TheBiscuits

We would have to come up with a "greenwash" marketing strategy first though. Maybe we could pretend that putting them on top of coal fired stoves was in some way eco-friendly.

It's a shame nobody makes a type of fan that spins faster the hotter it gets ...

Things I consider a boat. Canoes, rafts and catamarans count, floating a mop bucket and pretending it's a boat does not. One hah hah, two hah hah ... Yes, and yes. Yes thanks. The boat has to move with the specific duck noodles on board. There is no specific mileage requirement, but I would consider just going from your mooring to the service jetty 20 yards away would not be in the spirit of the game. I hope so - the easiest handover point is going to be at the end of the BCN marathon challenge, which by definition is going round in circles for 24 hours. Me too, that's why I haven't said how much per boat I will donate!

"The bridge has been safely lowered and the deck is now lying flat across the canal on the abutments." Sounds like it did fail open to me. The quick fix was to lower it back down so it can't fall down.

I'm willing to carry them for a bit, but it would seem pointless to pass them on to another boat afterwards!

Yes, but it only encourages the pundits ... How is Graham?

Don't measure it too often

That's some bright work right there More scrolls and less castles I say ...

I know, but it was far too good a feeder line to ignore!

We don't call her Socks on this side ...

That'll be why you use a bin full of concrete instead of an actual anchor. Mind you the anchor looks like a Danforth knockoff, so the bin might bite your bottom better.

The brass ones are only adding to the cost, as the cheap plastic ones from the pound shop are slightly quicker release mechanisms. Deploy anchor ... and released!

So are you suggesting we Komplain (k) when(=) the A***hole eejits (Ae) remove the Environment Agency (-Ea) and the River Trust goes under (1/RT)?

Sad yes, but bad business savvy. Last year on the Caldon we saw lots of Andersen boats, but only one Claymore boat. At least some of it is down to how you manage customer expectations - suggesting an alternate route rather than telling people they can't have their holiday they wanted. All the Andersen boaters we spoke to said they had never heard of the Caldon until it was suggested to them as a nice canal they could do instead of the Cheshire Ring, and they all enjoyed it. They were all in the Black Lion at Consall Forge though. When the Rochdale and the Calder & Hebble flooded and breached a few years ago all the Shire Cruisers boats were craned out at Sowerby Bridge and moved to other canals and boatyards, which must have cost a pretty penny in both transport and agreements with other hire bases, but kept the boats in operation during the extended stoppages.

I did my high school work experience with the TV detector vans, they worked well back then. Favourite story in the office was a visit to a house where a woman was just dashing out on the school run, and told the chap in the van "Sorry I'm running late, but my husband will be back in half an hour, and our TV licence is in the top left hand drawer in the desk in the lounge." TV bloke goes back 40 minutes later. TV bloke: "Hello, TV licencing, I believe your licence is in the top left hand drawer in the desk in your lounge, may I see it please?" Husband: "F***ing Hell! I didn't know your vans were that accurate!"

No, the problem with that lock was the drunken eejits trying and failing to cross the head gates (which are in a direct line from one path to another) instead of walking to the curvy bridge 80 feet away. It's a shallow lock (boat deep). Jump across the roof of the boat if you don't think you have time to go round the head gates.

Thanks for the clarification Nigel. I knew they didn't report them, but not that didn't bother with them!

Technically it's a breach of the bylaws, and carries a criminal conviction and a £100 fine. It's not something CRT report the way they do Section 8 court cases and seizures.

Or indeed marker pens and a bit of paper and stick them in a window. There is a requirement to display the number, not the official plates or stickers.

If you have never vacuumed before, it's no wonder you need a new carpet!

Looks like a roll-flat hosepipe to me, just next to the anchor. Unless the hozelock couplings are a new method of attaching the rode ...

Until we can't buy red diesel anymore and then you'll be paying £1.50 per litre for diesel ...

Consider a tarp or a rubber sheet to cover the entire deck. Easy to remove when you need to get to the engine bay, and stops water flooding your deck.