Tony1

To be fair it was @Ex Brummie 's idea, but it looks a decent visual deterrent at least. Will it be proof against magnetman's brutal southern colleagues? Only time will tell.... Haha, funny you should say that, I lost one of the original M4 machine screws over the stern when I was replacing it last night! Why do they keep filling these bloody canals with muddy water? You can never find anything once it goes overboard (unless you're filming a youtube video). Thanks Brian, I did look at these, but I'm concerned they would stick their pipe in, find a blockage, and try to ram the pipe down anyway, or ram something else down to clear the blockage. Its a good idea, but tbh I prefer to keep the tube free of obstruction if possible. Once a year or so, I insert a hard plastic tube and suck out a few hundred ml of fuel off the bottom of the tank, to see how clean (or otherwise) it is down there, and if there's any obvious diesel bug.

Yes, I think it would probably be OK for some areas (eg the Llangollen, or around Nantwich/Middlewich maybe). And its OK for when I'm generally around, as you say. But if I left the boat somewhere a bit iffy for a night or two, I think it would pretty easy for a scrote to prise the eyebolts loose, or break them. I'm crap at DIY so I'll end up making a mess of the whole area if I do much more ironmongery work, so at the moment I'm leaning towards the £75 lock. Its a lot of money for an event that seems to only happen very rarely, but I'm heading further south, and I'm worried that the people darn sarf aren't going to be civilised like wot us scousers are 🤣

Its a cheap padlock from Amazon (I'm guessing fuel thieves wont be expert lock pickers like some bike thieves are), but its adjustable. The shackle part of it was originally much longer but I ground off a few inches, to allow me to get the shackle through both eyebolts. I also had to grind down a bit of the outer ring in order to get the shackle down at a low enough angle that it would pass through the eyebolts, so that's not ideal. But I can tidy that up and paint it, and it wont be too noticeable. It is locked in the pic, but one of the two arms of the shackle is a bit shorter, and goes only part way through the padlock - if I left that arm any longer, I couldnt get it through there. The diameter of the outer ring is only about 160mm, and the cap is about 80mm wide, so there's very little room to fit in a long shackle without some more grinding away of the outer ring. I'll be passing Braunston in a week or so, and I'll decide then whether to invest in a more secure lock, or take a chance on this one, as its more of a visual/casual deterrent.

Just a quick update, I've put in two M4 eyebolts as suggested by ex-brummie, and a padlock. Its not a very strong setup- the eyebolts I've used seem quite thin, and it could be smashed off with a hammer fairly quickly. The hope is that if approached in the dark and with a need to work in silence, the thieves will be deterred enough to give up. I'm still pondering something stronger, using M6 or M8 bolts set into the deck, but you dont have a lot of wiggle room in the centre of the raised steel ring, and I might still go for the Midland Chandlers lock contraption, as extra protection if an attempt is made whilst the boat is left unattended for a few hours or overnight. But at least for now, I have something better than a cap that just unscrews.

I was envisioning this sort of thing- the wider hole might give a bit more leeway to fit the padlock through. One slight snag is the current screws are countersunk, and it doesnt look look like it'll be easy to find countersunk eyebolts. So the bolts might have to sit on top of the filler rim, and it wont be quite so neat a fit, but it will work as a great visual deterrent. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Leliafleury-Shoulder-Stainless-Engineering-Equipment/dp/B0D5Y3696D/ref=sr_1_50?crid=3DJ71WGYJR89D&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.LVTP-VwRXYFh4Pktp55nFcq8QVElYsUfJj85WoxnkXPFfaQ9mHhdX0iQFtoGpT_5yC2Iv0HePun6khdqgN4Lu1HOorKMARo6208XUCBnPIOM8MPHqXiYdXiP7Jl5yE3jMh2xwCcq3n13r7lfjIxBXGGt8vXE2aH6KV1YN10UusrSiUIoikcuyYaPQ3MxA67xPaaF6PpX943CEi3CqWzwzW4QFglK6xCPB8xzqC7tfuZul_16nluRRsfi75S4IXOkOobTZjBSpajKp7vP-MYyJm1XVg1g4n4y07eM9p0VHQQouBpSSOHAOA6w75qKWtl-ysCr4NCc2OHTLUxWgeQDXl71FhTOhYq0NFViTQiJ09Q0QeJEHhDFk4_J2SMQ21Jgj0nhpS-uBSsEtjoI_RUVoDnXzulpDW54U_4hLGOrPM_idiYuk-dtcRh-JlneKgPb.fT7bv0S_3FS8WHPs_rclQa61b71_imAnUghYUC8-lC8&dib_tag=se&keywords=m4+eye+bolt+countersunk&nsdOptOutParam=true&qid=1734284477&sprefix=m4+eye+bolt+countersunk%2Caps%2C146&sr=8-50

That's a cracking idea, thanks very much. Two M4 eyebolts and a weatherproof padlock, job done. Doesnt have to be strong (for most of them anyway)- they'll see a padlock and just move on. Another option for more strength would an M8 eyebolt. You'd have to drill and tap a new M8 thread into the deck on either side of the filler cap, so its not my first choice unless the M4 ones get ripped out.

I previously had a BMV712 set up as Nick describes (and set up with much help from him), and it does work very well, as long as you recalibrate every few weeks to keep the SoC calculation accurate. I've now moved to managing the charging based on the bulk charging voltage as set in the MPPT (I have two victron 100/50's). I find that if I set the bulk charging voltage to about 13.9v, the batteries will get to about 85-90% full by the time the battery reaches the bulk charging voltage. And at that time the MPPT goes into float, which effectively stops the charging. (I set the float voltage to 12.5v.) The slight issue with managing the charge based on bulk (and absorption) voltages is that they dont always get the batteries charged to an exact SoC. For example, if I'm charging at say 100 amps, that seems to push the battery voltage up quicker than if I charge at 15 amps. The result of that seems to be that when charging at a high current, the batteries can each 13.9v when they are only 75% full. Whereas if I charge at 15 amps, they seem to get to 90% and more before they reach the bulk charging voltage of 13.9v, (which I think triggers the MPPT to go into float. So you can manage the MPPT charging based on setting the bulk charging voltage to an appropriate level so the batteries reach 85% SoC before going into float. Or if you want the batteries to get full, you can set the bulk charge voltage to 14.4v. The SoC system is more accurate in terms of making sure the batteries get to an exact SoC before charging stops, I think I changed over to using voltage because I needed the BMV712 for something else! Both methods of controlling the charge will work in parallel, so if the batteries reach the MPPTs bulk charging voltage (say 14.0v), that will switch the MPPT to float anyway and the charging stops- and that will happen even if you haven't yet reached your target SoC. And of course the converse might happen, with the BMV712 swtiching off the MPPT before it reaches the bulk charging voltage. It all depends on the values you enter for the target SoC, and the bulk charge voltage. In my case I set the bulk charge voltage to 14.4v, and the target SoC to 85%, so in my case the BMV712 always cut in first, and switched off the MPPT at 85% SoC, and the battery voltage at that SoC was always well below 14.4v, so the MPPT never went into float mode in my setup.

My guess is the type of people who nick diesel probably do it regularly, and they'd probably be more than happy to use a hand pump to suck out the fuel, if its below the waterline and cant be siphoned. A nearby boater told me two lads in kayaks were spotted nicking fuel in the wee hours some weeks ago, towing a tender with a big barrel of some sort to hold the fuel. If it was a casual or passing thief without a pump, then they probably took some (down to the waterline) somewhere on the Ashby, and then I ran out sooner than expected at Rugby. Either way, I think something to deter them and/or slow them down might be a good idea going forwards. I did hear a splashing of paddles and muttered voices about 1am maybe 6 or 7 nights ago, but I thought it was just hard core kayakers. The absence of lights should have been an indication they were not on a pleasure trip. But I only ran out (if I'm right) a few days later the theft - so they very kindly left me enough dregs to run the engine for maybe 8 hours or so. No harm seems to have come to the engine from sucking up the dregs (touch wood). As with bike thefts, a determined thief with the right tools will usually steal their target regardless of locks, but I personally think most fuel thieves will be semi-opportunistic types, and most thefts would be done at night- at least in a busy mooring spot (which it is). So if they cant get into your fuel tank quickly and quietly, they'll probably just move on to the next boat. A grinder would be fine if its a boat moored alone in a quiet spot, but not where I am at the moment.

I really like the Midlands, and the beer prices aren't too bad, but I think the accent is a bit odd. The superstar Irish actor Cillian Murphy does a marvellous brummie accent. Why cant the actual brummies talk more like him? Is that the SS Great Britain? It looks like something Brunel might have made. Either way, I dont have access to a steel foundry, so I'm going to struggle to recreate that masterpiece! Mine has a raised steel ring about 7 inches diameter around the filler hole, like the one in Chris Lowe's pic above. BUT my fuel cap is flat and almost flush to the deck- it doesnt have a upwards protruding screw-threaded tube like the one in their product website. I'll post a pic of it tomorrow, because if I go out now the rain will dissolve me. And I never go out in slippers.

I hadnt even considered that, but yes - I bet the scrotes have. I would work on the theory that if the fuel cap is locked, there's a good chance they'll just move on to the next boat rather than faff around. But who really knows? Cheers Brain, that looks a cracking idea. I'll measure the ring tomorrow and see if I can find a padlock long enough. If its enough to slow them down, my guess is that its enough to stop them bothering.

Surely budweiser would only be used by a self respecting GRP driver to clean fuel lines? The good stuff (antifreeze, absinthe etc) would normally be kept in a dedicated 'drinking' fridge within the servants quarters.

Alas, I fear that our friends in the constabulary would not be in the least interested in some grainy IR footage of a couple of scrotes in kayaks towing a tender with a fuel barrel in it (which I understand was, at one time, the modus operandi of the local thieves in Rugby). Our overstretched police force have lots of very wealthy folks that they need to protect. Any efforts they might make on our behalf are, I fear, entirely ceremonial.

I love the thinking there, but there is a teeny snag-ette. Which is that there are very few objects that float about on the canals that are the same size as a narrowboat. But nonetheless, I am inspired. I wonder.. if I were to disguise my boat as a GRP, and rip the pram hood to shreds (it doesnt have that far to go, to be fair) - and then fit an entirely decorative outboard motor.... It could take on the outwards appearance of a large GRP vessel. Since I'm unspeakably scruffy anyway, I wouldn't have to dress down at all to suit a GRP boat. The real issue is the booze. I've heard the UK GRP Owners Club insist on drinking two bottles of vodka before lunch. No way am I cutting down to two bottles.

Yes, thats my type. I think the rear wall of the tank is the actual rear hull of the boat. My impression is its the most common arrangement, although given the wacky world of narrowboats, there are bound to be a few unusual designs out there. And there are the traditional designs of course, which use live dolphins to blow fuel from the tank into the engine. So I'm told.

A plasma cutter? My ideal world solution wouldn't require the services of 'Q' to build it- although I might need James Bond to help guard the diesel. But as a few have said, most boats are sat there with about £200 worth of fuel that you can can get at by unscrewing a cap. We need to adapt to the scrote-infested world we live in, sadly.

I dont actually know the capacity but I think my tank holds maybe 100-130 litres, so if they got half of it, thats maybe 60 litres at about £1.30? Anyway, its a lot. But the thing is, its never happened before. But you know what? I got soft. I got soft in my old age, and those lousy bums got me. (Sorry, I'm reading a Raymond Chandler novel, and I think its getting to me).

What impresses me most is that you can instantly magic up a photo of a grate. I went looking for a free image I could use a few weeks ago, and ended up wasting a massive of time (and seeing many images I'd rather not have seen).

I'm deffo getting something, I think these Orcish devils must be everywhere in the south, and I'll be damned if they're getting my diesel again. I reckon most times they dont take the lot, so that people aren't totally sure if they're been siphoned or not. That way they can carry on indefinitely in their home area.

As long as you weren't singing. You sound worse than a strangled frog these days old fellow. No offence intended, obvs. You do jolly well for a chap from the neolithic. ETA- sincere apologies Sir Rod. My fuel anguish has done nothing for my manners this evening. I'm actually a great admirer.

Alas- smugness is a terrible sin, my son. Of course! I shall pass on your theory to Trotter and his team. If you dont mind me saying old chap, you do seem to know rather a lot about this particular crime. Where were you on the night of the 10th?

In my research I actually see a plasticky thing with about 8 arms that sits inside the filler pipe and stops a siphon hose going in there, but my worry would be they'd think it was jammed on an edge or something, and start ramming it in as hard as possible. Ideally I'd like a solution that acts as a visual deterrent. Thats the kind of thing I think will do the job, but something I can screw into the circular steel lip thing. This is when I wish I hadn't pi**ed about the whole time in metalwork class.

Easy for you to say, sat there in your big mansion with - who is it this month? But cunning as your idea is, I fear today's thieves are a match for it. The cap in question is right at the back of the stern deck, in the place where 99 out of 100 boats have a diesel filler. I fear the blighters may see through the subterfuge.

And assuming its you driving, where was the Owl?

I think I may have been the victim of a particularly vicious siphoning a few days ago. It happened, if it happened at all, during our last attractively-named storm (and why do they never use Scots names for them? But that's another discussion). If memory serves (and to be fair, it usually doesn't) I should have about half a tank of diesel left, but a few days ago I started the engine to do a bit of charging, and a few minutes later it spluttered and died. I dipped the fuel tank with my high-tech wooden dowel, and lo and behold, it was empty. Obviously I will be contacting Inspector Trotter of the Yard, who will doubtless be here within the hour with a crack team of his finest peelers. But the in the meantime, I am pondering some sort of anti-theft device. Midland Chandlers do a steel contraption that looks like it will fit nicely, and I should be passing by there soon, so I'm in for a jolly good fleecing anyway. But £75 does seem a lot, really. https://www.midlandchandlers.co.uk/products/ag-fuel-filler-locking-kit-ad-126?srsltid=AfmBOopY87JCmEC8uHHzFzwZ9DYy1ATlvZ3lGTzwjp4n43eAzf_xoSlv I've also seen this thing on ebay which I like the look of: https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/282742313873?_skw=Locking+Cap+Deck+Filler&itmmeta=01JF0EMPV1A18JZCRF0CHHTRCS&hash=item41d4c15391:g:btoAAOSwNSxVAhXI&itmprp=enc%3AAQAJAAAA8HoV3kP08IDx%2BKZ9MfhVJKn2iFtzUdsp9EiS1Sze1cEOUxEbR4i9ujjaRVtgoUtyWDgbhvF%2BW6%2Fa6%2BOy7KDMTq60TH2p%2FjWo9fPfsevm5%2FjFH3nM%2FH4I0Zv6qB63eTmfNxaQekrQlaMDWtEC73ftsUHUZV7%2Be1PJQ0JdqHkZ57DCWewj4TkeSKjlpHMuYKIFZakjdvL71YXtFTBmbC3ok4FMbR3UKAeCBP%2FIT86BBShvzXWIeeMxfUvQzt87R6c9YJksvFse73R%2FX0ENaYOiKkTNGKt2pcnfwi76KVjdDS7IgztdSeTnpHHkn1IbQwLukw%3D%3D|tkp%3ABFBMzu3Sjvhk But I was rather hoping there was a cheap option, something like a hasp that closes over the circular raised lip that surrounds the filler hole, and can be padlocked. I've seen them about, but as I was in the posh Northwest, I never needed one. Now that I'm heading for the southern badlands, I think I might need to padlock my lunch to the deck in case that gets stolen. They told me no good would come from mixing with southerners. They all talk like Orcs in Lord of the Rings. What's that about?

There are other odd times you need or want to get on the roof. Occasionally there's a certain type or layout of lock where I find the easiest option to reach the lock ladder via the roof (bear in mind my solar panels are 1m wide so I prefer not to walk alongside them if I can avoid it, as its a narrow space to tread). But there are many other occasions. E.g. I always take the chimney off before I go cruising. And after I moor, I need to put it back on. If the chimney flue is on the offside, I need to reach across the roof of the boat to put the chimney back on. And the quickest/easiest way for me to reach the other side of the roof do it is to use one of those small folding steps to get a leg up. Likewise if you need to rearrange some bags of coal that are on the 'offside' of the roof, or you want to tweak the solar panel mounting in some way, or to do a paint touch-up job, etc. So for me its worth having a folding step on each side, near to the bow. I also have a larger trucker-style folding step at the stern, attached to the rear cabin wall. Its not that often I need access to the roof, but its really handy to have steps. I haven't seen one yet that doesnt need fixing though. That said, its worth learning how to drill through steel plate and tap a thread out to hold a bolt, because its an easy skill t learn even for a useless DIY clown like me, and it comes in handy periodically.