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Jennifer McM

Waterway Songs

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Every now and again I fall upon a website, just like a rabbit hole, that I can't get out of....  this website is one of them. 

 

Some of the lyrics are hilarious, and some are very touching: "Bosley in the Rain", "Bottom Blacking is Boring"...

 

"Call This A Holiday" has such a ring of truth about it 😂 http://www.waterwaysongs.co.uk/sounds/call_this_a_holiday.mp3

 

http://www.waterwaysongs.co.uk/SongMenu.htm

 

Lyrics from "The Grumpy Old Boater"..... (think we've met him! 😂)

 

Water temperature's rising, the oil pressure's low
He's coughing out black smoke wherever he goes
He should service the engine but we daren’t tell him so
For he is a grumpy old boater

Baggy jeans, oily tee-shirt, and scuffed leather boots
An abrasive old misfit, too fond of disputes
For politeness and manners he don’t give two hoots
For he is a grumpy old boater

Irksome and set in misogynous ways
He lives in the past, dreams of long bygone days
An outspoken critic of all he surveys
For he is a grumpy old boater

When boaters greet him he just cuts them dead
Averting his eyes he stares straight ahead
"How do?" and "Good Morning" and are words left unsaid
For he is a grumpy old boater

He'll shout and he'll swear at boats passing by
'Cos he thinks they're too fast and he’ll never see why
He can’t be a candidate for ‘Mr Nice Guy’
For he is a grumpy old boater

Alone on his boat through the long winter storms
He's a churlish hothead when the temperature warms
It's 'Bah Humbug' to summer and those leisure boat swarms
For he is a grumpy old boater

That queue at the locks just couldn't be worse
While stopped does he chat? No, quite the reverse
He'll gripe and he'll groan, he’ll chunter and curse
For he is a grumpy old boater

So take note grumpy boater, you know who you are
On tow-path, afloat, or propping up bar
A cantankerous dipstick who just goes too far
So push off you grumpy old boater

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There's the Eton Boating song, favoured by Rugby clubs:       And we'll all pull together

                                                                                             With our bodies between our knees. ect.

And there's the Russian one. The Vulgar Boatmans song;    Yoho heave ho, ect.

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The poem, ''Casabianca''   The boy stood on the burning deck

                                        Playing a game of cricket

                                        The ball ran up his trouser leg

                                        And hit his middle wicket.

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1 hour ago, Nightwatch said:

I've known a few sea shanties in my past. Perhaps not to be listed here. But they were great. The lobster one is quite good.

That takes me back! Good advice about the dust too.

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6 hours ago, bizzard said:

And there's the Russian one. The Vulgar Boatmans song;    Yoho heave ho, ect.

I was born in Omsk.

Very close to Tomsk.

Where I spent my time

Manufacturing bomsk

 

😀

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13 minutes ago, Victor Vectis said:

I was born in Omsk.

Very close to Tomsk.

Where I spent my time

Manufacturing bomsk

 

😀

Boom Boomski.

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7 hours ago, Nightwatch said:

I've known a few sea shanties in my past. Perhaps not to be listed here. But they were great. The lobster one is quite good.

Oh, Mr Fisherman....!  :D

 

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10th October 2018  7.30pm

Canal based songs with Dusty Miller & Dave Illingworth, & classic popular & blues songs with Rachel & John Brookes.

The Sports ConneXion,       Ryton-on-Dunsmore,  Coventry  CV8 3FL

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Have a listen to Buz Collins, excellent musician and friend sadly missed, where has time gone its 16 years since he left us.

 

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Come all ye dry land sail-i-ars and listen to my song
It's only forty verses and I won't detain you's long
It's all about the adventures of this old Lisburn tar
Who sailed as man before the mast on the good ship Calibar

Now the Calibar was a spanking craft, pitch bottomed for and aft
Her helm, it stuck out far behind and her wheel was a great big shaft
With half a gale to fill her sail, she'd do a knot an hour
She's the fastest craft on the Lagan Canal and she's only one horse power

Now, the captain was a strapping lad and he stood just four foot two
His eyes was red and his nose was green and his cheeks was a prussian blue
He wore a leather medal that he won in the Crimea War
And the captain's wife was the passenger cook on the good ship Calibar

Now, the captain say to me "Me lad, look here, me lad" says he
"Would you's like to be a sail-i-ar and sail the raging sea?
Would you's like to be a sail-i-ar on foreign seas to roll
For we're under orders from Portadown with a half a ton of coal"

It was early next morning, the weather, it being sublime
When passing under the old Queen's Bridge, we heard the Albert's chime
When going along the gaswork straits, a very dangerous part
We ran ahole on a lump of coal that wasn't marked down on the chart

Then all became cunfuse-i-en and the stormy winds did blow
The bos'n slipped on an orange peel, fell into the hold below
"Put on more speed", the captain cried "for we are sorely pressed"
But the engineer from the bank replied "The horse is doing his best"

Then we all fell into the water and we all let out a roar
There was a farmer standing there and he threw us the end of his galloses
And he pulled us all ashore
No more I'll be a sail-i-ar or sail the raging main
And the next time I go to Portadown, I'll go by the bloody train

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On 14/09/2018 at 17:36, Loddon said:

Have a listen to Buz Collins, excellent musician and friend sadly missed, where has time gone its 16 years since he left us.

 

Hi Loddon

The lyrics and partial recordings of Buz's excellent canal songs are included on the Songs of the Inland Waterways website http://www.waterwaysongs.co.uk/

I've not been able to say much about Buz as very little information is available on-line and our paths never crossed. If you were able to provide a short biography I would be more than happy to include it on the site. His work is sadly undervalued. I can be contacted by e-mail through the website.

Thanks

Ian

 

PS the same applies to David Blagrove if anyone out there would like to sum up his life in a paragraph or two. Amongst his many achievements the creation of some canal song 'standards' is often overlooked.

 

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On 13/09/2018 at 12:06, Jennifer McM said:

Every now and again I fall upon a website, just like a rabbit hole, that I can't get out of....  this website is one of them. 

 

Some of the lyrics are hilarious, and some are very touching: "Bosley in the Rain", "Bottom Blacking is Boring"...

 

"Call This A Holiday" has such a ring of truth about it 😂 http://www.waterwaysongs.co.uk/sounds/call_this_a_holiday.mp3

 

http://www.waterwaysongs.co.uk/SongMenu.htm

 


😂

 

As the webmaster of this website (and the author of the four songs you mentioned) I'd just like to say that your comments lifted my spirits considerably. Thank you.

 

ETA More of my songs can be found in full at http://www.mywaterwayworld.co.uk/

Edited by Bugsworth Tippler
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This isn't a waterways song, more briny sea, but it has a lovey traditional folk feel - Johnny Flynn 

 

 

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2 hours ago, Bugsworth Tippler said:

As the webmaster of this website (and the author of the four songs you mentioned) I'd just like to say that your comments lifted my spirits considerably. Thank you.

 

ETA More of my songs can be found in full at http://www.mywaterwayworld.co.uk/

Well you lifted mine.... THANK YOU!

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3 hours ago, Bugsworth Tippler said:

As the webmaster of this website (and the author of the four songs you mentioned) I'd just like to say that your comments lifted my spirits considerably. Thank you.

 

ETA More of my songs can be found in full at http://www.mywaterwayworld.co.uk/

If you ever release you songs on iTunes I would love it if you let us know because I love a copy of your album but I don't do CDs any more. :)

 

ETA there is some one with your name on iTunes but I don't think it's you.

Edited by Tumshie

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Hi Tumshie

If you can't download the SoundCloud versions (some of which I hope to improve on) I'll try to send you mp3 versions. You could send your e-mail address to ian(at)waterwaysongs.co.uk.

I'm not into selling music, most of the CDs I produced were given away!

Ian

 

ETA My SoundCloud channel is called WaterwaySongs

Edited by Bugsworth Tippler

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Hello Again

 

In recent years I've written a couple of dozen songs about the British waterways. They are of variable quality but some seem to be liked and that's the only reward I seek.

These have been uploaded to SoundCloud and I have just managed to alter the settings to make them downloadable. They can be found on SoundCloud by searching for 'WaterwaySongs'.

To download, rather than just listen, you may need to use a SoundCloud downloader such as can be found at
https://9soundclouddownloader.com/

 

The lyrics and chords can be found here : http://www.mywaterwayworld.co.uk/

 

I don't claim to be a singer or a guitarist but I did put some effort into making the words of these songs as good as I could and I would be thrilled if just one of them gained a reasonably wide audience.

 

Nearly three hundred canal themed songs can be found on the website 'Songs of the Inland Waterways' : http://www.waterwaysongs.co.uk/

 

Ian H Bruce
(not to be confused with the professional Scottish folk singer named Ian Bruce)

13 hours ago, Tumshie said:

If you ever release you songs on iTunes I would love it if you let us know because I love a copy of your album but I don't do CDs any more. :)

 

ETA there is some one with your name on iTunes but I don't think it's you.

Hi Tumshie

See above.

Cheers

Ian

Edited by Bugsworth Tippler

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44 minutes ago, Bugsworth Tippler said:

Hello Again

Thank you very much for all your time and effort, I will investigate the links and go from there. I can appreciate your not wanting to go professional, to do so really changes the dynamic of that thing you love, But your songs and your singing is very enjoyable and I'm glad you shared them with us.

 

As for that one song that makes it big I think "The Grumpy Boater" has that  potential 😉

 

Tumsh

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8 hours ago, Tumshie said:

Thank you very much for all your time and effort, I will investigate the links and go from there. I can appreciate your not wanting to go professional, to do so really changes the dynamic of that thing you love, But your songs and your singing is very enjoyable and I'm glad you shared them with us.

 

As for that one song that makes it big I think "The Grumpy Boater" has that  potential 😉

 

Tumsh

It is good to see that the creation of what is sometimes disparagingly called folk music is still alive.

It has obviously struck a chord with some members.

I think the tune for the song in the first post is based on an old English tune,

the original lyric is

When I was out walking down by the seaside,

I met with a young man called Corporal Mcbride,

With our hands in our pockets we walked side by side,

etc,etc..

Basically it's about army recruitment!

Are you bored yet????😎😎😎

 

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