Dog Sh@t

[Supermalc]

Stop biting Carl.........not worth it.

[Radiomariner]

And whilst you're watching for the piles of poo, don't forget dogs have a habit of weeing against most things sticking out of or resting on the ground - trees, bushes, bollards and even the odd human leg as well.

 

Don't forget to wash your hands after tying or untying your boat.

 

Dont pick any blackberries from low down on the briar either!

[kookie]

I have found the Sawley cut towpath to be full of it too. It's disgusting

I clean up after my dogs no matter where it is, I have even cleaned up other people's dog mess in and around the marina, becuase I know that if ever there is a complaint about mess, fingers will automatically be pointed at me, because I have 5.

And before anyone jumps on me who lives there, often it is the mess of visitors to the marina.

Edited November 24, 2007 by kookie

[Supermalc]

I have even cleaned up other people's dog mess in and around the marina,

 

And far from being thought of as someone who will clean up because others are too idle, it actually means it's as good as giving them a poke in the eye with a sharp stick.

[BoatsAndThat]

Dogmuck; I've said it before and I'll say it again, just think of it as smelly mud. Problem solved.

[JohnO]

Dog muck or poo till I step in it then it's dog shit. Not having a good day, stood in three piles of dog shit this morning. If you dont have a problem with this you obviousily dont live aboard and/or you should get out more often. There is a big difference between dog and horse or cow muck the later are veggie. If you ever fancy a challenge I will eat the cow pat if you eat the dog shit

 

And before anyone jumps on me who lives there, often it is the mess of visitors to the marina.

yeh the toilets arent that well signposted

 

 

Dogmuck; I've said it before and I'll say it again, just think of it as smelly mud. Problem solved.

your off your head mate

 

edit typo

Edited November 24, 2007 by JohnO

[Maverick]

What about human Shit? No ones mentioned that have they? Recent research has proved that many boaters with porta-pottis actually shit in a plastic carrier bag when BW facilities are not present.

 

The recent media coverage on banning these bags is now being re-thought as it was not apparent of the many uses these bags have. Boaters have been observed throwing these into hedgerows also, thereby preserving their DNA for future prosecution.

 

A boatyworld report even claims one culprit even had the cheek to place a bag of shit complete with tracking device on the roof of a nearby holiday hire boat. It is beleived the shit did the four counties ring in just 5 days.

 

Tests are also being carried out as to wether a viable alternative to red diesel may be human shit mixed with copius quantities of female piss.

 

The tests are in the early stages and two narrowboats have already had the sterns of their boats blown off and have had an awful amount of paint stripped from their roofs.

 

We will keep you updated with any more news as it comes in.

 

Your roving reporter Maverick for boatyworld news.

Edited November 25, 2007 by Maverick

[magnetman]

I'm going to feed my dog radioactive pal, these multicoloured bags of preserved DS in hanging in the trees would look great glowing at night specially in the run up to xmas.

[bilco]

I find this discussion highly amusing, I never knew so many people shared my interest in dogmuck. After reading everyones comments I have decided to start training my dog to go in the middle of pavements where it is most visible - that way people can avoid it more easily (if they want to) and they won't come across any surprises. But then I may also let my dog leave one or two hidden surprises just for entertainments sake.

Hurrah for smelly mud!

[carlt]

I find this discussion highly amusing, I never knew so many people shared my interest in dogmuck. After reading everyones comments I have decided to start training my dog to go in the middle of pavements where it is most visible - that way people can avoid it more easily (if they want to) and they won't come across any surprises. But then I may also let my dog leave one or two hidden surprises just for entertainments sake.

Hurrah for smelly mud!

Give us your address and, as you love it so much, we'll post you all our dogs' crap, to further your coprological interests.

[bilco]

Give us your address and, as you love it so much, we'll post you all our dogs' crap, to further your coprological interests.

 

Well I don't really need anyone elses, my dog supplies an ample amount, but thanks anyway, besides I'm more interested in the entertainment value of people tredding in it, therefore rather than posting it to me, its best to leave it on the pavement.

[Maverick]

What about human Shit? No ones mentioned that have they? Recent research has proved that many boaters with porta-pottis actually shit in a plastic carrier bag when BW facilities are not present.

 

The recent media coverage on banning these bags is now being re-thought as it was not apparent of the many uses these bags have. Boaters have been observed throwing these into hedgerows also, thereby preserving their DNA for future prosecution.

 

A boatyworld report even claims one culprit even had the cheek to place a bag of shit complete with tracking device on the roof of a nearby holiday hire boat. It is beleived the shit did the four counties ring in just 5 days.

 

Tests are also being carried out as to wether a viable alternative to red diesel may be human shit mixed with copius quantities of female piss.

 

The tests are in the early stages and two narrowboats have already had the sterns of their boats blown off and have had an awful amount of paint stripped from their roofs.

 

We will keep you updated with any more news as it comes in.

 

Your roving reporter Maverick for boatyworld news.

 

Latest news just in. Part of the Wolverhampton Community already known for their cultural tastes such as dried deer penis etc. are reported to be collecting the bags of shit and drying and crushing it into a fine powder. Apparently its the latest spice for 2007. It is however an aquired taste and one boater on N.B. Chippati was overheard shouting at his wife 'I dono wot u put in these bleedin cakes to dey my luverly they shit'

 

More news as it happens ......................

[bilco]

Latest news just in. Part of the Wolverhampton Community already known for their cultural tastes such as dried deer penis etc. are reported to be collecting the bags of shit and drying and crushing it into a fine powder. Apparently its the latest spice for 2007. It is however an aquired taste and one boater on N.B. Chippati was overheard shouting at his wife 'I dono wot u put in these bleedin cakes to dey my luverly they shit'

 

More news as it happens ......................

 

Do you have to use the S word for describing dogmuck? can't you use smelly mud or something as 'BoatsAndThat' calls it, its much less offensive, and I think its a good desciptive way of saying it too.

[Maverick]

Do you have to use the S word for describing dogmuck? can't you use smelly mud or something as 'BoatsAndThat' calls it, its much less offensive, and I think its a good desciptive way of saying it too.

 

Sort of know where your cumin from but think its a girlie thing if thats not being to sexist. (never bloody bothered me before mind )

 

Cud call it smelly mud or poo or number 2s but that aint really me. I have no idea who first invented the word shit but its a great word and sums it up perfectly. Whats the first thing you say when you tread in the stuff?

[gaggle]

get the crap on the end of a stick and when a dog owner is passing strike the stick with force against a handy post and send the crap flying from the end of the stick at speed in the direction of dog owner , as it is in flight the crap will break up to lots of small bits and ensure the dog owner gets a good spattering .

then fall about laughing.

[bilco]

get the crap on the end of a stick and when a dog owner is passing strike the stick with force against a handy post and send the crap flying from the end of the stick at speed in the direction of dog owner , as it is in flight the crap will break up to lots of small bits and ensure the dog owner gets a good spattering .

then fall about laughing.

 

hehehehe! now your talking

[Sir Nibble]

I like eating babies.

[carlt]

I like eating babies.

Shouldn't that be in the 'recipes' section?

[Sir Nibble]

Yes I know, but this seems more appropriate.

Ever seen the fun that can be had clubbing blind puppies?

[bristol & argo]

Dogmuck; I've said it before and I'll say it again, just think of it as smelly mud. Problem solved.

 

Not Problem Solved.

 

Mud, smelly or not, does not have quite the same potential for causing small children to become blind.

 

And when did letting a dog piss on our step become acceptable? I shooed a dog off once and the owner said "it's only piss", so i pointed out that his dog's piss will encourage another dog to shit, and that dog's shit could turn my toddler blind and.... i think he realised that was fairly high moral grounds and continued on his dog empying mission without retort. Five minutes later the next dog along got wet trying to piss on the step as i was washing it, so it pissed on my mooring spike instead! the owner just kept on walking well ahead of the dog.

 

 

 

Simon.

We welcome dog walkers, we object to people emptying their dog here.

[BlueStringPudding]

We welcome dog walkers, we object to people emptying their dog here.

 

P*ss on the dog back, I say. Perhaps easier for Kev than me, but I'm willing to try anything once.

 

When my parents owned a rescue Springer spaniel, he was a bit beserk and would sometimes bite people. One day it bit my dad. He bit it back. It never bit anyone again.

 

Same thing happened to my brother at playschool - he used to bite other kids till one bit him back.

 

I guess we're a bitey family.

Edited November 27, 2007 by BlueStringPudding

[Gary Peacock]

The problem is most dog owners aren't too bright I live opposite a field full of cattle the dog owners let their dogs chase the cattle so the farmer asked them to keep their dogs on the lead, they didn't so he put up a poster telling them to keep the dogs out of the field, they ignored it so the farmer put up a poster saying he would shoot any dogs worrying his stock, the dog owners ignored it.

 

The following day in relatively quick succession he shot 3 dogs with his 12 bore.

 

The problem stopped but it convinced me how thick dog owners must be or maybe they just don't care.

 

This summer I was upstairs I herd a hell of a commotion downstairs rushed down stairs and found a black Labrador behind the TV with my cats head in it's mouth, I had to more or less kick the dog to death to get it off the cat, the dog owner was distraught and was going to report me to the police for injuring the dog!

 

This further confirmed my view of dog owners.

[BlueStringPudding]

This further confirmed my view of dog owners.

 

It's not just dog owners. I'm a "doggy person" and the only reason I don't have one now is because of the hours I work - it wouldn't be fair to keep a dog.

 

However the majority of dog owners I've met are friendly, conscientious people - as are their dogs! Dog owners who have dogs who behave badly are people who behave badly:

 

You see scumbag people with pyscho dogs. You see scumbag people with pyscho children. You see nice but ineffective people with out of control children, you see nice but ineffective people with out of control dogs. Neither should be allowed either, in my opinion! As much because it's not fair on the kid/dog who doesn't understand why people outside of the home have a problem with its behaviour.

 

I believe there's no such thing as bad dogs, just bad owners. Nurture vs nature, and all that. Now if you don't mind, I'm going to take a slash behind the sofa.

Edited November 27, 2007 by BlueStringPudding

[bristol & argo]

This summer I was upstairs I herd a hell of a commotion downstairs rushed down stairs and found a black Labrador behind the TV with my cats head in it's mouth, I had to more or less kick the dog to death to get it off the cat, the dog owner was distraught and was going to report me to the police for injuring the dog!

 

This further confirmed my view of dog owners.

 

Yes why do they let, or sometimes engourage their dogs to risk having their noses and eyes sliced open. Do they not realise when the cat gets home, it will stop and fight for it's life.

 

personally, i'm waiting for one of them to chase the cat right inside. If the dog survives, the police will probably have the dangerous dog put down.

You should have offered to call the police for them.

 

 

Simon.

[Maverick]

The problem is most dog owners aren't too bright I live opposite a field full of cattle the dog owners let their dogs chase the cattle so the farmer asked them to keep their dogs on the lead, they didn't so he put up a poster telling them to keep the dogs out of the field, they ignored it so the farmer put up a poster saying he would shoot any dogs worrying his stock, the dog owners ignored it.

 

The following day in relatively quick succession he shot 3 dogs with his 12 bore.

 

The problem stopped but it convinced me how thick dog owners must be or maybe they just don't care.

 

This summer I was upstairs I herd a hell of a commotion downstairs rushed down stairs and found a black Labrador behind the TV with my cats head in it's mouth, I had to more or less kick the dog to death to get it off the cat, the dog owner was distraught and was going to report me to the police for injuring the dog!

This further confirmed my view of dog owners.

 

Havnt got a video of that hav you Gary?