Why, oh why do we become so attached

[magpie patrick]

Hi all

 

Some may remember that we were having health problems with our Dog.

 

Well today was the day that we had to make 'that' decision to have her put to sleep.

 

All done very nicely, peacefully and with dignity.

 

I'm in a right state.

 

She's okay now, I know, but Margaret and I are the ones in a mess.

 

Anyway, onwards and upwards.

 

Martyn

 

 

"When the fourteen years that nature permits" etc. With animals, we have to make some tough decisions and this is perhaps the toughest of them all. You have done the right thing for your Dog, and given you could make that decision, the canine must have felt loved and spoilt from start to finish. That's what matters.

 

One day, you may feel like getting another one, until then, cherish the memories.

 

>HUG<

Edited June 19, 2012 by magpie patrick

[churchward]

I didn't think I'd get another dog, when I had Tommy PTS last September after 14 years of friendship.

 

I now have two young rescue lurchers of my own and am fostering a homeless one for a rescue charity, until she finds her home for life.

 

I still find myself feeling sad though, especially when inadvertently calling Sheridan "Tommy" as he shares so many character traits with Tommy when he was young.

I know what you mean I think. It took over 3 months for us to decide get another dog but the basic truth for me was that not having an animal about the house (and to share boating) with was too big a whole in my life. Then there are just those events that happen. I wasn't looking for a pet cat but got one delivered to our door step on one time returning from a holiday on the boat. A waif and stray but he seemed to take a shine to me and taking him in Sammy was my little pal for the rest of his life. I shan't forget him.

 

I too felt guilty/sad when I called our present dog Jack, Eric in unguarded moments or used some other expression reserved for Eric.

 

Any loss is difficult and the special relationship we have with our pets is a very personal one so it comes hard when we lose them. I don't think I actually get over the loss just learn to cope with it.

[ChimneyChain]

When jasper gave up after 15 great years we rescued candy a 6 year black lab ( ex breeding bitch ) we both decided not to get another puppie but a rescue dog as there are just too many dogs that need a new start in life. People who haven't had a dog will just not understand what a dog can give you.

 

Darren

[magpie patrick]

 

I still find myself feeling sad though, especially when inadvertently calling Sheridan "Tommy" as he shares so many character traits with Tommy when he was young.

 

Jim, Chorley and Rosie are now nearly three

 

I still occasionally call Jim "Jules", my previous ginger one

 

We have cats. despite the difference, the sense of having an animal as a companion is the same

[Ange]

"When the fourteen years that nature permits" etc. With animals, we have to make some tough decisions and this is perhaps the toughest of them all. You have done the right thing for your Dog, and given you could make that decision, the canine must have felt loved and spoilt from start to finish. That's what matters.

 

One day, you may feel like getting another one, until then, cherish the memories.

 

>HUG<

 

What a lovely post Patrick - brought tears to my eyes.

 

We've only had Millie for a year and a half but she's already deeply entwined in our lives.

 

A virtual hug from me too.

[jelunga]

Two years ago I lost both my parents followed by a very good friend. I held it all together pretty well... and then we had to have our black lab put to sleep and I completely lost it.

 

All the best.

 

Sad that you have lost your pet as well as the OP. I find your comments about parents interesting. I wonder why that is? Could it be that humans can communicate and we have may have the opportunity to "say goodbye" to them and with pets we cannot?

 

 

 

I know when my father died in hospital all the immediate fsmily were there, even my brother from the USA. I am sure I have coped better with his death by being able to talk to him whilst he was in hospital and he seemed to happy with the event to happen and was well prepared almost looking forward to getting it all over with.

 

 

 

However, when we had to have our cat put down due to a large tumour it was worse because we were unable to talk to the cat about it.

[Kessy]

So very, very sorry to hear your news :-(

 

I sometimes wonder if there is any greater love than that between a Dog and his human companions.

 

I have had some heartache in my life. Two days after my 19th birthday my Father died in my arms at the age of 46 after a very long struggle with Cancer.

 

4 yrs ago i had Mum in and out of hosptital with all manner of health problems and i sat with her for 48hrs in intensive care and held her hand when she passed.

That almost destroyed me i am not ashamed to admit and 6 days later i bought Bosun, my Bullmastiff pup.

He got me through losing mum and we are never apart.

 

Although he is only just turned 4yrs and is in his prime i sometimes think ahead, hopefully a good few years ahead to when it is his turn to wait at the Rainbow bridge.

 

Please don't misunderstand me, i loved my Mother beyond words but i know that when i lose my Boy that it will hit me every bit as hard if not harder than anything

i have been through before.

 

To answer the question ''why do we become so attached ?''.

The reason is a Dog's love to their owner is totally unconditional, they would give their life to protect you and they are always pleased to see you.

They comfort us in times of need and give us years of happiness and tears of laughter when growing up.

They are indeed, our best friends.

 

My sincere condolences to Margaret and yourself Martyn.

[GSer]

I do feel for you, we lost our old dog Molly a few weeks back, loosing her was a real wrench, but, life goes on so we have another crew member on his way the end of this week, no way will he ever replace Molly in our hearts but I hope he will honour us by keeping us company for a while at least.

 

Oooo I have something in my eye, must go

[Pykebird]

So sorry to hear of your loss,but as said before, time is a great healer and if/when the time is right you will find someonelse who needs you both. In most cases, they will find you. You made a brave decision, putting the needs of your loved one first and are to be commended.

Each time a shoe is chewed, or hair has to be removed from everything,I remind myself that the times we spend with our pets are so short that it doesn't really matter about the rest.

Take Care(just given my guys a big hug)

[Nightwatch]

I do feel for you, we lost our old dog Molly a few weeks back, loosing her was a real wrench, but, life goes on so we have another crew member on his way the end of this week, no way will he ever replace Molly in our hearts but I hope he will honour us by keeping us company for a while at least.

 

Oooo I have something in my eye, must go

Thank you as I believe I slightly hy-jacked your thread.

 

I'm sure he will.

 

Martyn

[Tigerr]

I do feel for you, we lost our old dog Molly a few weeks back, loosing her was a real wrench, but, life goes on so we have another crew member on his way the end of this week, no way will he ever replace Molly in our hearts but I hope he will honour us by keeping us company for a while at least.

 

Oooo I have something in my eye, must go

 

I am sorry to hear that Molly went - that must have been just after we met you at aldermaston. Your dogs are/were great characters. Sorry for the OP too - it does take a long time and another dog seems to be the best solution.

[Nightwatch]

I do feel for you, we lost our old dog Molly a few weeks back, loosing her was a real wrench, but, life goes on so we have another crew member on his way the end of this week, no way will he ever replace Molly in our hearts but I hope he will honour us by keeping us company for a while at least.

 

Oooo I have something in my eye, must go

I'm feeling a lot more positive about what I have done to Rio.

 

I think it was in fact the Guinness.

 

Martyn

Edited June 19, 2012 by Nightwatch

[Guest]

I'm feeling a lot more positive about what I have done to Rio.

 

I think it was in fact the Guinness.

 

Martyn

 

Don't dally before you get another, we dally'd and dilly'd for a good few months thinking 'he could never be replaced' - they can't, agreed, but the best thing we ever did was getting another who we love just as much, OK a much smaller model from the one we had, agreed....

[aread2]

The Power of the Dog

by

Rudyard Kipling

 

There is sorrow enough in the natural way

From men and women to fill our day;

And when we are certain of sorrow in store,

Why do we always arrange for more?

Brothers and sisters, I bid you beware

Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.

 

Buy a pup and your money will buy

Love unflinching that cannot lie--

Perfect passsion and worship fed

By a kick in the ribs or a pat on the head.

Nevertheless it is hardly fair

To risk your heart to a dog to tear.

 

When the fourteen years which Nature permits

Are closing in asthma, or tumour, or fits,

And the vet's unspoken prescription runs

To lethal chambers or loaded guns,

Then you will find--it's your own affair--

But ... you've given your heart to a dog to tear.

 

When the body that lived at your single will,

With its whimper of welcome, is stilled (how still!)

When the spirit that answered your every mood

Is gone--wherever it goes--for good,

You will discover how much you care,

And will give your heart to a dog to tear.

 

We've sorrow enough in the natural way,

When it comes to burying Christian clay.

Our loves are not given, but only lent,

At compound interest of cent per cent.

Though it is not always the case, I believe,

That the longer we've kept 'em, the more do we grieve:

For, when debts are payable, right or wrong,

A short-term loan is as bad as a long--

So why in--Heaven (before we are there)

Should we give our hearts to a dog to tear?

[Millsy]

So sorry for your loss, Martyn. You fulfilled your final responsibility to your friend in return for the love he gave you.

In the past we have had every dog 'put to sleep' by the vet and had wished that we hadn't had to make 'that decision'. We imagined that having your dog die peacefully in its sleep would be preferable, but when this happened to us at Hawkesbury at Easter we were completely devastated. Such a shock!

But, the truth is, that another dog will help.

[tillergirl]

Martin please don't reproach yourself. its never easy to make the decision I know, we've had to do ourselves twice in the last 5 years. But at least we can make the choice not to see our pets suffer needlessly.

 

Run free at Rainbow Bridge xx

[RichardN]

One of our greyhounds, Poppy, made her final trip to the Vets just after 4am this morning. It was absolutely what needed doing and had to be done then but I don't think I will ever get better coping with that stage

[churchward]

One of our greyhounds, Poppy, made her final trip to the Vets just after 4am this morning. It was absolutely what needed doing and had to be done then but I don't think I will ever get better coping with that stage

Sorry to hear your news.

 

I think we would no be human and have become unfeeling if we were not effected by such events and our own animals.

 

I knew a vet where I used to live in Wiltshire that undertook the dreadful task on a regular basis and of course he did get numb to the event with other peoples animals although he couldn't avoid getting attached to those animals he regularly saw up to a point but could keep a professional detachment. However when it came to putting down his own dog that had come to the end due to old age he was as upset as the rest of us. They cease to be just a dog or cat or whatever when they live with you all the time and you know them as a personality.

[Zayna]

One of our greyhounds, Poppy, made her final trip to the Vets just after 4am this morning. It was absolutely what needed doing and had to be done then but I don't think I will ever get better coping with that stage

 

Oh no, not another. I'm so sorry.

 

The pain and loss we feel is the price we have to pay for loving them so dearly.

 

Take care of yourself.

[Nightwatch]

One of our greyhounds, Poppy, made her final trip to the Vets just after 4am this morning. It was absolutely what needed doing and had to be done then but I don't think I will ever get better coping with that stage

It hurts. My thoughts are with you and your family.

 

On a positive note, I do feel so much better today than yesterday and probably better tomorrow.

 

The house is empty and I am still 'having me moments'

 

Martyn

[Guest]

It hurts. My thoughts are with you and your family.

 

On a positive note, I do feel so much better today than yesterday and probably better tomorrow.

 

The house is empty and I am still 'having me moments'

 

Martyn

 

It is sometimes very hard for a non dog lover to understand.

 

I went to our boat last week without Jan who was 'hen partying' and I didn't take Dennis either as I was doing some jobs on the boat and didn't want him in the way. Normally if I go to the boat on my own I take him with me.

 

The sound of silence was deafening for sure - I never realise just how much I natter to him until he wasn't there to natter to.

 

Chin up...

[Proper Charlie]

It hurts. My thoughts are with you and your family.

 

On a positive note, I do feel so much better today than yesterday and probably better tomorrow.

 

The house is empty and I am still 'having me moments'

 

Martyn

 

As others have said Martyn, get another dog. I did. You'll probably feel like you're being a traitor and also that you'll never love the new dog half as much. But you aren't - and you will.

[Nightwatch]

Spent a bit of today searching the internet for sites re-homing dogs.

 

Just can't decide if we want another Staffie or go back to past favourite Jack Russells.

 

Don't really want to get involved in jumping through hoops to be 'allowed' to adopt take on a homeless dog. Undecided whether to go for Puppy or older.

 

I'm really okay now, surprisingly, after a terrible day yesterday.

 

 

Martyn

[blackrose]

This will go against the grain slightly, but it has to be said...

 

In reply to the question "Why do we become so attached to our pets?" Surely it's because we anthropomorphise our pets, attributing complex human thought and emotions to animals which often don't possess such capabilities. We "love" our pets and we think that love is reciprocated - when in fact most pets hang around simply because they depend on us for their survival. If you stopped feeding your dog for a day and then someone else came along and fed it, that dog would be off in a shot!

 

I'm not judging anyone who has strong feelings for their pet - I like dogs and I'm sure if I owned one then I would end up feeling the same. However, the very act of pet ownership is a relationship between controlling but deluded humans and helpless, dependent animals.

[Nightwatch]

This will go against the grain slightly, but it has to be said...

 

In reply to the question "Why do we become so attached to our pets?" Surely it's because we anthropomorphise our pets, attributing complex human thought and emotions to animals which often don't possess such capabilities. We "love" our pets and we think that love is reciprocated - when in fact most pets hang around simply because they depend on us for their survival. If you stopped feeding your dog for a day and then someone else came along and fed it, that dog would be off in a shot!

 

I'm not judging anyone who has strong feelings for their pet - I like dogs and I'm sure if I owned one then I would end up feeling the same. However, the very act of pet ownership is a relationship between controlling but deluded humans and helpless, dependent animals.

I agree, it had to be said.

 

Hey ho.

 

Martyn