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POKER


bizzard

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Not the silly card game that can win or more often loses you more money than you win. No, I mean the humble poker with which you poke the fire. These come in all sorts of lengths some with fancy handles and knobs on the top.  But the handiest of all is the ordinary basic poker, strong and preferably with a nice hefty knob on it. Companion set pokers arn't much good, usually. weak and can bend easily so not much good for other jobs other than poking the fire.

      These other jobs can range from levering awkward things, Knocking nails in if you've lost your hammer, heating to red hot to bore holes when you.ve busted the drill bit or lost the drills chuck key, for this purpose a slightly tapered business end can bore different sized hole depending on how far you shove it in and at a pinch, a soldering iron. digging cabbages out of your ears.  Its not unknown for me to use mine as a mooring stake. Good at repelling boarders and robbers too, one look at the heavy knob waved about in front of their bins will frighten them like anything, almost as good as a big shiny flexible panal saw which beats the jolly old poker for that purpose. 

      When we were kids and came back home from shopping with mum during the darkness of a late winter afternoon it was quite like an episode of Hithcocks Inner sanctom. We'd be instructed  by mum to remain outside the front door whilst she unlocked it and burst in in true Boadicea style with a tremendous clatter and shrill war cry, dash through to the living room and grasp hold of the poker from the hearth.  She would then storm through the house waving the poker, banging it on walls and things searching for burglars and shouting blood thirsty threats to scare any burglar into revealing themself. God hep them if there had been a burglar.   This went on for about ten minutes after which we were allowed to come in, the door was then locked and bolted securely, this caused a big row because my dad couldn't get in with just his Yale lock key when he came home from work.

     The gallant poker was then returned to its natural berth in the hearth to resume its normal duty.   Always have a decent poker at hand.   Brave was my mum.

Edited by bizzard
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The reason why traditional pokers were so strong is that whilst they looked as if the were made of brass, they were in fact made of steel with a thin brass shield rolled around them, and if you look closely at one you can see where the edges of the brass were rolled into a narrow slot in the steel rod.  Interestingly the pokers were made from the same material as stair rods, which can be used to repair an old poker, you simply need a (usually) 3/8" Whitworth die to cut a thread on each end of the stair rod.

 

 

Edited by David Schweizer
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2 hours ago, Machpoint005 said:

If you buy a cheap "fireside set" it's always the poker that breaks first.

 

And the tongs never work properly in the first place as the hoopy bit at the top is made of mild steel not spring steel.

 

Better to buy a pair of old tongs from a junk shop, or antique shop as they are known as around here. 

 

 

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4 hours ago, bizzard said:

Not the silly card game that can win or more often loses you more money than you win. No, I mean the humble poker with which you poke the fire. These come in all sorts of lengths some with fancy handles and knobs on the top.  But the handiest of all is the ordinary basic poker, strong and preferably with a nice hefty knob on it. Companion set pokers arn't much good, usually. weak and can bend easily so not much good for other jobs other than poking the fire.

      These other jobs can range from levering awkward things, Knocking nails in if you've lost your hammer, heating to red hot to bore holes when you.ve busted the drill bit or lost the drills chuck key, for this purpose a slightly tapered business end can bore different sized hole depending on how far you shove it in and at a pinch, a soldering iron. digging cabbages out of your ears.  Its not unknown for me to use mine as a mooring stake. Good at repelling boarders and robbers too, one look at the heavy knob waved about in front of their bins will frighten them like anything, almost as good as a big shiny flexible panal saw which beats the jolly old poker for that purpose. 

      When we were kids and came back home from shopping with mum during the darkness of a late winter afternoon it was quite like an episode of Hithcocks Inner sanctom. We'd be instructed  by mum to remain outside the front door whilst she unlocked it and burst in in true Boadicea style with a tremendous clatter and shrill war cry, dash through to the living room and grasp hold of the poker from the hearth.  She would then storm through the house waving the poker, banging it on walls and things searching for burglars and shouting blood thirsty threats to scare any burglar into revealing themself. God hep them if there had been a burglar.   This went on for about ten minutes after which we were allowed to come in, the door was then locked and bolted securely, this caused a big row because my dad couldn't get in with just his Yale lock key when he came home from work.

     The gallant poker was then returned to its natural berth in the hearth to resume its normal duty.   Always have a decent poker at hand.   Brave was my mum.

I would be happy to demonstrate that you are wrong here. 

 

Otherwise I can't argue with the rest of your post.

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10 hours ago, bizzard said:

Not the silly card game that can win or more often loses you more money than you win. No, I mean the humble poker with which you poke the fire. These come in all sorts of lengths some with fancy handles and knobs on the top.  But the handiest of all is the ordinary basic poker, strong and preferably with a nice hefty knob on it. Companion set pokers arn't much good, usually. weak and can bend easily so not much good for other jobs other than poking the fire.

      These other jobs can range from levering awkward things, Knocking nails in if you've lost your hammer, heating to red hot to bore holes when you.ve busted the drill bit or lost the drills chuck key, for this purpose a slightly tapered business end can bore different sized hole depending on how far you shove it in and at a pinch, a soldering iron. digging cabbages out of your ears.  Its not unknown for me to use mine as a mooring stake. Good at repelling boarders and robbers too, one look at the heavy knob waved about in front of their bins will frighten them like anything, almost as good as a big shiny flexible panal saw which beats the jolly old poker for that purpose. 

      When we were kids and came back home from shopping with mum during the darkness of a late winter afternoon it was quite like an episode of Hithcocks Inner sanctom. We'd be instructed  by mum to remain outside the front door whilst she unlocked it and burst in in true Boadicea style with a tremendous clatter and shrill war cry, dash through to the living room and grasp hold of the poker from the hearth.  She would then storm through the house waving the poker, banging it on walls and things searching for burglars and shouting blood thirsty threats to scare any burglar into revealing themself. God hep them if there had been a burglar.   This went on for about ten minutes after which we were allowed to come in, the door was then locked and bolted securely, this caused a big row because my dad couldn't get in with just his Yale lock key when he came home from work.

     The gallant poker was then returned to its natural berth in the hearth to resume its normal duty.   Always have a decent poker at hand.   Brave was my mum.

Hmmm, the mental condition is hereditary then? Did you have any neighbours at the time or did they all run away?

 

I like the "bent from a bit of 1/4" wire" pokers with the end bent at right angles, hand for hooking the ash pan out and for getting boy scouts out of girl guides.

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This is our poker, Affectionately named Lady gaga. Great for poking round corners. Great for saving your grate. Great long handle.Its Grrrrrreat. Also available in many colours. 

 

Order yours today £0.99 at all good DIY shops. Includes 2 free roller sleeves, they make great fire lighters. 

 

It's an Itsy bitsy teeny weenie yellow handled poker genie.

 

In the summer, bend it back into shape and you're ready to go. Slip a roller on and paint your bottom. 

 

Another great idea bought to you courtesy of Rusty enterprises. 

IMG_20191122_080718.jpg

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I made a nice tiller pin years ago from an old poker which had been hand made with brazed brass tube handle a couple of halfpenny coins brazed onto the end of it separated by short bit of tube to form a round knob. Really nice item it was and happened to be exactly the right diameter for the tiller pin hole. Left it on the boat. 

 

 

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31 minutes ago, Jen-in-Wellies said:

Top tip! Wait for the poker to cool down after using it as a soldering iron, before sticking it in your ear.

Yes Jen. If anyones done any upside down electric welding and had a bit of red hot flack go into an ear its horrible. It buzzes and crackles like bacon frying in the wax, a horrid and painful sensation.

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