TeamBiscuits - NB Good Times - Virtuous BCNS 42hr Snickers Challenge Crew Slog

[TheBiscuits]

Virtuous : We need to be "good for goodness sake."

42-hour Snickers Challenge : It's a modern version of the traditional 24-hour Marathon challenge.  With extra peanuts.  

Crew Slog : The minions have to walk a long way to the next lock.

 

 

 

Hello Birmingham!

 

The boys (and the girls) are back in town!  

 

We don't need any celebratory bridges ... and we still don't understand why with all the heavy metal bridges available in the area the Black Sabbath Bridge is a brick one!

 

As the Northern canals are still broken, TeamBiscuits aboard NB Good Times have decided to re-enter the BCN challenge, even if it all has to be done by email.  (We have BCN'd before, and Zoom is the wrong answer!)

 

TeamBiscuits as usual are:

@TheBiscuits (me!)

MrsBiscuits (not on the forum)

BobBiscuits (not on the forum)

Duck-N-Dive (not on the forum)

 

We did invite the Iron Oxide Kid ( @rusty69 ) but he won't play.  We think as he is so close to 70 he must be self insulting. 

We didn't really want him, but he would have been a great excuse for using this picture:

 

 

Which sounds optimistic, but we are not scared.

 

We are looking forward to seeing just how badly our opposition have misjudged us again ...

 

 

 

 

[TheBiscuits]

Bit busy to update much at the moment, it's that final push to the starting line.

 

The Laundromat Shesucks seems to have got a bit carried away in time travel mode.  A pterodactyl is watching me from over there ...

 

[Dr Bob]

We invited @rusty69as well and she rejected our advances. We have a cunning plan to kidnap her when she turns here back this week.

[TheBiscuits]

Quote

dress appropriately. ... Hat, scarf, gloves and warm boots. Strap your hot water bottle on under your coat and start the engine…. But before you do please take a photo of you and or your team dressed for the weather and share it with us on your BCN Blog Thread. Take care out there today, we don’t want to cause any of you chilblains!

 

Not a great start this morning, but I have been given some free photography advice so it's not been wasted.

 

I nipped outside to take the photo, having already decided that - like in zoom video conferences - I only needed to dress my upper half appropriately, as the winter gear selfie wouldn't show my feet.

 

Whilst stood next to my boat wearing only a beige mackintosh and squinting furiously in the glare - it was surprisingly sunny - I was intercepted by the police.  We had a very long and fraught conversation, but then I was given a couple of free photography tips:

 

A long slow exposure is not appropriate for sunny mornings on the towpath, and my suggestion of just going straight to flash was not considered ideal either.

 

I would post the photos, but I don't have that camera anymore ...

[TheBiscuits]

Steward's Enquiry #1 : TeamBiscuits starting point 

The organising committee have committed to being organised, and have unanimously rejected the claim that Skipton Junction on the Leeds and Liverpool Canal be permitted as a valid start point for the BCNS Virtual Challenge.

 

This decision rests on the wording of the following rules:

• Rule A5: "The Starting Point can be at any recognised canal junction of your choice."
• Rule A6: "Overnight moorings must be spent at one of the designated "safe mooring" junctions where facilities have been provided to ensure adequate social distancing. All junctions between two currently navigable canals on the BCN are considered safe as are any defunct junctions part of which are navigable today."
• Rule A7: "If you fail to reach a safe mooring at the end if your day's cruise, points must be deducted equivalent to the time it takes to reach the nearest approved Junction. Unused time cannot be carried forward to the next day."                                 

The supplementary guidance listing the only non-BCN canals that are permitted was also taken into consideration.

Ruling

Rule A5 would at first glance allow Skipton Junction as a starting place, as it is a "recognised" juction, but is not a "designated safe mooring" in the sense of Rule A6.

 

Being 172 miles and 96 locks (268 lock-miles) from the nearest "designated safe mooring" this journey would take nearly 129 hours at the approved non-BCN speed limit of 1.5mph.

 

This would lead to hundreds of penalty points (Rule A7) being accrued over the course of the week, as any movement of the boat on this unapproved canal would result in instant disqualification (Guidance note).

The committee decided there was no need to be so negative about the challenge.  

The formal appeal from TheBiscuits:  

"But it's my favourite junction and we are tied up right outside the Boathouse pub!"  was met with howls of derision and rejected outright.

 

This decision is final.

[TheBiscuits]

 

 

 

20 hours ago, Pingu said:

I wish to protest about the vicious kidnapping attempt that I suffered this afternoon while I was waddling down the towpath. Somebody p-p-picked me up, covered me in chocolate, sealed me inside a tin foil wrapper, and tried to put me away in their store cupboard.

Luckily I was able to eat away all the chocolate (it was delicious thank you) and slip out of the wrapper to make my escape. 

I'm not certain but I suspect it was Team Biscuits. 

 

 

I offer the Stewards' ruling above as a defence of the vile accusations made by @Pingu.  I was 200 miles away at the time of the alleged kidnapping, and I can't run fast enough to p-p-p-pick up a penguin in that beige mackintosh.

 

This was obviously an attempt to sabotage a team that were having a Good Time until these allegations surfaced.  I would therefore ask for a timely ruling on  Steward's Enquiry #2 : The Confectionery Kidnap

[Dr Bob]

1 hour ago, TheBiscuits said:

Steward's Enquiry #1 : TeamBiscuits starting point 

The organising committee have committed to being organised, and have unanimously rejected the claim that Skipton Junction on the Leeds and Liverpool Canal be permitted as a valid start point for the BCNS Virtual Challenge.

 

This decision rests on the wording of the following rules:

• Rule A5: "The Starting Point can be at any recognised canal junction of your choice."
• Rule A6: "Overnight moorings must be spent at one of the designated "safe mooring" junctions where facilities have been provided to ensure adequate social distancing. All junctions between two currently navigable canals on the BCN are considered safe as are any defunct junctions part of which are navigable today."
• Rule A7: "If you fail to reach a safe mooring at the end if your day's cruise, points must be deducted equivalent to the time it takes to reach the nearest approved Junction. Unused time cannot be carried forward to the next day."                                 

The supplementary guidance listing the only non-BCN canals that are permitted was also taken into consideration.

Ruling

Rule A5 would at first glance allow Skipton Junction as a starting place, as it is a "recognised" juction, but is not a "designated safe mooring" in the sense of Rule A6.

 

Being 172 miles and 96 locks (268 lock-miles) from the nearest "designated safe mooring" this journey would take nearly 129 hours at the approved non-BCN speed limit of 1.5mph.

 

This would lead to hundreds of penalty points (Rule A7) being accrued over the course of the week, as any movement of the boat on this unapproved canal would result in instant disqualification (Guidance note).

The committee decided there was no need to be so negative about the challenge.  

The formal appeal from TheBiscuits:  

"But it's my favourite junction and we are tied up right outside the Boathouse pub!"  was met with howls of derision and rejected outright.

 

This decision is final.

I dont think the committee have a sense of humour. Their committee mettings are being held in secret. We don't know what they are discussing. We have no clue who is on them. And if we did they would prolly sell you something. You dont run the country challenge like that! Can we file for Judicial Review?

 

[TheBiscuits]

It's turning into a hard day's night this.  We were informed of the (should be) committeds ruling yesterday, and the result of our appeal. ( ... mumble mumble in a brewery ... ) 

 

This meant we needed to replan the entire challenge as Plan A - sit in the pub for a week - had been ruled out. 

 

Fortunately, we have access to one of the best planning tools known to man: the map table!

 

 

Very late last night, a new strategy had been formed by pouring a libation to Neptune over the vorsprung durch technik.  OK, I might just have spilt a beer over it in panic.

 

It seems to have worked though as we managed to make it to our new starting point just in time for the start of the challenge.

 

 

[TheBiscuits]

 

So ... it's the middle of the night, it's looking like snow and you need a boat moving 200 miles before morning.

 

There's only one possible answer - ring Tony 'Tugboats' Andersen.

 

 

 

Sadly he was busy on another job, so I had to go for a (much) lesser choice.

 

I thought about it some more, and remembered that one of the forum experts on boatmovers is of course @Alan de Enfield.  He was very helpful, but reminded me that the boatmovers would not be able take the boat to Birmingham without telling the police in advance.

 

He came up with an ingenious suggestion: one of his team mates in the challenge, @peterboat is a very helpful bloke and is sort of up North himself, so might be able to help.

 

What a great guy!  After pausing only long enough to buy some Duracell batteries from the 42-hour garage he selected his most appropriate tow vehicle and met us at Skipton Castle.

 

An hour later and we were underway.

 

 

 

This is an action shot of Peter 'Tukboat' passing Skipton Castle in the wee hours last night.

 

 

We are so grateful to the assistance of Team Marnier's Stirred Grand that words alone cannot express it.  In the finest traditions of the BCN challenge, this team provided assistance far beyond that reasonable at a cost of considerable time and effort to themselves. 

 

I would like to formally log their assistance and donate them some points at the challenge organiser's discretion.  I would suggest giving them one thousand of my points, but have already been told off for trying that on!

 

Edited May 4, 2020 by TheBiscuits

[rusty69]

On 03/05/2020 at 00:11, TheBiscuits said:

 

 

We did invite the Iron Oxide Kid ( @rusty69 ) but he won't play.  We think as he is so close to 70 he must be self insulting. 

We didn't really want him, but he would have been a great excuse for using this picture:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Well, I would have loved to have joined your team, but somebody shut me down the weedhatch. I've been down here a whole bloody month, and only just got out.

[Dr Bob]

4 minutes ago, rusty69 said:

 

 

 

Well, I would have loved to have joined your team, but somebody shut me down the weedhatch. I've been down here a whole bloody month, and only just got out.

Dont tell 'em where you got out.

[rusty69]

Just now, Dr Bob said:

Dont tell 'em where you got out.

Well, I got out underneath, escaped into the canal. Flipping propeller nearly cut me in half.

[rusty69]

1 hour ago, TheBiscuits said:

Very late last night, a new strategy had been formed by pouring a libation to Neptune over the vorsprung durch technik.  OK, I might just have spilt a beer over it in panic

Surely you mean Four sprung duck technique ole chap?

 

[TheBiscuits]

Right!

 

I think we now have grounds for Stewards' Enquiry #3: The GPS fix.  The only challenger with the technical know-how to have done this is @RebelMike on Team Rebel Onion who is still smarting from last year's challenge.

 

Setting off from Skipton, we duly put "Bradley Workshops" into google maps:  https://www.google.co.uk/maps/search/Bradley+Workshops

 

And it took us to Consett in County Durham!  Click the link and see what he has done!

 

 

We had to dig out the traditional map. Pam on Pugnipeek Meat had a spare one, helpfully.

 

Having been lead 95 miles from Skipton in the wrong direction, time was getting quite tight and the batteries were starting to drain.  The solar panels on the tuk-tuk are not much use under these new LED streetlamps.

 

A quick battery change later, and off we set again:

 

 

 

 

That's better!  @peterboat got us to the finish point at Bradley CRT workshop but ...

 

... wait for it ....

 

... wait for it ....

 

the gates were locked!

 

 

 

It also occurred to us that we were supposed to be heading for the starting point, not the finish point - that's the trouble with borrowing a map from Pam.  I'm struggling with @Keeping Up to be honest.

 

It's been long hard night so far and we are completely knackered, so I think we need a kip.  After craning in off the carpark, we headed up the cut to our official start point:

 

https://canalplan.org.uk/cgi-bin/canal.cgi?quickroute=yes&where=Bradley Basin,Junction with Bradley Old Loop (closed)

 

This is a trip of 0.26 miles from Bradley Basin to Junction with Bradley Old Loop (closed) travelling north on the Birmingham Canal Navigations (Wednesbury Oak Loop).

 

This will take 6 minutes. (at 2.5 mph)

 

 

I have reversed the trip for this picture, as otherwise it has the start at the finish and the finish at the start if you are not @Keeping Up

[Keeping Up]

10 minutes ago, TheBiscuits said:

 

We had to dig out the traditional map. Pam on Pugnipeek Meat had a spare one, helpfully.

 

...

 

I have reversed the trip for this picture, as otherwise it has the start at the finish and the finish at the start if you are not @Keeping Up

You're very welcome!

[TheBiscuits]

 

Oh yeah, Captain Slog: 

 

96 + 226 = 322 miles by tuk-tuk and trailer

0.26 miles of canal

10 locks (see pictures of pairs of gates, above)

 

That was to get to the new starting point!  

 

We are taking the day off boating now, so today's official timescore is ..... 0 miles, 0 locks, 0 points. 

[peterboat]

3 hours ago, TheBiscuits said:

 

So ... it's the middle of the night, it's looking like snow and you need a boat moving 200 miles before morning.

 

There's only one possible answer - ring Tony 'Tugboats' Andersen.

 

 

 

Sadly he was busy on another job, so I had to go for a (much) lesser choice.

 

I thought about it some more, and remembered that one of the forum experts on boatmovers is of course @Alan de Enfield.  He was very helpful, but reminded me that the boatmovers would not be able take the boat to Birmingham without telling the police in advance.

 

He came up with an ingenious suggestion: one of his team mates in the challenge, @peterboat is a very helpful bloke and is sort of up North himself, so might be able to help.

 

What a great guy!  After pausing only long enough to buy some Duracell batteries from the 42-hour garage he selected his most appropriate tow vehicle and met us at Skipton Castle.

 

An hour later and we were underway.

 

 

 

This is an action shot of Peter 'Tukboat' passing Skipton Castle in the wee hours last night.

 

 

We are so grateful to the assistance of Team Marnier's Stirred Grand that words alone cannot express it.  In the finest traditions of the BCN challenge, this team provided assistance far beyond that reasonable at a cost of considerable time and effort to themselves. 

 

I would like to formally log their assistance and donate them some points at the challenge organiser's discretion.  I would suggest giving them one thousand of my points, but have already been told off for trying that on!

 

Oy you! You have dropped me right in it, I told the team that I was working today,n only to find you have bubbled me! I thought we had a deal I dragged your boat down from the North and you would destroy those incriminating pictures you had of me? Anyway the Tuk tuk is back safe and I had to give it a service after all that hard works its done, which is why I am posting late. Anyway good luck to you and may the best team win [thats us]

[peterboat]

1 hour ago, TheBiscuits said:

Right!

 

I think we now have grounds for Stewards' Enquiry #3: The GPS fix.  The only challenger with the technical know-how to have done this is @RebelMike on Team Rebel Onion who is still smarting from last year's challenge.

 

Setting off from Skipton, we duly put "Bradley Workshops" into google maps:  https://www.google.co.uk/maps/search/Bradley+Workshops

 

And it took us to Consett in County Durham!  Click the link and see what he has done!

 

 

We had to dig out the traditional map. Pam on Pugnipeek Meat had a spare one, helpfully.

 

Having been lead 95 miles from Skipton in the wrong direction, time was getting quite tight and the batteries were starting to drain.  The solar panels on the tuk-tuk are not much use under these new LED streetlamps.

 

A quick battery change later, and off we set again:

 

 

 

 

That's better!  @peterboat got us to the finish point at Bradley CRT workshop but ...

 

... wait for it ....

 

... wait for it ....

 

the gates were locked!

 

 

 

It also occurred to us that we were supposed to be heading for the starting point, not the finish point - that's the trouble with borrowing a map from Pam.  I'm struggling with @Keeping Up to be honest.

 

It's been long hard night so far and we are completely knackered, so I think we need a kip.  After craning in off the carpark, we headed up the cut to our official start point:

 

https://canalplan.org.uk/cgi-bin/canal.cgi?quickroute=yes&where=Bradley Basin,Junction with Bradley Old Loop (closed)

 

This is a trip of 0.26 miles from Bradley Basin to Junction with Bradley Old Loop (closed) travelling north on the Birmingham Canal Navigations (Wednesbury Oak Loop).

 

This will take 6 minutes. (at 2.5 mph)

 

 

I have reversed the trip for this picture, as otherwise it has the start at the finish and the finish at the start if you are not @Keeping Up

We didnt put you in there it was miles away at least the other side of Brum when my batteries gave up the ghost! So it was crawled to the first bit of canal top side of Brumm near the A38 and in you went

[TheBiscuits]

1 minute ago, peterboat said:

We didnt put you in there it was miles away at least the other side of Brum when my batteries gave up the ghost! So it was crawled to the first bit of canal top side of Brumm near the A38 and in you went

 

Lies.  All lies, and I have* the photos to prove it.

 

It seems a shame to grass you up after all your help, but I can feel another stewards' enquiry coming along.

 

 

* Technically I haven't got the photos, but I will have by tomorrow!

[peterboat]

8 minutes ago, TheBiscuits said:

 

Lies.  All lies, and I have* the photos to prove it.

 

It seems a shame to grass you up after all your help, but I can feel another stewards' enquiry coming along.

 

 

* Technically I haven't got the photos, but I will have by tomorrow!

Just as well I have the video...................................

[TheBiscuits]

MrsBiscuit has complained about my Swan challenge suggestion and has nipped off to do it properly.  

 

My suggestion was get a duck, stretch it's neck a bit and get it painted white.

 

Sooo...

 

Where can I find a duck at short notice?

 

(Photo credit: @tree monkey )

 

 

How can I stretch it's neck?

 

(Crew just hangin' around during the 2019 BCNS challenge.)

 

How do I get it painted?

 

(Photo credit: @cheshire~rose )

 

 

We will have to wait for MrsBiscuits' suggestion, but there are some very industrious noises going on!

 

 

[Dr Bob]

No, you're not nicking our bloomin' Duck again!

[tree monkey]

4 minutes ago, Dr Bob said:

No, you're not nicking our bloomin' Duck again!

You owe me

[Dr Bob]

25 minutes ago, tree monkey said:

You owe me

The duck is trying to keep a low profile this week.

[TheBiscuits]

  

On 17/04/2020 at 18:53, cheshire~rose said:

In the fullness of time I will release further details of how to sign up for the challenge (no fees involved) and what it entails.

 

"No fees" she said.  Lies!  Fibs!  Porky pies!

 

This arrived in the post yesterday, on Day 1 of the challenge.

 

 

Does our next enquiry have to be against an organiser?

 

Is this more deceit or is this Stewards' Enquiry #5: Cash for Questions