Boats

[Moley]

Some of these posts seem to be getting quite heavy and political, so let's lighten things up and get emotive and sexist instead.

 

There is a word for it, when we start to ascribe 'human' characteristics and personality to pets or even inanimate objects, but I'm damned if I can think of it.

 

So what about boats? Some have more character than others, but can anyone deny they all have personality? Are they alive? Do they have soul?

 

As you may all be aware, I'm completely renovating a 20+ year old boat. She's completely stripped and I'm engaged in rust treatment - scraping, chiselling and digging the stuff out of the 'dry' bilge. I can't believe that much rust would come from just mill scale, but it's mostly coming away as a single layer where it's been permanently damp under the ballast slabs (not raised), and leaving a fairly smooth and apparently sound surface below.

 

So why does it feel like she's co-operating, yielding to me, shedding a skin, like she knows I'm doing it to help?

 

And why am I talking to her as I'm working? Stuff like "Oh well done. You good girl, you can have some nice Vactan and bitumen for that."

 

And why have ships and boats always historically been 'She's, not 'He's and certainly never 'It's ?

 

Following on from that, most boats seem to have female or sexless names (place names or wordplay), but some have male names - does that give them gender issues? (Anyone with a 'male' boat, eg Chris with Daedalus - comments please).

 

Back to mine, have I bought a boat, or embarked upon an affair? Why do I feel I have become emotionally involved? Sure, I'll share her with the wife and kids, but I'm the one giving her new life, and she's my boat! But if she's just steel and wood and glass, why do I feel protective, almost paternal?

 

Or have I just lost it?

 

Over to you.

[DHutch]

Our boat is deffonatly a she. [EmilyAnne]

 

"Isnt she goin well today" (a day on oen water no doubt)

"Doesnt she look lovely now" (just after we did her roof)

"Isnt she being a bi*ch today" (tubes proberbly all sooted up)

"Ouch, how does she look" (just after we hit the bridge)

- etc.

 

It would be wierd to have a bloke as a boat! (chris?)

 

 

Daniel

[Bill]

Some of these posts seem to be getting quite heavy and political, so let's lighten things up and get emotive and sexist instead.

 

There is a word for it, when we start to ascribe 'human' characteristics and personality to pets or even inanimate objects, but I'm damned if I can think of it.

 

 

The word you're looking for is Anthropomorphism.

 

Bill

[Moley]

Thanks Bill,

 

and I've got a reputation for being a smart-a***

[stuart]

Moley, are those Bitumen fumes getting to you!?!?!

[NB Willawaw]

The last time I saw this happen was in the Stephen King film "Christine" and you know how that ended !

[Bones]

Hmmm... My boat hates me.... it doesn't like having hols drilled and is upset with the paint colour and is cold and.. and... and...

 

how can I convince it its good for it? I suppose my boat sees me as the dentist...

[DHutch]

I suppose my boat sees me as the dentist...

Lol, thats good!

[lymmranger]

now i`m really scared....

 

some of you guys live close to me...

 

maybe a bit too close....

 

just tell me you dont keep white rabbits...

Edited October 27, 2005 by lymmranger

[Moley]

Now come on you guys (and where are the gals?)

 

I've set myself up here for some serious mickey-taking

and exposed my sensitive side

 

Dan's first reply was good, Bill's plugged a gap in my vocabulary, but there's been little attempt to answer the questions and I'm disappointed with you

 

Ade.

 

PS: Couldn't get down to the boat yesterday, so suffering from withdrawal, but will be going down this afternoon for my next bitumen 'fix'

[John Orentas]

I can't see how there can be much of a debate about this, what else is there that from the moment you aquire it needs constant attention and demands heaps of money spent on it on a weekly basis simply to stop it from rapidly going downhill and crumbling into terminal dereliction.

[bottle]

I can't see how there can be much of a debate about this, what else is there that from the moment you aquire it needs constant attention and demands heaps of money spent on it on a weekly basis simply to stop it from rapidly going downhill and crumbling into terminal dereliction.

 

John

 

I think you are looking for the obvious answer, so I will oblige, the other half

[nbtafelberg]

Our boat has feelings

 

She HATED the thames whenever we came towards Cowley to her old mooring she ran much better and was much happier and so to appease HER and keep HER happy we are now moored in Cowley where she is VERY happy.

 

(apart from the fact she says "COWLEY LOCK" on the side) which might have something to do with it.

[Carrie]

Right now, my boat belongs to someone else.

 

But you see, he (yes, it's a he) KNOWS the day will come when he will gain his rightful owner/partner on the waterways. Oh yes, he does his duty, puts up with the rubbish name they've given him and with the occasional visits of his once-enthusiastic owners who have recently bought a caravanette and spend more time in that these days - he knows this too will pass and he and I will be united.

Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon - and for the rest of your life.

[Maffi]

I can't see how there can be much of a debate about this, what else is there that from the moment you aquire it, it needs constant attention and demands heaps of money spent on it on a weekly basis simply to stop it from rapidly going downhill and crumbling into terminal dereliction.

 

 

John, you have just described both my ex-wives..................to a 'T'

Edited October 28, 2005 by Maffi

[DHutch]

So wheres Chris.

- I want to talk to somone with a male boat!

 

 

Daniel

[Maffi]

So wheres Chris.

- I want to talk to somone with a male boat!

Daniel

 

 

Is this a guy thing Daniel?

[Guest st170dw]

So wheres Chris.

- I want to talk to somone with a male boat!

Daniel

 

There is also the possibility they are malevolent its!

[Paul Evans]

My boat - and it's definitely an "it" not a "she" - needs talking to frequently. Sometimes, it likes extra heat before it will start and likes me to offer coaxing phrases such as "Come on you b***h, just start will you." So how come, if it's an "it", I end up using words like b***h?

[gaggle]

so this is the smokers thread eh man good shit going down here.

mellow out,hey baby im cool youre cool we are all cool.

 

as i said to me boat last night whats happening sweetness,MAN i is floating she says dont make waves,baby i says i want to put my hand up your frock down by the lock,i want to propel you along to the bridge of bliss,broad or narrow i will give you the kiss,i want to go large on your barge place the windlass on youre ar*e and smoke the grass.

to much sailing in the fresh air

[lymmranger]

hmm... Gaggle...

have you been getting too close to the sort of substances that you are acusing others of abusing... ???

kind of appropriate smilie ... eh?

[DaveR]

Right I was quite happy with the way things were and now . . . .

 

The Lord Bensham is still refered to as 'her' - the other woman by OCM. Does that make her a transvestite? A cross dresser?

 

On the run home when she was running rough all the encouragement was 'come on old girl' - offers of a nice lube job - a bit of TLC. If the boat was male . . . .. don't even go there, I know where you all live!!

 

Even from my days at sea, ships were always female. From the old days when women onboard were considered bad luck, you know the old jealous lady routine. Another point was that usually the ship would be awkward, difficult to maintain, expensive to run (sorry, Maffi, about opening old wounds again!). Men are never that expensive or difficult.

 

Therefore - all boats are female. QED

 

(dons hard hat, flack jacket and hides in fox hole) - incoming!!!!!!

[Moley]

I've now got some mains lighting onboard so I can continue to paint and pamper in the evenings.

 

So I'm spending all my money on her and doing all the work she needs in the forlorn hope that one day my efforts might be rewarded. As Dave says - QED.

 

Mole. (also ducking)

 

PS: I might use the substances Gaggle's on about (if I knew where to get 'em), but for now I've added red oxide primer and Hammerite to my bitumen cocktail

 

"If I'd have known I could get this high I'd have put in a flight plan,

Alert aircraft in the area - watch out for me

Cos this is damn good s**t we've got here and smoking

Damn good s**t, whoooeeee!

 

Superman, come down from there, I gotta talk to you,

I think I know just what you're on, 'cos look I got some too.."

(Aus. comic Kevin Bloody Wilson)