Idiot of the week

[TheBiscuits]

20 minutes ago, Naughty Cal said:

Those are the gaps that we moor in.

Yeah.  I do miss the Nauticus sometimes!

 

I have been known to measure tight gaps with my 45ft boat and deliberately wedge into them. 

 

It is amazing how quickly people with paint jobs worth more than my boat suddenly discover they did have an extra 4 feet in front after all!

[Arthur Marshall]

I always moor as far away from anyone else as I can. Partly because the noise of their incessantly running  engines irritates me, and the exhaust fumes they pump into my boat are worse, and partly because I have a feeling that they may not appreciate the mellifluous sound of me practicing the trombone. 

If a VM gets busy, and someone wants to come in and I can shift to help, I do. I then put the trombone away and read a book. I do avoid VMs as far as I can, but sometimes you're stuck with them. These days, there's always some prat running an engine or a genny beyond the regular hours. 

[Wanderer Vagabond]

2 hours ago, ditchcrawler said:

Yes there is. I had my stern tied to it so a Hudson could get in coming from the other direction and waited until I had finished filling.

I suppose it all depends upon how the helmsman approached you really doesn't it? Sarcasm tends to diminish any will to move or assist I find

2 hours ago, Mike the Boilerman said:

When I'm moored up on an empty VM, why does the first boat along ALWAYS moor right up against me, even stealing my mooring ring, when there'e loadsa space further away?

 

I do wish they wouldn't....

 

All rather depends upon where the VM is really. If I've moored on one in the middle of nowhere I'd expect the next moorer to moor up at the other end of the VM's. If I've moored outside of Birmingham Arena, as far as I'm concerned, they can moor where, and as close, as they like.

[Sea Dog]

8 hours ago, Rob-M said:

Perhaps they know you are 8000 miles away so unlikely to be witnessing a leak first hand and therefore ignoring what could be hearsay.

Or perhaps even heresy!

 

[ditchcrawler]

2 hours ago, Naughty Cal said:

Those are the gaps that we moor in.

You dont like ditches 

30 minutes ago, Wanderer Vagabond said:

I suppose it all depends upon how the helmsman approached you really doesn't it? Sarcasm tends to diminish any will to move or assist I find

 

My main point was not the moving I didnt, but that there is a ring in the grass before the bridge.

[Machpoint005]

2 hours ago, Arthur Marshall said:

they may not appreciate the mellifluous sound of me practising the trombone. 

 

What's it like playing an instrument that only fits the bote longitudinally?

[Arthur Marshall]

1 hour ago, Machpoint005 said:

 

What's it like playing an instrument that only fits the bote longitudinally?

I have to be careful not to poke it through the fire glass, if you'll pardon the phrase.  Occasionally it (for those who missed the original post, it's a trombone) gets wedged in between the steps at the back. I also play the fiddle, and in order to avoid getting the bow stuck in the ceiling, you have to hold the bow steady and bend your knees so you sort of bob up and down. After a few months on the boat, you get in the habit of this and get some strange comments when you end up doing it on stage.

Edited March 28, 2019 by Arthur Marshall

[cuthound]

24 minutes ago, Arthur Marshall said:

I also play the fiddle, and in order to avoid getting the bow stuck in the ceiling, you have to hold the bow steady and bend your knees so you sort of bob up and down. After a few months on the boat, you get in the habit of this and get some strange comments when you end up doing it on stage.

 

No wonder your knees are dodgy and you needed the extended piling hooks! ?

[MtB]

6 hours ago, Arthur Marshall said:

I also play the fiddle, and in order to avoid getting the bow stuck in the ceiling, you have to hold the bow steady and bend your knees so you sort of bob up and down.

 

Oh I get that too. More or less given up trying to learn it due to this effect.

 

Dunt happen with me geetar. Yet.

 

 

 

[furnessvale]

18 hours ago, Mike the Boilerman said:

When I'm moored up on an empty VM, why does the first boat along ALWAYS moor right up against me, even stealing my mooring ring, when there'e loadsa space further away?

 

I do wish they wouldn't....

 

If you took it with you when you went to the pub then they wouldn't be able to steal it!  ☺️

 

George

[aracer]

On 28/03/2019 at 14:13, Arthur Marshall said:

I always moor as far away from anyone else as I can. Partly because the noise of their incessantly running  engines irritates me, and the exhaust fumes they pump into my boat are worse, and partly because I have a feeling that they may not appreciate the mellifluous sound of me practicing the trombone.

How do you find the relative effect of a trombone compared to a noisy engine at getting rid of unwanted neighbours? Curious given I have both at my disposal (and a trumpet, but that's nowhere near as loud as the 'bone) ?

On 28/03/2019 at 18:01, Arthur Marshall said:

I have to be careful not to poke it through the fire glass, if you'll pardon the phrase.  Occasionally it (for those who missed the original post, it's a trombone) gets wedged in between the steps at the back.

Hmm, do you (and Machpoint) have a particularly narrow narrowbote? I had to check as I was sure I often play mine sitting down on the sofa facing across the boat and it definitely fits even at 7th position. Can also play crosswise standing up, though I don't do that so often. I think I do have a much longer boat than you so the fire glass is in no danger! How exactly do you have a problem with the steps - is it the slide as you're playing?

 

I also note that I mostly live in a marina and haven't had any comments or complaints about my playing - on the contrary when I asked, my neighbours hadn't heard me. Though that was a little while ago when I mostly had windows and doors shut - I should check again now I'm sometimes practicing with doors open! I do keep meaning to practice at midnight when I'm out in the middle of nowhere, just because I can  

[rusty69]

On 28/03/2019 at 12:04, doratheexplorer said:

I do when I'm on a busy visitor mooring and I get left with a pointless small gap between my boat and the next.

 

Now where did i put down my halo?

If it is a gap of 94 cm, you could use it to keep your dinghy:

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/New-Dora-the-Explorer-Inflatable-Dinghy-Boat-94cm/121375463256?epid=1031998757&hash=item1c428a9758:g:y-gAAOSwFL9TsWJR

 

 

 

I claim my prize as "Idiot of the month"

Edited April 3, 2019 by rusty69

[Machpoint005]

On 01/04/2019 at 02:12, aracer said:

I mostly live in a marina and haven't had any comments or complaints about my playing

 

I'm not surprised -- you blow a 'bone instead of tormenting a fiddle.

They don't complain about my (various forms of) whistle either.

 

 

There have been quite enough trombonists in my family without me starting as well!

[Arthur Marshall]

On 01/04/2019 at 02:12, aracer said:

How do you find the relative effect of a trombone compared to a noisy engine at getting rid of unwanted neighbours? Curious given I have both at my disposal (and a trumpet, but that's nowhere near as loud as the 'bone) ?

Hmm, do you (and Machpoint) have a particularly narrow narrowbote? I had to check as I was sure I often play mine sitting down on the sofa facing across the boat and it definitely fits even at 7th position. Can also play crosswise standing up, though I don't do that so often. I think I do have a much longer boat than you so the fire glass is in no danger! How exactly do you have a problem with the steps - is it the slide as you're playing?

 

Can't play crosswise - only a small boat and no functioning settee, the only seating is at the back. The slide occasionally whacks the back steps. I take an old Sally army bone wjth me as it's built like a tank. I do also take a cornet, which is much more sensible on the boat. 

Did I mention my wife plays double bass? Now, that is a problem... 

[Mike55]

4 hours ago, Arthur Marshall said:

 

Did I mention my wife plays double bass? 

Sea or freshwater?

[Machpoint005]

3 minutes ago, Mike55 said:

Sea or freshwater?

Both at once, obviously (double bass).

[ditchcrawler]

On 28/03/2019 at 13:37, Naughty Cal said:

Those are the gaps that we moor in.

You dont like ditches 

Just now, Machpoint005 said:

Both at once, obviously (double bass).

BIX had a grand piano on board 

[Mike55]

7 minutes ago, Machpoint005 said:

Both at once, obviously (double bass).

Silly me. Does that qualify me to be this week’s idiot?

[Sea Dog]

8 minutes ago, ditchcrawler said:

 

BIX had a grand piano on board 

I reckon you could pay an awful lot more than that for one of those great big ones with the 3 legs.

 

[ditchcrawler]

24 minutes ago, Sea Dog said:

I reckon you could pay an awful lot more than that for one of those great big ones with the 3 legs.

 

At least with 3 legs it wont rock about

[Sea Dog]

5 minutes ago, ditchcrawler said:

At least with 3 legs it wont rock about

Good point - you could cover it in green baize and play snooker on it! Heckuva selling point for a boat. 

[aracer]

4 hours ago, ditchcrawler said:

At least with 3 legs it wont rock about

That's a shame - I like piano rock

9 hours ago, Arthur Marshall said:

Can't play crosswise - only a small boat and no functioning settee, the only seating is at the back.

40ft and normal width? As I mentioned, I can play crosswise standing up (I tend to practice sitting down on the bote due to space constraints, but would normally stand up to play). Is there other stuff in the way?

[doratheexplorer]

21 hours ago, rusty69 said:

If it is a gap of 94 cm, you could use it to keep your dinghy:

 

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/New-Dora-the-Explorer-Inflatable-Dinghy-Boat-94cm/121375463256?epid=1031998757&hash=item1c428a9758:g:y-gAAOSwFL9TsWJR

 

 

 

I claim my prize as "Idiot of the month"

Where did you get that picture of my narrowboat?

 

[Arthur Marshall]

10 hours ago, aracer said:

That's a shame - I like piano rock

40ft and normal width? As I mentioned, I can play crosswise standing up (I tend to practice sitting down on the bote due to space constraints, but would normally stand up to play). Is there other stuff in the way? 

 One end of the cabin is mostly bookshelves and bed and while the latter does fold up I rarely bother. The other end is hifi and fire, so I play sitting in the chair with the slide passing the fire. It's an odd designed boat, 40ft long but with only a 23 foot cabin. At one stage I considered shifting everything round but you'd have to move the windows and, as it's usually just me on it, it didn't seem worth the bother.