I needed help. 

'Well, not physically', I answered, and began wiping my face with my sleeve, and probably making myself look even more deranged. 

The knees of my trousers were already thick with mud from kneeling down earlier, and my shirt was streaked with mud from the rope. 

But there are some times when you have to just front it out, even if you look a compete mess, pretend everything is normal, and try to raise a smile.

'At least its turned out nice though, eh?'

 

Edited June 30, 2022 by Tony1

[MrsM]

You are a super writer @Tony1 🙂

[Tony1]

10 minutes ago, MrsM said:

You are a super writer @Tony1 🙂

 

Thank you MrsM, that's very kind- although I'm just a rather ropey scribbler of course.

I do usually try to see the amusing side of events, and boating seems to offer a fair few situations that seem ripe with the possibility for hilarious mishaps. 

But there are times like when I emerged from that lock when I'm genuinely struggling for an appropriate phrase. 

I think the weather comment came later, if I'm honest.

I think we just looked at each other for a few seconds, and then I said: 'well this is unfortunate.'

 

I was chased by the homicidal resident swan just yesterday. It got between me and the boat, and then stalked towards me, so I had to back away and climb the steps out of the basin, and wait for it to make a tactical mistake before I could nip back to the boat. Obviously now I cant leave the boat without being armed with a water pistol, which in the moment doesnt even seem funny, but looking back is of course utterly ridiculous.

Not that I would tell the swan that, of course.

 

[ditchcrawler]

On 30/06/2022 at 09:30, Tony1 said:

 

I find its generally best to avoid those boats with only two crew, or those who look a bit elderly.

These workshy rascals expect me to actually get off the boat and do some work myself. 

 

 

Thats me and the misses, we always seem to end up with a single hander who doesn't own a windlass

[Tracy D'arth]

On 30/06/2022 at 14:20, Tony1 said:

 

Thank you MrsM, that's very kind- although I'm just a rather ropey scribbler of course.

I do usually try to see the amusing side of events, and boating seems to offer a fair few situations that seem ripe with the possibility for hilarious mishaps. 

But there are times like when I emerged from that lock when I'm genuinely struggling for an appropriate phrase. 

I think the weather comment came later, if I'm honest.

I think we just looked at each other for a few seconds, and then I said: 'well this is unfortunate.'

 

I was chased by the homicidal resident swan just yesterday. It got between me and the boat, and then stalked towards me, so I had to back away and climb the steps out of the basin, and wait for it to make a tactical mistake before I could nip back to the boat. Obviously now I cant leave the boat without being armed with a water pistol, which in the moment doesnt even seem funny, but looking back is of course utterly ridiculous.

Not that I would tell the swan that, of course.

 

A swan will not hurt you if you approach it with a positive attitude. It is more frightened of you than you of it.

[Tony1]

53 minutes ago, ditchcrawler said:

Thats me and the misses, we always seem to end up with a single hander who doesn't own a windlass

 

Yes, I really must get myself one of those windlass thingies. I think it would make a lovely ornament on the stern.

But Heaven forfend I should ever have to actually use the thing.

 

 

 

[beerbeerbeerbeerbeer]

1 hour ago, ditchcrawler said:

Thats me and the misses, we always seem to end up with a single hander who doesn't own a windlass

Brilliant 🤩 

I’m gonna try that one of these days. 
 

[Tony1]

29 minutes ago, Tracy D'arth said:

A swan will not hurt you if you approach it with a positive attitude. It is more frightened of you than you of it.

 

I think the swan in Ellesmere Port basin is genuinely disturbed in some way. I've never seen one so aggressive. 

I've watched many people attempt to feed it, and the swan literally bites at their hand. One of the lockkeepers told me that it injured someone a few days before I arrived.

I know of a swan having broken the arm of a man in a dinghy, but that was I think close to the young, and it was extremely protective. 

But the beast at Ellesmere Port is very unusual. I was working on the canvas cratch cover, and I didnt see it approaching.

I turned my back to the water for some reason and about a minute later I felt a bite on my calf, but fortunately it was on my wellies so I felt the bite but had no cuts. 

I tried making friends by feeding it with proper swan food, but it wasnt having any of it. 

In fairness I dont think it would have bitten or attacked with its full force- I think it was trying to intimidate rather than to injure. 

But that beak can move with a fair bit of speed when its annoyed (which is all the time), so when it got between me and the boat I felt it best to back off for a while. 

 

[Tracy D'arth]

3 minutes ago, Tony1 said:

 

I think the swan in Ellesmere Port basin is genuinely disturbed in some way. I've never seen one so aggressive. 

I've watched many people attempt to feed it, and the swan literally bites at their hand. One of the lockkeepers told me that it injured someone a few days before I arrived.

I know of a swan having broken the arm of a man in a dinghy, but that was I think close to the young, and it was extremely protective. 

But the beast at Ellesmere Port is very unusual. I was working on the canvas cratch cover, and I didnt see it approaching.

I turned my back to the water for some reason and about a minute later I felt a bite on my calf, but fortunately it was on my wellies so I felt the bite but had no cuts. 

I tried making friends by feeding it with proper swan food, but it wasnt having any of it. 

In fairness I dont think it would have bitten or attacked with its full force- I think it was trying to intimidate rather than to injure. 

But that beak can move with a fair bit of speed when its annoyed (which is all the time), so when it got between me and the boat I felt it best to back off for a while. 

 

But they have no teeth!  You can let them grab you, if you don't pull back its not even painful.