MissMax

Cheeky bunch of boaters (Mr Phill is going to get a talking to when he fist to bed) I'll have you know Mr Enfield. I have two BMW keys and one of those T-keys (I do take notice.....sometimes) Question about bridges Arrived at bridge (near it) 181 but the handle is on the wrong side. Can I stop in a mooring spot that boats go to for bridge use and wait ? Other wise I have to wait round the corner as there is a floating shed close to the mooring spot and two more boats spaced out in front of me. I want to get past Snaygill boats before the rain starts. The next few days for weather looks very wet PS I'm by the Balti King by the way, only stopped here due to starting off in a T-shirt and being blooming frozen (sure bits fell off)

Thanks chaps I'll have it bound in Bitumen with 'Pop-ups' on every other page (in 3D). I was up at four (empty dog) filled up my water bottles, emptied loo (that room stinkkkks) and tidied up and it's still far too dark to set sail Who stole the sunlight! Blooming Brezit is responsible for this New Dark age that has fallen across the earth. I vote we start human sacrifices in order to return to the light. (We can start with those Marmite gobblers)

That's fantastic news. Going to do electrics and engine with them next year. Courses look very cheap for what they are offering and the knowledge that can be gained

Sorry to butt in. The RCR course, can I moor near the office to do the courses? Thank you

Worried about getting stuck at a bridge if I went lurking at Leeds. Promise soon as shut off are done, I'll stalk you ( but not in a weird way)

Was going to cruise up to Aldi Snaigill way then come back to Skipton for winter as the IRA has sold me a spot from 1st November to 31stMarch. This way Pennine boats can sort my boat out and fit my solar panels and better alternator. I'm going to get up to the West Midlands when the weather and the shut offs sort themselves out and offer to make Dave-P boat just like mine Should be a Pro just like Nightwatch by the time summer comes

Are you feeling better?

Boats been reserved. Just past the foot bridge pointing towards Aldi. Going to do me washing and buts then in the morning I'll be getting out of dodge. Not being rude but when are you lot going to start taking responsibility for my boat!? I'll have words with the manager if you lot keep shirking your duties Grrrrr

I'm near the electric bridge. Want to be parked near the Elsan loo area as I'm moving out of Skipton tomorrow and heading towards Aldi

? I don't understand. Do I use the key or do I need to use a hammer ( fingers crossed someone says hammer) PS Anyone in Skipton good at reversing ?

Another question please Going lurking on Friday as Thursday need to wash the mountain of stinky stuff I have hoarded (if you squint your eyes, tilt your head then inhale it looks like Dame Edna). I'm going to head towards Leeds (slowly) what happens when I get back to Skipton and there are no Mooring spots when I return? Do I just wait till night and release a boat that has no permit Not that I would do such a thing (after posting about it on the Internet )

Post where you want to go, someone may know the area

Mines makes no sense whatsoever! I'm sure the grownup will be along to explain the pros and cons. I just have nothing but pure undiluted hate for mine

I gave the bricks away Now Santa will wedge Cuthound down my chimney (Mmmm Bisto)

Blooming worried now after reading your post!!! Found the bricks. They won't fit

Well with language like that! (Storms off in a huff) (Runs back) Do I do it when it's hot or cold ?

Stove still smells like fried eggs when it gets hot Quick Radiator question chaps and man chaps My radiators are upside down (i dont know why) the pipes that take the water in from the stove are blooming hot but the radiators are just blah! i pulled the knob off that leads the water into the radiators off as it just spun around doing nothing. Do i turn it with a thingy to let the hot water in or leave it and let a grown up sort it out. The boat is hot anyway just wanted the radiators to do a grown up job.. The knob with the temp says five but that is at the bottom which is stone cold. Thank you PS Look forward to the wedding

I feel like a big grown up girl (maybe that explains the voice and stubble) I want to send a great big hug to Mr Enfield for telling me about CRT accepting payments from hosing benefits for mooring fees. CRT are sending proof to Pennine Boats for me Sorry Cuthound I think there was some kind of mix up! Who's kidneys do I have in this cooler chest full of Finders frozen pancakes? Think you should look to see if any of your staff are missing.... (Or in a bathtub) I'm going to head towards Aldi Snaigill way Friday till November than (fingers crossed) should have enough money to get more boat work done. Blooming eclipse boat is hot again maybe because it is level now as I filled up the water in the tank so pipes Are doing that 'Downward thingy' . Friday I should or may find out if the engine is heating the water and wit-nots ( that's a technical word so there) I don't think it was a good idea posting my boat details online. Now everyone will know where I am lurking and hide Could you lot promise to pretend you don't recognise my boat when I pass your way, give you half a fluffy Jammie Dodger if you do PS just realised I've been washing my clothes with toilet cleaner for over a month!

I'm polishing my pom-poms in anticipation

Would have posted sooner but NIGHTWATCH (yeah him Grrr) left me to a fate worse than liver and onions (goes to his profile page and shakes fist) I don't suppose he mentioned when he was telling everyone to be nice to your frendly internet/canal boat weirdo that he laughed while i was rolling my trouser leg up in fear! See El Chupacabra that attached itself to my cats face (deiced that the cat did not catch it and bring it onboard as cats don't do that type of stuff) It was eighty feet mooseive and breathed fire. It launched itself under the cooker and started to follow out its evil plan to build a device that would implode my boat causing everything within five miles to get sucked into my hole! I of course pleaded with Mr Nightwatch to hop on his Nightwatch jetski and get to the Nightwatch helicopter pad (on his Nightwatch wide beam) But he said he promised to take his wife (who is beautiful, radiant,smart kind and bluebirds cook her breakfast in the morning) to the Oprah (which is in his underground cave on his Nightwatch Island. It was trying to get out and was using the most unsuitable language (i was shocked) Poor cat was so traumatized it went under the duvet and wouldn't come out The (swear she's adopted) dog was absolutely no help Sending Nightwatch to Coventry is to good for him, send him to Birmingham Grrrrrr PS Did He just call me fat! 'Keep your chins up!" Going to dress him up like Princess Lea and chain him to my engine (that'll teach him) I like being a weirdo makes me feel warm and fuzzy from my ankles to my belly button (ignore my palms) PS About winter mooring and the boat thing Went to Pennine boats to get Anti Freeze , fuel, gas, coal. They had to drain my cooler heady thingy as it only had water inside it in order to mix the anti freeze correctly (which was fine by me) all of this (fuel up to the rim) cost around £140 which is far to cheap for all the work that he did (raidiators are working again ) He did something to the engine as he said the coolent or something was being diverted away from something so the engine wasn't heating anything so that may or may not produce hot water but i will find out some time this week when i go lurking. My alternator is to small for the amount of batteries i have so instead of me buying new ones it may be better just to get a new alternatro. He said next time i am passing he will test the batteries beforehand so i will know what is best (i love Pennine Boats -X- ) Talked to CRT and i am staying between bridge 179 and 177 from November to March so in the mean time i am going lurking around the canal. The place that i planned to moor at (begins with B sorry dog ate my map ) never gave me any confirmation so it is best to stay close and get the boat fixed by really nice people than take my chance with strangers and risk being in a poor location for water and wot-nots. CRT emailed my permit and it's paid via direct debit from my account each month (£216) I know i am not currently sailing the high seas at the moment but i plan on going off on a wonder till November and parking up for a bit while the boat gets tinkerd with, this way i will save cash in the long run and i know i can get water and loo bits done PS Did i mention i got chased by a rabbit while walking the dog Had to pick the dog up and run away as the rabbit meant business and it was out for vengeance. (Please note i ran away very bravely ) PS Finished carpeting and trimming the lino and painting (ran out of paint and money.....stupid boat )

Wonderd why the GPS device on Nightwatch wasn't working properly. Airport security must have removed it How do all of you (most of you) know all these boaty things off by heart? Nothing makes sense on a boat, nothing behaves like it's supposed to (or like the magazines say) Mr Nightwatch is sitting on some beach with the love of his life drinking Ribena from a coconut while I'm here in Blighty checking my torches still work and doing my hourly spider search If I'm suffering, so should everyone else (out of sympathy) The Tescos Sweet and Sour chicken with egg fried rice that I had for breakfast has come back to haunt me. I may not be long for this world (it came out my nose). I'm going to curl up with a bucket and hope nothing else happens

Zeus won't eat me. I'm 90% Bitumen

Your pets have their own boat! Please adopt me Gorgeous pups