Peter X

Ee, it's grim up north. Looks pretty awful. And a bit grim everywhere else at the moment really. People have mentioned the South Oxford getting too much water from the Cherwell, and there are CRT notices about that. Also, I see on the EA website that the whole non-tidal Thames is on red boards now, and we know from another topic that the Wey is breached just above Guildford. Jeremy Corbyn, looking for votes in Yorkshire the other day, said that if that flooding had happened in Surrey the government would have done more about it, but have they? I suspect that every seat in and around Guildford will elect a Conservative regardless of party policies about flood defences on the Wey.

Indeed! My research suggests that students of today do seem to have other crumpet-related problems... This article features one who is apparently scared of them, or rather of anything with repetitive patterns of holes: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-48058863 There's a forum for students, which is helpful... This is quite a discussion of what to put on top (no mention of how they cook them): https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=4752938 Hummus!? Come on students of today, what's wrong with traditional butter? That's about all we ever used in my day. However here's quite an entertaining topic about whether crumpets can be eaten raw, which does include some discussion of how to cook them. It appears that your average modern student has no electric/gas wall fires, but access to a kitchen including a microwave oven: https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=312268 How do some of these people get into university? I loved their OP's comment "Im starving, I have no way to heat them up, will I die?"!

This toasting technique probably won't be much use on boats, but one of the first things I learnt at university in 1973 was how to toast crumpets on an electric wall fire, that being the standard heating the college provided. When it's off and cold, you twist paper clips around two of the horizontal metal wires of the safety guard, with one end sticking out, angled slightly upwards. So when a crumpet is pushed onto one or two of these paper clip ends, it stays on, and the fire will toast it. Watch it doesn't burn, remove and turn the crumpet halfway through, spread some butter on and that's it, lovely. Some engineering student probably put quite a bit of thought into that design. Nowadays I just have a toaster and use that.

I guess lots of canals would be fine, but ideally for a beginner avoid rivers, wide locks, and anywhere with too many locks (or very few: potentially boring!). Consider whether a long tunnel could be off-putting; some people might love that on a first trip, others wouldn't! Also, probably do a first trip in nice weather. Not too hot, cold or wet. Not that it put me off; my first trip ever was a few miles on a frosty day in January, including three locks; my brother just wanted crew to operate those for him.

That's a long journey by water, two weeks plus I suppose, but worth considering if you have the time and inclination to do it yourself, and don't mind either boating in winter (despite any stoppages? I haven't checked) or waiting for better weather in spring. Otherwise I guess that road haulage might be the economic way to go, as the distance by road is not huge and it may cost less than a boat mover. If in doubt, ask the recommended people for quotes for each.

Zomboat is a great laugh, still available on ITV Hub. Also coming in the new year, the NBT pair Nuneaton and Brighton will be appearing in an episode of "Father Brown" on the BBC.

Yikes! I went up the Wey to Godalming and back last month delivering solid fuels with the NBT, and while several things did happen to delay us, this wasn't included. Hopefully they'll find a way to rebuild that bank to restore navigation above Guildford, and well before the NBT wants to return, which isn't until next October. I suppose the Farncombe boats will have to concentrate on day hire for a while, and the available stretch is rather short even for that.

Lionel Richie, if he writes his lyrics on bricks.

Good job someone rescued that boat, because a few miles downstream from Abingdon is the tight corner into the lock cut for Culham Lock. I'd expect that a boat going that way adrift would instead be pushed by the current past the DANGER sign towards the weir, especially as the Thames has had a lot of water flowing down it recently. Whoever got aboard it may have had their work cut out getting it to safety if they couldn't start the engine; it would depend on whether they could get near enough to a bank to get a rope around something, and that in turn would depend on either getting help from another boat, or on having a pole and knowing how to use it; not simple. To reunite the boat with its owner, I'd expect CRT would help if it has a CRT registration number, even though it's on EA waters. Otherwise I'm not sure what EA could do; do those window stickers they issue to registered vessels have some serial number that makes them traceable? I think the lock keeper does note the boat name when issuing one, so that may help.

Good question, but I meant the bottles. I'd imagine that absorbing an impact might well burst a bottle, but it would have done its job and most people would soon have a free replacement as they'll be using the milk anyway. The boat I saw these bottles on probably has some value, not that I looked closely. If it floats and has a working engine, I reckon a boat has value to someone.

I can't imagine those bicycle inner tubes giving much protection; when something is going to meet the boat, it may well miss those thin tubes. Still, good luck to whoever is salvaging the boat; it's maybe not the ideal time of year for such a project. Last week, it was either on the Thames or the Wey but I forget exactly where, I saw a boat, GRP I think it was, using several plastic milk bottles full of water with string tied round the handles dangled over the side as fenders. Rather cheapskate for such a posh area, but fairly effective I guess. Until there's a real impact, when I suppose the bottles would tend to burst and collapse. But who cares when the replacement cost is virtually zero?

INTERNET: Pronunciation in some areas of "isn't a net", as in "That internet, that's a string bag". In London that would be "is'n a ne'" because t is mostly silent.

I'm sure I saw a whole list of such titles many years ago; including: "Cliff tragedy" by Ilene Dover.

I always wondered what Jimi Hendrix meant when he wrote "have you ever been experienced?". There's a site for that, but it doesn't shed much light on it as far as I can see: https://songmeanings.com/songs/view/18301/ Now I know, he was an American living in London for a while, so I suppose he went canal boating. If the song really was about being open-minded as some say, I hope he did so away from London as, interesting though the London canals can be, there are plenty of other good places to go to. He'd have to watch that barnet of his going under low bridges anywhere of course.

The NBT did the deliveries and got out in the end; I left the boats at Molesey lock on Saturday evening, and I expect they're off at Brentford by now. All through this, the lower part of the river has had less trouble, maybe because it's wider and deeper I suppose. The Wey was rather lively when I was steering the butty down it on a line on Friday; I confess I did have the stern into the bushes a few times. Nothing was lost overboard, but I did get one leg immersed after slipping on the wet boards on a lock gate.