Dangerous Dinnerware

[Russ T]

I was just sitting there reading a book, minding my own business. Mrs. R was in the galley making dinner and setting the table. She placed a couple of glass plates on the wooden tabletop, then crossed the cabin to reach into a cupboard.
Thirty seconds later, there was a deafening crack as one of the plates spontaneously detonated into thousands of tiny, razor-sharp shards, launching shrapnel in every direction across the boat.

To make matters worse, the plates are not alone. We have the matching cups. The whole collection is made of vintage Duralex, and it is ancient.

We are now living in fear for our lives as our crockery actively conspires against us.
Luckily, we had a spare plate. But here I am, tentatively eating my dinner while profoundly concerned that our remaining plates are going to spontaneously explode at any second.

Do plates have an expiration date?

 

Is detonating dinnerware common?

 

Is a suicidal soup bowl going to be the last thing I see?

I am too young to diet.

Advice urgently required before the cereal bowls launch a coup

Edited July 26 by Russ T

[Jen-in-Wellies]

Duralex is a tempered glass. The heat treatment in manufacture that makes it very tough and long lasting, means that when it does let go, it utterly destroys itself and anything/one within the blast radius!

[Russ T]

1 minute ago, Jen-in-Wellies said:

Duralex is a tempered glass. The heat treatment in manufacture that makes it very tough and long lasting, means that when it does let go, it utterly destroys itself and anything/one within the blast radius!

Ok, great. What's the solution then? Issue all my guests with stab vests?

 

It's like playing Russian roulette with my ratatouille.

[mrsmelly]

I was at my mates very posh palatial residence in Oxford last week for lunch. He has lots of large bi fold double glazed windows out onto his garden. One was awaiting replacement as it had gone off in the continuous heat like a cracker. It had held together but crazed as the plastic film I think they have stopped it falling out the frame. 

[Russ T]

5 minutes ago, mrsmelly said:

I was at my mates very posh palatial residence in Oxford last week for lunch. He has lots of large bi fold double glazed windows out onto his garden. One was awaiting replacement as it had gone off in the continuous heat like a cracker. It had held together but crazed as the plastic film I think they have stopped it falling out the frame. 

I've had window glass shatter for no apparent reason before. Weirdly,once when I was even looking at it,but dinner plates is a whole other thing. The bloody thing lept two foot off the table in an attempt for my face.

 

On the plus side, it hasn't spent the last twenty years aggressively exfoliating my face with shrapnel before.However, on the negative side, once is all it takes. A tactical strike doesn't inspire confidence when you happen to be rather fond of your face,as Mrs R is of mine.

[mrsmelly]

1 minute ago, Russ T said:

I've had window glass shatter for no apparent reason before. Weirdly,once when I was even looking at it,but dinner plates is a whole other thing. The bloody thing lept two foot off the table in an attempt for my face.

 

On the plus side, it hasn't spent the last twenty years aggressively exfoliating my face with shrapnel before.However, on the negative side, once is all it takes. A tactical strike doesn't inspire confidence when you happen to be rather fond of your face,as Mrs R is of mine.

Joking aside I would bin em. In 94 in a pub I ran I turned the lights on in the bar and one of the bulbs that hung down at seated head level near the bar stools innstantly went off like a hand grenade, anyone sat there would have got a face full of glass. 

[The History Man]

It’s only a matter of time……………..

 

 

Or dress for dinner. 

 

 

[LadyG]

1 hour ago, Jen-in-Wellies said:

Duralex is a tempered glass. The heat treatment in manufacture that makes it very tough and long lasting, means that when it does let go, it utterly destroys itself and anything/one within the blast radius!

I wonder if he has been puting them in a microwave.

They might well be sixty years old, i remember meeting a lad who was a salesman, when I was at college 

[Russ T]

Just now, LadyG said:

I wonder if he has been puting them in a microwave.

They might well be sixty years old, i remember meeting a lad who was a salesman, when I was at college 

Why don't you ask me?😂

[Jen-in-Wellies]

The factory is still going. If you can sweep up all the shards, perhaps they can put it back together for you?

[Russ T]

14 minutes ago, Jen-in-Wellies said:

The factory is still going. If you can sweep up all the shards, perhaps they can put it back together for you?

Hmmmm. Could work.But if I have even a couple of bits missing,they might send back.a durex instead of a duralex

[system 4-50]

In my early youth, the cry was, "wash your hands for Dinner".  Obviously that was remiss.  It should have been, "get your PPE on for Dinner".

[Bee]

A few years ago I was in an off licence in a particularly dangerous part of Manchester, suddenley a bottle on a shelf exploded with a bang. Being a bit naive I thought how unusual that was. When I looked around the other customer in the shop was on the floor, the shopkeeper behind the weldmesh grille was hiding behind the counter and I was standing there like a lemon. They had assumed it was an armed robbery, Luckily it was just a bottle of something fizzy going pop!

[MtB]

So your posh glass plate smashed?

 

This cracked me up!

 

But more seriously, what a pane for you...

 

 

[Jon57]

32 minutes ago, Russ T said:

Hmmmm. Could work.But if I have even a couple of bits missing,they might send back.a durex instead of a duralex

That should cover it ok

[nicknorman]

2 hours ago, Jen-in-Wellies said:

Duralex is a tempered glass.

Aka bad tempered glass.

[LadyG]

1 hour ago, Russ T said:

Why don't you ask me?😂

Well, what is the answer Rusteeee?

[Russ T]

5 minutes ago, LadyG said:

Well, what is the answer Rusteeee?

Yes,it probably has been in a microwave but not for over a decade 

 

 

New comment.

...

 

 

 

I'm getting the feeling here that you lot aren't taking our near death experience very seriously 

Edited July 26 by Russ T

[LadyG]

Just now, Russ T said:

Yes,it probably has been in a microwave but not for over a decade 

I have a very nice porcelain coffee filter, and was always carefull not to hit it on the kitchen tap, ( they are expensive and not easy to find), but one day, it broke when I was rinsing it, its one of  life's mysteries, the old cheapo coffee mugs last for years, but the nice ones given as a Christmas presents soon end up on the floor, in two pieces.

[MtB]

6 minutes ago, Russ T said:

I'm getting the feeling here that you lot aren't taking our near death experience very seriously 

 

Apologies for our insensitivity. You must be shattered by it.

[Momac]

Possible replacements available 

https://www.thekingdomoftableware.co.uk/products/duralex-lys-shapir-dinner-plate-23cm?variant=54886600704387&country=GB&currency=GBP&utm_medium=product_sync&utm_source=google&utm_content=sag_organic&utm_campaign=sag_organic&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=24022070372&gbraid=0AAAAAp2jo0LzKunExXsuVm4sgNXoUe4mV&gclid=Cj0KCQjw4JbTBhCoARIsALWUaBvu2f5utm9WTfjuzEDVDX7D1fwMmQSTSL4jWsvjZaWP9ID4dJ3f0x0aAiJQEALw_wcB

[Cheese]

1 hour ago, Russ T said:

Why don't you ask me?😂

Well have you?  (Been putting them in an oven / microwave?)  It sounds like thermal shock, which Duralex is much better at resisting than other glass, but not totally immune.

[LadyG]

26 minutes ago, Bee said:

A few years ago I was in an off licence in a particularly dangerous part of Manchester, suddenley a bottle on a shelf exploded with a bang. Being a bit naive I thought how unusual that was. When I looked around the other customer in the shop was on the floor, the shopkeeper behind the weldmesh grille was hiding behind the counter and I was standing there like a lemon. They had assumed it was an armed robbery, Luckily it was just a bottle of something fizzy going pop!

Yep, I sympathise with customer #2, I was sailing single handed somewhere near the Irish Sea when there  was an ear splitting bang, I was on the floor in no time,  it was Concorde!

Edited July 26 by LadyG

[Russ T]

1 minute ago, Cheese said:

Well have you?  (Been putting them in an oven / microwave?)  It sounds like thermal shock, which Duralex is much better at resisting than other glass, but not totally immune.

No. The plate was taken out of  the rack and placed on the table. About 30 seconds later it shattered into pieces with a loud crack and deposited it's remains all over the floor.

 

The only conclusion i have come to is that because we are on a sailing boat,on high spring tides when the boat lifts off the sand,it can vibrate for a few minutes before it lifts. The continual effect of this over a ten year period may have weakened the glass.

 

I'm seriously thinking of binning the whole set.

[MtB]

Well done for spelling it right! 

 

 

7 minutes ago, LadyG said:

it was Concorde!

(Concorde, that is.)