Setting up a fresh hot food takeaway to feed the crews on board container ships and other vessels coming down the shipping lanes

[Dawn.treader]

I know this is a canal site. I'm looking for advice on using my single mast 1 crew member sailing boat to prepare and sell 1 or 2 bulk specials and maybe 4 or 5 hearty faves to the boats going past isle of wight. I'd obviously use the vhf radio to let people k ow what I was offering most of their huge container barges have tenders so I can cook their food 1 guy can come aboard to get it. Is it allowed provided I stay out of the main shipping lanes just follow them. Any help would be appreciated.

[Francis Herne]

This doesn't sound at all realistic as described.

 

Selling to ships is impossible. They're deceptively quick - even a fairly slow one at 10-15 knots is faster than any small sailing boat - will take half a mile to stop and burn literally tons of fuel in doing so and getting moving again. They're on tight schedules dictated by tides and port berth scheduling and will not stop for you!

 

Even for smaller vessels, coming alongside and transferring food will be awkward and risky in all but the flattest calm. Moving boats are sucked together thanks to Bernoulli's principle, stopped ones have no steerage way. Minor collisions are certain and a small, presumably fibreglass, boat with fragile rigging is not something you want to be doing that in.

 

With a single-manned boat, how could you prepare and transfer food while also safely navigating the vessel?

 

Questions about market demand, food safety regulations and so on are not insignificant but hardly worth getting into.

[MtB]

AI tripe. 

 

 

[Francis Herne]

1 minute ago, MtB said:

AI tripe.

I doubt it. AI spam tends to have suspiciously perfect grammar, also what would be the point?

 

It's just a good old-fashioned Really Bad Idea.

Edited February 3 by Francis Herne

[Alan de Enfield]

3 hours ago, Dawn.treader said:

I know this is a canal site. I'm looking for advice on using my single mast 1 crew member sailing boat to prepare and sell 1 or 2 bulk specials and maybe 4 or 5 hearty faves to the boats going past isle of wight. I'd obviously use the vhf radio to let people k ow what I was offering most of their huge container barges have tenders so I can cook their food 1 guy can come aboard to get it. Is it allowed provided I stay out of the main shipping lanes just follow them. Any help would be appreciated.

 

Have you actually taken your VHF course ?

 

If so you will be aware that the use of marine vhf channels is limited to only "operational, navigation and safety matters".

 

I'd suggest that if you start using it for 'commercial sales' it wouldn't be very long before you had a coastguard vessel alongside and you being in serious trouble.

[MtB]

9 minutes ago, Francis Herne said:

I doubt it. AI spam tends to have suspiciously perfect grammar, also what would be the point?

 

It's just a good old-fashioned Really Bad Idea.

 

Good point. I was misled by the username....

 

 

[Francis Herne]

1 minute ago, MtB said:

Good point. I was misled by the username....

Narnia?

It might at least be more practical than the roadgoing equivalent.

 

This has been brought to my attention:

 

[ditchcrawler]

Don't you think these container ships will have chefs on board producing good, fresh, hot food for every meal.?

[Wafi]

Fair play for having an original idea and starting to research it. A few points additional to those raised above:

• These ships aren't slowing down or stopping for anyone; probably the only ships with a tender capable of doing 10 knots are the big grey war canoes with RIBs. Launching one of those while underway is a pretty serious operation. The big grey war canoes also tend to have pretty good food.
• When they pass the Isle of Wight, most ships are probably <consults chart> 30 miles offshore, so you're going to be out of sight of land.
• If you own and run a sailing boat capable of doing 10 knots in sensible conditions, you're either a decent dinghy sailor or you're already earning far more than you will ever make selling food to sailors.
• The faster ships might be closer to 15 or even 20 knots. If you're ever offered a go in a sailing boat that can do 20 knots, take it. At that speed, unless you're a hardcore offshore racer, you're not going to be doing much more than hanging on. The only food anyone's preparing at that speed is freeze-dried.

Let's simplify things and say you're going to offer food to the ships anchored off Bembridge; nothing's moving, and in theory I guess they could lower a basket down to you. The remaining issues include:

• The crew are most likely earning less than UK minimum wage, and are already being fed onboard for free. For them, this would be an extremely extravagant purchase
• They're most likely from the Far East, and may not have a taste for Western food
• They're unlikely to be carrying Sterling cash

As I said, fair play for having an original idea, and for having the guts to ask for advice. In this case, I think you'll be better off setting up a stand in a layby on the A27.

[magnetman]

Use a drone  to deliver the food.

 

With parachutes. 

 

 

 

Only you will probably get water cannoned as they think you are a pirate. 

 

 

1 hour ago, Alan de Enfield said:

 

Have you actually taken your VHF course ?

 

If so you will be aware that the use of marine vhf channels is limited to only "operational, navigation and safety matters".

 

I'd suggest that if you start using it for 'commercial sales' it wouldn't be very long before you had a coastguard vessel alongside and you being in serious trouble.

 

Ever Given, Dawn Treader, over

 

Dawn Treader, Every Given

 

Ever Given, Dawn Treader good morning Sir I have your sausage beans bacon egg and chips fried slice and a cup of tea ready if you'd like to drop the basket. Over. 

 

Dawn Treader, Ever Given. Roger that. 

 

 

 

Ever Given out. 

 

 

[Annie cariad]

Waste of a post space ... spamming should be banned 

[BoatingLifeUpNorth2]

12 hours ago, ditchcrawler said:

Don't you think these container ships will have chefs on board producing good, fresh, hot food for every meal.?

And they’ll probably have a multi national crew working shifts so there will be a good selection on the menu to suit all appetites. 
 There’s a baked potato boat for sale up Leeds way, I’m sure they’ll love a hot spud with a tuna mayo or Coronation Chicken topping as they pass Cowes. “Cash or Card”?

 This has to one of the stupidest ideas I’ve seen on here👍

 

[Dawn.treader]

I'm not spamming and most people can see that I watch this never ending long line of ships o. The horizon every day an I was genuinely thinking outside the box about the market possibilities. No I don't yet have my vhf cert if you can recommend so where to do it cheaply I'd appreciate that I have a wooden south coast one design with a 2m fin keel. She flies and she's stable. 

[magnetman]

Maybe worth targeting the pilot Boats instead. I bet the pilot would love a nice hot Cornish pasty after climbing back on board and they probably don't have particularly amazing catering facilities.

 

Lots of pilot Boat movements in and out of Harwich. 

 

You can see them on the online ship tracking websites like myshiptracking.com. 

 

 

[Jen-in-Wellies]

The marine VHF courses and exams are run by the Royal Yachting Association. I did mine in Nottingham, which is no use for you, but there will be multiple opportunities around the boaty S'hampton/IoW area.

https://www.rya.org.uk/training/courses/marine-radio-short-range-certificate-course-srcc

[Dawn.treader]

Thanks. So the pilot boats and tugs are a possible untapped market for quality cheap food breakfast chilli an chips liver bacon onio. An mash. That sort of thing anyway. See haters if you don't ask the questions that's the only dumb question. The one you didn't ask

[Peugeot 106]

19 minutes ago, Dawn.treader said:

I'm not spamming and most people can see that I watch this never ending long line of ships o. The horizon every day an I was genuinely thinking outside the box about the market possibilities. No I don't yet have my vhf cert if you can recommend so where to do it cheaply I'd appreciate that I have a wooden south coast one design with a 2m fin keel. She flies and she's stable. 

I sailed a Nicholson SCOD. (South Coast One Design)  all over Scotland and Irish Sea for many years. A lovely wooden family cruising boat but one thing she could never be described as is a flyer. Enjoy her she should be comfortable in a seaway and will look after you (as long as you don’t bump into anything). What’s your’s called.

[BoatingLifeUpNorth2]

1 hour ago, Dawn.treader said:

Thanks. So the pilot boats and tugs are a possible untapped market for quality cheap food breakfast chilli a chips liver bacon onio. An mash. That sort of thing anyway. See haters if you don't ask the questions that's the only dumb question. The one you didn't ask

Who’s the haters? People who have the opinion that it’s not a good idea? People who think the large ships aren’t going to slow to buy a microwave chilli & rice out of a tinfoil container, I take it your food is of such a high standard that the boats will come steaming to you for your meals? Hater’s? No people living in the real world. One question, being a sailor how come you don’t seem to understand the VHF requirements? Or is that a dumb question? Haters, laughable.

 The other thing maybe go and ask on a Yachting/sailing forum not a forum for inshore canal boaters. I think they’ll have a better insight to the shipping traffic/weather/sea conditions in that area and will be able to advise better👍

Edited February 4 by BoatingLifeUpNorth2

[magnetman]

30 minutes ago, Dawn.treader said:

Thanks. So the pilot boats and tugs are a possible untapped market for quality cheap food breakfast chilli an chips liver bacon onio. An mash. That sort of thing anyway. See haters if you don't ask the questions that's the only dumb question. The one you didn't ask

 

This is making me hungry. 

 

Floating pie and mash shop. Yum. 

[Peugeot 106]

17 minutes ago, magnetman said:

Floating pie and mash shop. Yum

Cooked on a SCOD off St Catherine’s Point it will be “mash”. Most meals I have had on a SCOD have had a hint of diesel flavouring too

[LadyG]

14 hours ago, ditchcrawler said:

Don't you think these container ships will have chefs on board producing good, fresh, hot food for every meal.?

But can they make spam sandwiches on demand?

They could be delivered by drone, why has that not been thought of?

Edited February 4 by LadyG

[Wafi]

I always thought the SCOD was a pretty design, definitely has my approval! The marine VHF exam is pretty straightforward, certainly much easier than the aviation equivalent. You can teach yourself everything you need from a book (there's probably a Fernhurst one); for the exam you'll just need to answer some pretty basic multiple choice theory questions and make a few calls, one of which will be a Mayday. I can't remember whether you need to know the phonetic alphabet for the marine one; if you do, a good way to practice is to pick words you see written down (words in a book, street signs, address labels, anything) and spell them out to yourself phonetically. Do read up the bits on stuff like antenna location, range etc, and understand how to use DSC even if your set doesn't have it.

 

I don't think there's a fundamental issue with using VHF for commercial purposes (if I can call a water taxi, why can't I order a takeaway?) but you certainly can't start touting for business on Channel 16. For all practical purposes, I think you're better off using a mobile phone.

 

Thinking about your original proposal has taken me down some interesting rabbit holes. Drones aren't a terrible solution for the final delivery - eliminates the dodgy rendezvous at sea, and the speed of the ship is less of a problem, but you still have the issues that the ship will have far better cooking facilities than you, and the crew are likely to have minimal disposable income. Flipping that around, who can we think of who has really basic cooking facilities and a decent disposable income? It's the idiots who spend their weekends sailing round buoys all over the Channel for fun. Every meal is some variant of stodgy pasta or rice in a bowl that may or may not have been dropped on the cabin sole while being prepared; the only reason it tastes good is because you're starving. I remember a round of midnight cup-a-soups that tasted a bit "different"; when we'd finished them, our chef took the empty mugs below and checked the kettle on a hunch. I'd have kept quiet, but he was honest enough to admit that he'd used the wrong tap and made our soup with seawater. On that basis, my development of your proposal is drone-delivered pizza. Look up that weekend's races on the JOG/RORC website, find a pizza outlet that's not too far from one of the turning marks, and set yourself up on the beach...

 

Seriously though, I did wonder whether you could set yourself up selling bacon sandwiches or soup in disposable cups to people motoring back from day races; even then, I don't think anyone's going to be comfortable coming alongside anything other than a RIB, and payment's complicated. You'll have to have the food ready when boats come past, and you'll have to sell it quickly enough for there to be no queueing, a problem that no land-based outlet seems to have cracked. People will need to be confident you won't have sold out, so there's a huge potential for wastage. I also wondered about anchoring next to the race course of a big dinghy event selling between-race snacks, but similar issues apply. Other than drone-delivered pizza, I'm afraid I can't see a way to make this work.

[magnetman]

What about drone delivered beer? 

 

I would quite like my beer delivered by a drone. 

 

One could use the 'Beer Here Now' app. 

 

So all you would need is just a great big fridge full of cans of average beer. Really cold. Hang around in an area where there are people and send off orders on demand. 

 

One could utilise the margin areas where there are both land based people and water based people to improve the economy of scale. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It would save people having to carry the beer with them on nice days. 

 

Always better to travel light. 

 

 

[Rod Stewart]

9 minutes ago, magnetman said:

I would quite like my beer delivered by a drone. 

 

One could use the 'Beer Here Now' app. 

 

A fertile spot in a desert, an Oasis, if you will. Beer today gone tomorrow. It could work. I'm in. Definitely maybe.Could deliver cigarettes too. Yes, Cigarettes and alcohol.

Edited February 4 by Rod Stewart

[magnetman]

I took advice from a professional on this as it was one of my business plans.

He pointed out that people will start demanding cocaine and prostitutes which introduces a significant profit / ethics question which could prove hard to deal with.