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Continuous cruiser male seeks female boating companion


LJM

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1 minute ago, MtB said:

Well this thread has taken a turn for the worse hasn't it! 

 

Some wees are better than others, do you give yours individual scores? 

No. I have a friend who has an app where he can rate his poos though. Location…consistency …etc

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44 minutes ago, Ange said:

Giggle 😊

 

Thank you folks for giving an insomniac some much appreciated laughs.

 

(I know that wee!) 🙂

As my friend says, it’s a keyhole wee, you know the one you’ve been waiting hours for but the minute you get to the front door and get your key in it, it becomes ever more urgent

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2 hours ago, tree monkey said:

Surprisingly I'm not in trouble 

 

Praise the Lord, sir.  I thought you were a goner.

 

But relationships can be very risky at times. I remember one occasion my ex partner was bemoaning not being able to fit into some trousers she had in the bottom of her wardrobe.

Ever the practical man, and always ready with a positive solution, I suggested that she should reduce her intake of cakes and confectionery. 

 

Despite this kind and supportive suggestion, she flew off the handle and I was almost beaten senseless with a perfume bottle.  

Go figure, as they say....

The lesson from that experience was: We Don't Make Jokes About Weight.

We just don't.

 

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6 minutes ago, BlueStringPudding said:

 

Well, that's an optimistic conclusion one could leap to... 

 

Careful now or he'll be up the nearest tree in a flash, and chucking pine cones down at you. 

 

Or one might hope they are pine cones....

 

 

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10 minutes ago, cuthound said:

 

I was in the garden the other day when a lady on a boat said "is that your house?"

 

"Yes"

 

"Is that your boat?"

 

"Yes"

 

"Are you married"

 

"Yes"

 

"Pity" 😂🤣

 

 

Lucky escape there, I reckon!

 

 

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17 minutes ago, cuthound said:

 

I was in the garden the other day when a lady on a boat said "is that your house?"

 

"Yes"

 

"Is that your boat?"

 

"Yes"

 

"Are you married"

 

"Yes"

 

"Pity" 😂🤣

 

I would've asked:

'Can you do a keyhole wee?'

 

(Well I would ask that now, obviously. I knew nothing about the great variety of female urination methods before the extensive lessons of yesterday).

 

 

14 hours ago, Balloon said:

No. I have a friend who has an app where he can rate his poos though. Location…consistency …etc

 

I hope you will pardon my morbid curiosity:

 

Does your friend analyse his stools for medical reasons, or is it a recreational thing?

 

Edited by Tony1
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1 hour ago, Tony1 said:

 

I would've asked:

'Can you do a keyhole wee?'

 

(Well I would ask that now, obviously. I knew nothing about the great variety of female urination methods before the extensive lessons of yesterday).

 

 

 

I hope you will pardon my morbid curiosity:

 

Does your friend analyse his stools for medical reasons, or is it a recreational thing?

 

It’s more about the location than anything. Here’s the app. Take a look. There’s 5000 ratings so it can’t be bad. It’s definitely not my thing though 😂

 

https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/poop-map-pin-and-track/id1303269455

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5 hours ago, Balloon said:

It’s more about the location than anything. Here’s the app. Take a look. There’s 5000 ratings so it can’t be bad. It’s definitely not my thing though 😂

 

https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/poop-map-pin-and-track/id1303269455

 

Er, yeah, but no, that's fine thanks. 

I'm not saying my hobbies and interests are better than anyone else's, of course, but they definitely don't include making detailed assessments of my faeces.

Its just not my bag.

 

The surprise for me is that there are at least 5,000 people who do enjoy analysing and record their poo using an app. 

That's a head scratcher is that.

 

Edited by Tony1
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56 minutes ago, Tony1 said:

 

Er, yeah, but no, that's fine thanks. 

I'm not saying my hobbies and interests are better than anyone else's, of course, but they definitely don't include making detailed assessments of my faeces.

Its just not my bag.

 

The surprise for me is that there are at least 5,000 people who do enjoy analysing and record their poo using an app. 

That's a head scratcher is that.

 

I’m totally with you there!!! I have absolutely no interest. And can’t envisage who might. 

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This thread reminds me of a boat on some offside moorings on the Staffs & Worcs Canal northern section. The signwriting on the cabin side says 

 

Michael & Vacancy

 

I cannot remember if it was actually Michael but you get the gist. I do remember though, that it's been like that for years so it obviously hasn't worked!

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4 minutes ago, Grassman said:

This thread reminds me of a boat on some offside moorings on the Staffs & Worcs Canal northern section. The signwriting on the cabin side says 

 

Michael & Vacancy

 

I cannot remember if it was actually Michael but you get the gist. I do remember though, that it's been like that for years so it obviously hasn't worked!

 

Lol! 

 

Or more likely each time he pulls, she get the hump and leaves again when he fails to change the signwriting! 

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On 20/07/2022 at 20:50, Goliath said:

There was a boater who advertised on a blackboard next to the boat for a female companion.  I gather it did work. It’s going back nearly 10 year. That may be the way for the OP. 

 

 

L1681a_20100830_0039s.jpg.c5225b18f2a1d8828a1a11b62c269c1b.jpg

 

Beale Park IWA National 2010

 

9 hours ago, Grassman said:

This thread reminds me of a boat on some offside moorings on the Staffs & Worcs Canal northern section. The signwriting on the cabin side says  Michael & Vacancy   I cannot remember if it was actually Michael but you get the gist. I do remember though, that it's been like that for years so it obviously hasn't worked!

 

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