For those of you unfortunate enough to have a pump-out

[Alan de Enfield]

A complete (?) list of pump-out locations - coastal and inland

 

http://www.thegreenblue.org.uk/pump_out_directory.aspx

[Paul C]

Just had a quick look, there's loads of omissions, so the list is basically useless. Just use something like Pearson's guides.

[Paul's Nulife4-2]

I think it's a good starting point, or a work in progress that can be constantly built on & upgraded with information. But agree, there are a lot of omissions

(Now what Would be good, is a list of WORKING pumpout stations that are available. !.)

[mango]

Maybe next we need a list of WORKING sanitary stations for the really unfortunate ones who have to carry around containers of their own excrement.

[Keeping Up]

I was REALLY fortunate on Saturday. After we passed Streethay I spotted a sign at the entrance to Kings Orchard marina offering Free Pumpouts during August. In we went and asked what was the catch, they said there was no catch it was just a publicity stunt. So we had our free pumpout and left without spending a penny, as it were, and were very happy.

 

To pay them back I will say it seems to be a really nice marina and so far it's only half full.

[RLWP]

Northampton Marina is a great price for pump-outs, £10 for long enough to empty both our tanks

 

Richard

[ditchcrawler]

I was REALLY fortunate on Saturday. After we passed Streethay I spotted a sign at the entrance to Kings Orchard marina offering Free Pumpouts during August. In we went and asked what was the catch, they said there was no catch it was just a publicity stunt. So we had our free pumpout and left without spending a penny, as it were, and were very happy.

 

To pay them back I will say it seems to be a really nice marina and so far it's only half full.

And their diesel is normally a reasonable price

[Ssscrudddy]

Another vote for Northampton marina. 17 minutes sucking time, with a pause button that doesnt time out on you.

[saltysplash]

Another vote for Northampton marina. 17 minutes sucking time, with a pause button that doesnt time out on you.

 

I was given a similar offer down a side street in Ostend once

[Paul's Nulife4-2]

[Peter X]

I was given a similar offer down a side street in Ostend once

 

In 1985 I took my mother for her first trip abroad, a few days in Brussels. One evening walking along the street she asked me, and I'm not making this up,

"Those women sitting in that shop window, are they selling underwear?"

[George94]

 

In 1985 I took my mother for her first trip abroad, a few days in Brussels. One evening walking along the street she asked me, and I'm not making this up,

"Those women sitting in that shop window, are they selling underwear?"

 

You do take your mum to some funny places.

[John Williamson 1955]

Maybe next we need a list of WORKING sanitary stations for the really unfortunate ones who have to carry around containers of their own excrement.

Could someone set up a Wiki? Unfortunately, one would kill the bandwidth and data limits on my website.

[Dave_P]

I was given a similar offer down a side street in Ostend once

Is that why your name is SaltySplash?

[Paul's Nulife4-2]

Do you know that the Blue Whale is one of the Biggest Mammals on the Planet.

& people often ponder why the sea is so salty !.

[Alan de Enfield]

Do you know that the Blue Whale is one of the Biggest Mammals on the Planet.

& people often ponder why the sea is so salty !.

 

Urban Myth :-

 

The average blue whale produces over 400 gallons of sperm when it ejaculates, but only 10% of that actually makes it into his mate. So 360 gallons are spilled into the ocean every time one unloads, and you wonder why the ocean is so salty...

 

The Truth :

 

Blue whales being the largest animals on the planet, it stands to reason that their reproductive organs ought to be of similarly impressive dimensions, and that is certainly the case. By one estimate, the penis of a blue whale can measure up to 16 feet long and its testicles weigh in at around 25 pounds apiece. But even packing 50 pounds of bollocks — the weight of an average-sized bulldog, if you need a benchmark — it's absurd to imagine that a blue whale (or any other creature on earth, for that matter) could produce 400 gallons of seminal fluid at a time, or even one-tenth that amount.

 

To sum up:

1. Blue whales can't possibly ejaculate 400 gallons of sperm (the capacity of an average-sized hot tub) — not even close.
2. There are good reasons to avoid making a habit of drinking sea water but sperm spillover isn't one of them.
3. Which is more than can be said for hot tub water

[Peter X]

I think it's a good starting point, or a work in progress that can be constantly built on & upgraded with information. But agree, there are a lot of omissions

(Now what Would be good, is a list of WORKING pumpout stations that are available. !.)

 

Yes, there seems to be a real need for this, as no one source appears to provide an accurate list, or if it does no-one's yet mentioned it. The same applies to other facilities along canals or rivers which gradually come and go, such as elsan, water points, and of course pubs, so this is just one part of the problems discussed in "Boaters' guides are back".

 

In post #14 there I mentioned what I think is the best solution, which is for someone, probably CRT, to keep a centralised list of such information, update it, and feed the data out to boaters in suitable formats which don't gobble up bandwidth. One good list which can be accessed over a slow connection is a lot better than three incomplete and out of date lists, or one excellent list which is only accessible over fast broadband.

 

It's quite possible in theory for a keen group of amateurs, for example put together from the IT people on this forum, to gather in the data from CRT and other sources and provide it in suitable formats for everyone including mobile phone apps, but in practice would such a group have the commitment to sustain the project, for example to keep doing the data entry to update the database?

[Paul's Nulife4-2]

I'm never going to look at Dawn French's 'Churchy' in the same way again !.

[Ssscrudddy]

Seeing as we are talking about willies & blue whales, did you know they have a prehensile willy.

[Paul's Nulife4-2]

A what ?,, is it a good thing ?, and is it worth having plastic surgery to replicate ?.

[Paul C]

 

Yes, there seems to be a real need for this, as no one source appears to provide an accurate list, or if it does no-one's yet mentioned it. The same applies to other facilities along canals or rivers which gradually come and go, such as elsan, water points, and of course pubs, so this is just one part of the problems discussed in "Boaters' guides are back".

 

In post #14 there I mentioned what I think is the best solution, which is for someone, probably CRT, to keep a centralised list of such information, update it, and feed the data out to boaters in suitable formats which don't gobble up bandwidth. One good list which can be accessed over a slow connection is a lot better than three incomplete and out of date lists, or one excellent list which is only accessible over fast broadband.

 

It's quite possible in theory for a keen group of amateurs, for example put together from the IT people on this forum, to gather in the data from CRT and other sources and provide it in suitable formats for everyone including mobile phone apps, but in practice would such a group have the commitment to sustain the project, for example to keep doing the data entry to update the database?

 

I mentioned in post #2 a reasonable solution - to use Pearson's guides. Yes, I know they don't cover the inland waterways 100%; and that they're split over about 10 books; and they cost money; but those aren't really issues. They cover the vast majority of the 'popular' waterways and you only really need one or two books for the local area you're in - for example if I'm in Cheshire, I don't need a list of pumpouts and other facilities on the K&A etc.

[George94]

Perhaps the compilers of the loo list would consult Pearson's Guides, so then the rest of us won't have to. In the era of the Internet it is not unreasonable to expect this sort of information to be online - and free. (As well as correct!)

[Peter X]

 

I mentioned in post #2 a reasonable solution - to use Pearson's guides. Yes, I know they don't cover the inland waterways 100%; and that they're split over about 10 books; and they cost money; but those aren't really issues. They cover the vast majority of the 'popular' waterways and you only really need one or two books for the local area you're in - for example if I'm in Cheshire, I don't need a list of pumpouts and other facilities on the K&A etc.

 

To state the obvious, a book will tell you how things were when it was last revised before going to press. So it's good for navigation, it'll show the bridges and locks and place names. It can also tell you where pumpouts were... when it was last revised before going to press. What it cannot tell you about is stoppages, or whether any facilities have been added or closed since, or to confirm that the one you hope to use five miles ahead is currently working.

 

As George94 says, it is not unreasonable to expect this sort of information to be online, free and correct. There is some cost in time and money in putting information online, even if the best possible use is made of volunteers, but that cost need not be much if it's done sensibly, and CRT should see it as value for money indirect marketing, just like B&Q putting their store locations and opening hours on their site. CRT want people to put boats on canals and pay licence fees, and telling customers about their services is a cheap way to encourage that to happen. Somewhere at CRT there should be a list in a computer of where all their services are, which are working, and when problems are scheduled to be fixed, so the hard part of the IT work, gathering the data, should already be done.

 

Somehow I fear things may not be this good? Private industry has its faults, such as the short-term greed of shareholders and some directors, but it does usually understand the importance of efficient IT, marketing and customer service, and CRT sounds as if it could do with a manager or two from that background to get things done.

[Paul C]

 

To state the obvious, a book will tell you how things were when it was last revised before going to press. So it's good for navigation, it'll show the bridges and locks and place names. It can also tell you where pumpouts were... when it was last revised before going to press. What it cannot tell you about is stoppages, or whether any facilities have been added or closed since, or to confirm that the one you hope to use five miles ahead is currently working.

 

As George94 says, it is not unreasonable to expect this sort of information to be online, free and correct. There is some cost in time and money in putting information online, even if the best possible use is made of volunteers, but that cost need not be much if it's done sensibly, and CRT should see it as value for money indirect marketing, just like B&Q putting their store locations and opening hours on their site. CRT want people to put boats on canals and pay licence fees, and telling customers about their services is a cheap way to encourage that to happen. Somewhere at CRT there should be a list in a computer of where all their services are, which are working, and when problems are scheduled to be fixed, so the hard part of the IT work, gathering the data, should already be done.

 

Somehow I fear things may not be this good? Private industry has its faults, such as the short-term greed of shareholders and some directors, but it does usually understand the importance of efficient IT, marketing and customer service, and CRT sounds as if it could do with a manager or two from that background to get things done.

 

The only way to know if a facility is working, is to phone about 5 minutes beforehand, and even then its not 100% guaranteed! We once wanted a pump-out, and phoned a marina which we were around half an hour away, to confirm they did pumpouts and the machine was working fine etc - yes no worries they said. When we arrived, the machine had broken during pumping out the boat before us. We waited an hour or so to see if they could fix it, but gave up.

[George94]

 

The only way to know if a facility is working, is to phone about 5 minutes beforehand, and even then its not 100% guaranteed! We once wanted a pump-out, and phoned a marina which we were around half an hour away, to confirm they did pumpouts and the machine was working fine etc - yes no worries they said. When we arrived, the machine had broken during pumping out the boat before us. We waited an hour or so to see if they could fix it, but gave up.

 

There is no way any system can deal with that scenario (which fortunately is not an everyday occurrence), but an internet-based information system can tell you about planned maintenance and about facilities that are no longer available. And, indeed, about when new ones are planned to be available.