Mysoginistic boating?

[sociable_hermit]

Well, we've been out for 9 days - 'we' being my good friend Fiona and I.

 

We've had three run ins with grumpy old men this week. The first was the "Warden" at Fazeley, who I'm prepared to ignore on the basis that he doesn't seem to have a clue.

 

Second was a chap on Nb "Frog in a Bucket" who attempted to overtake us on a corner while Fi was on the tiller, then started beeping his horn, and then when we let him past on the straight he grounded us with his wash, flicked fag ash at Fiona and made some comment about "bloody women drivers".

 

Lastly today in the Branston Lock area we had to come past a row of about 10 moored boats by the pub (can't remember the name). Towards the top end of the line is an overhanging tree which narrows the cut considerably. One boat came the other way and had room to pass the tree and curve round us. We then proceeded at just over tickover but, surprise surprise, met another boat at the tree.

 

The Lady at the front of their boat waved us on, but the Skipper and his mate managed to get their stern deck in the trees and the bow pointing outwards. We scuffed his bows with such force that inside the boat I didn't feel it at all. Nonetheless this led to a stream of invective along the lines of "What do you think you're doing, you f*cking silly bitch?". This warranted a similar reply from me. I said to one of the moored up guys "He was a cheery chappy, wasn't he?" and then he started moaning too - "Well you could have waited rather than trying to barge past!". Now unless you've got some sort of ESP this is just impossible - you'd have to be able to sense what was coming 8 boats back, because there's nowhere to go once you're committed to running alongside the moored boats. And I don't see how tickover is 'barging past'. And I really think it would be helpful if people didn't moor anywhere near the fallen down tree, so that there was some room. But basically we were just unlucky to meet someone else there, and it was a 50/50 thing. But it doesn't really matter, does it? So why the tirade of abuse?

 

And then it clicked. Every time someone has been unduly stroppy it has always been when Fiona is on the tiller. She doesn't handle the boat any differently to the way I do, but I'm sure people think she's a soft target to blame for their own inadequacies. Situations where, if I'd been handling the boat, it would have been a shrug of the shoulders and a "Never mind, mate" suddenly become major ego situations just because a girl is involved.

 

So, why is this?

 

And does it happen a lot?

 

It's certainly tainted our holiday experience and I wonder whether it's always like this.

[Heffalump]

It's grumpy bastid men wot don't like making a tit of themselves infront of wimmins, so feel the need to put them down.

 

Tell them to piss off and carry on your way, giving them a nudge with the hull if necessary, then forget. People like that aren't worth much more than a casual flick of the Vs

[CanalWalker]

how old were these grumpy old men?

[Guest]

It's grumpy bastid men wot don't like making a tit of themselves infront of wimmins, so feel the need to put them down.

 

Tell them to piss off and carry on your way, giving them a nudge with the hull if necessary, then forget. People like that aren't worth much more than a casual flick of the Vs

 

Or you could have just lamped the t**t.....

[Nickhlx]

Not a pleasant experience for her though, all the same !

 

I sympathise - you wouldn't get that response from me and hope he meets a bigger boat than him one day - preferably with an even nastier bloke in a widebeam, near the end of a tunnel, so he has to reverse the whole tunnel length ...

 

Nick

[Chris Pink]

Or you could have just lamped the t**t.....

 

nice bit of violence - cure for everything eh, Mr G?

 

Isn't that every bit as bad the behaviour that is the subject of this topic?

Edited September 13, 2009 by Chris Pink

[Heffalump]

Or you could have just lamped the t**t.....

 

Ahahah, I'm only little though, I have to settle for being snidey and sarcastic from afar

[Guest]

nice bit of violence - cure for everything eh, Mr G?

 

Isn't that every bit as bad the behaviour that is the subject of this topic?

 

 

Dear dear me...

 

I was joking Mr P....

 

Sorry you didn't get the humour.

[tomsk]

 

Dear dear me...

 

I was joking Mr P....

 

Sorry you didn't get the humour.

 

 

Take it outside girls!

[Guest]

Take it outside girls!

 

I'd prefer to keep it inside if that's OK....

[Heffalump]

Take it outside girls!

 

ooerr

[Guest]

ooerr

 

Hang on I've left me hand bag...

[tomsk]

I think I saw Mr Pink dancing 'round it!

[Guest]

I think I saw Mr Pink dancing 'round it!

 

[black]

if you see a bully in action they'll always pick on what they think is a a soft target. hence why they had a go at fiona and not you.

if she was a bloke of smaller stature than yourself she'd still get picked on. but if the bully thinks he's going to get thumped he'll back off.

[mayalld]

It's grumpy bastid men wot don't like making a tit of themselves infront of wimmins, so feel the need to put them down.

 

Tell them to piss off and carry on your way, giving them a nudge with the hull if necessary, then forget. People like that aren't worth much more than a casual flick of the Vs

 

Quite so!

 

Let me tell you a story....

 

A couple of years ago, we ventured around the Cheshire Ring with another boat from Warble Wharf (no, not Kiki, let us call them Sue and Graham), and some relations of theirs.

 

All went well until we got to Lower Thurlwood Lock on the T&M, going up.

 

Two of us were just setting into the locks to ascend, and the third boat was waiting below, when our nemesis arrived, also going up.

 

There was an immediate ambience of irritation that they should find their progress so impaired by other boats, but nothing was said.

 

Graham (from the other boat set off for the next lock (the next lock up isn't paired) to start preparing it. I dealt with the top end of both locks, to get Bev and Sue on their way, before going to set back one lock for the third boat in our party.

 

The new arrival launched themselves upon turning the other lock back with gusto, and once the boats were in, wound the top paddles as if possessed! This produced some rather florid language from the wife of new arrival as she saw half the crockery smash to the floor.

 

However, his objective was achieved, and the overtook out third boat.

 

I wandered up to the next lock, where our boat was already nearly up, and immediately set back for our friends boat.

 

Our new companion was clearly now livid that even breaking half his crockery hadn't got him a clear run, but still said nothing.

 

It was approaching lunchtime, so I signalled to Bev that we'd tie up for half an hour above this lock. Sue came up the lock, and tied up behind our boat.

 

Graham and I both waited for the interloper to go thorugh, so we could lock the third boat through. They were mob handed, and there was no part of the lock we could have assisted with, but they participated in the usual lockside chit-chat, clearly holding in their rage.

 

Off they went, and we set back and locked the third boat through for lunch.

 

It was only when we arrived at the two lead boats (both with lady steerers) that we discovered what had happened.

 

Apparently, as the interloper had passed them chatting having moored up, he let forth a foul-mouthed torrent of abuse that boats aren't allowed to move around in groups, and that boats should be going through these locks "like a sausage machine".

 

It seems that the spineless low-life didn't have the guts to express his views when stopped in a lock with all the men standing around, but was quite happy to shout abuse from a safe distance at the ladies when they were fairly sure that we were stopping for a while.

[tomsk]

I trust you took them out with your 'Lawgiver'?

[mayalld]

I trust you took them out with your 'Lawgiver'?

 

No, I regret to say that I behaved childishly.

 

A few hours later, there was our friend, taking on water at Red Bull Yard (or rather,sat with a hose in the tank on the WP at Red Bull, I suspect it wasn't running).

 

As we passed, I sounded the horn, and shouted, "come on, slackers, you should be through these locks like a sausage machine"

 

(Well WE all thought it was funny at the time).

[Odana]

And the other side of the coin is the smarmy 'oooh, doesn't she do that well!' type comments when I do something amazingly skilful like, say, enter a ship-sized lock without touching the sides.

 

It is VERY important to remember and accept that if a woman messes up a manoeuvre it's cos she's a woman and as such can't steer. If a man messes up the same manoeuvre, its 'the wind'.

[TheWilk]

Can't say I've had much bother at all as a singlehanded female, but the male boatmasters on the trip boat I work on get a lot of stick... Very often from wives while hubby is at the wheel, staring straight ahead like nothing is happening!

 

Happened yesterday actually, we were told we were going to get reported to BW for stopping on the aqueduct. It was beautiful because we were on a BW sponsored trip with about 5 of their staff on board including the woman at the end of the complaints line!

 

Oops, bit of gender treachery there...

[steelaway]

Well, we've been out for 9 days - 'we' being my good friend Fiona and I.

 

We've had three run ins with grumpy old men this week. The first was the "Warden" at Fazeley, who I'm prepared to ignore on the basis that he doesn't seem to have a clue.

 

Second was a chap on Nb "Frog in a Bucket" who attempted to overtake us on a corner while Fi was on the tiller, then started beeping his horn, and then when we let him past on the straight he grounded us with his wash, flicked fag ash at Fiona and made some comment about "bloody women drivers".

 

Lastly today in the Branston Lock area we had to come past a row of about 10 moored boats by the pub (can't remember the name). Towards the top end of the line is an overhanging tree which narrows the cut considerably. One boat came the other way and had room to pass the tree and curve round us. We then proceeded at just over tickover but, surprise surprise, met another boat at the tree.

 

The Lady at the front of their boat waved us on, but the Skipper and his mate managed to get their stern deck in the trees and the bow pointing outwards. We scuffed his bows with such force that inside the boat I didn't feel it at all. Nonetheless this led to a stream of invective along the lines of "What do you think you're doing, you f*cking silly bitch?". This warranted a similar reply from me. I said to one of the moored up guys "He was a cheery chappy, wasn't he?" and then he started moaning too - "Well you could have waited rather than trying to barge past!". Now unless you've got some sort of ESP this is just impossible - you'd have to be able to sense what was coming 8 boats back, because there's nowhere to go once you're committed to running alongside the moored boats. And I don't see how tickover is 'barging past'. And I really think it would be helpful if people didn't moor anywhere near the fallen down tree, so that there was some room. But basically we were just unlucky to meet someone else there, and it was a 50/50 thing. But it doesn't really matter, does it? So why the tirade of abuse?

 

And then it clicked. Every time someone has been unduly stroppy it has always been when Fiona is on the tiller. She doesn't handle the boat any differently to the way I do, but I'm sure people think she's a soft target to blame for their own inadequacies. Situations where, if I'd been handling the boat, it would have been a shrug of the shoulders and a "Never mind, mate" suddenly become major ego situations just because a girl is involved.

 

So, why is this?

 

And does it happen a lot?

 

It's certainly tainted our holiday experience and I wonder whether it's always like this.

 

 

 

 

Why didn't the guy in the first boat warn you there was another boat right behind, it would have given you a chance to stop or aleast aviod the bump

It also annoys me mightly at blind briges when there is two boats travelling close behind each other and I get no warning from the lead boat.

 

Alex

[DavidUK]

if you see a bully in action they'll always pick on what they think is a a soft target. hence why they had a go at fiona and not you.

if she was a bloke of smaller stature than yourself she'd still get picked on. but if the bully thinks he's going to get thumped he'll back off.

 

 

Exactly. If a man had spoken to a woman with me like that (even if she was in the wrong) I'd've insisted on an instant apology in order to extract himself from the difficulty he now found himself!! But then I'm a boxing trainer so lucky enough to back myself. I realise that not everyone has the same confidence in themselves, but rest assured that such unpleasant people will, at some point, say the wrong thing at the wrong time

[Heffalump]

No, I regret to say that I behaved childishly.

 

A few hours later, there was our friend, taking on water at Red Bull Yard (or rather,sat with a hose in the tank on the WP at Red Bull, I suspect it wasn't running).

 

As we passed, I sounded the horn, and shouted, "come on, slackers, you should be through these locks like a sausage machine"

 

(Well WE all thought it was funny at the time).

 

 

That's brilliant!! I hope you'd say the same thing again!!

[mayalld]

That's brilliant!! I hope you'd say the same thing again!!

 

I would.

[Chertsey]

Exactly. If a man had spoken to a woman with me like that (even if she was in the wrong) I'd've insisted on an instant apology in order to extract himself from the difficulty he now found himself!! But then I'm a boxing trainer so lucky enough to back myself. I realise that not everyone has the same confidence in themselves, but rest assured that such unpleasant people will, at some point, say the wrong thing at the wrong time

Well I hope I'd never expect a man to wade in on my behalf if someone's rude to me.

 

I remember getting some stick from some youths once at Banbury, standard sexist stuff. Basically I told them to sod off back to their mums and then ignored them. Turned round from setting the lock to find OH chatting away to the ringleader. Bursting with silent rage, I asked him what he thought he was playing at, consorting with the enemy. No, no he said, you've got it all wrong, I'd just got him to apologise! Apologise to HIM, for being rude to ME!

 

Now, that's sexism.