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Just nudging over 40 years afloat and most of these Years as a live aboard . I have to admit that Winter is my favourite time to be aboard , there is just something special about sitting with a Good Book or perhaps listening to a good Drama on Radio 4 with the Fire ablaze and the Jack Russel stretched out on the Sofa . I especially love those occasions when I catch a Traffic Report and its chaos on the M25 or some obscure Road " oop North " , what would these People give to be in our position as they sit with gritted teeth in some Traffic Jam . Anyway I can here the Kettle whistling and Graham has just turned up with a Marks and Spencer Madeira Cake which is my hint to make the Tea . I dont think you can spend a better afternoon than on a Boat ?

I’m not sure but I feel sorry for the poodle.

I think your preconceived idea is quite common. Usually when a newspaper does an article about narrowboating, they find a couple of young artists living on a boat in London/Bradford-on-Avon/Oxford/Hebden Bridge and take pictures inside their wacky boat. Then there's George Clark who makes tv programmes about the same couples doing up their boats. Those sorts of people do exist - especially in the places listed above. But across the rest of the country, the typical boat owner is harder to pin down. The most common sort you see (in my opinion) is this: A retired couple in their late 60s to early 70s. The don't live on the boat but go to it regularly, either to fettle about with it on its mooring, or to actually cruise on it. He looks similar to Harold Shipman and she looks like a cheerful but slightly long suffering sort and has 'practical' hair. They also like steam trains and folk music. But the most common type of boat owner is in fact invisible. Nobody knows what they look like. Their boats are in marinas and boatyards all over the country, never visited, and slowly rotting away.

What IS that black Labrador doing?

Hello! Just a quick post to introduce myself and say hello. I have been lurking for a while, reading a number of threads. I’ve just had an offer on a narrowboat accepted, subject to survey, which will hopefully be arranged in the coming weeks. I’m fairly new to narrowboats, though my grandad had a few and a cruiser. I’ll be living aboard while studying at University so I’ll likely have lots of questions (apologies in advance). The boat is 60ft with two cabins, I plan on turning the back one into a study and rearranging the corridor bathroom into a walk through. Used to small spaces as I spent 12 months in my 1971 VW bus so 60ft feels like a mansion! Looking forward to chatting with you all soon.

The winds of change in the willows The mole pushed his head out of his hole, blinked in the sun and peered around his meadow. Gosh!, that sun was hot for the time of year, thought mole, looks like being the hottest day in March since records began. Newsflash. Sorry, but we interrupt this post for this announcement from the White House…… President Trump has just announced that the scientists at Fox News have just discovered that we have been measuring temperature ‘bigley wrong’ for years. They say that the temperature is really10 degrees cooler than some so called experts and scientists have been claiming and Trump has said that from now on ‘ damned hot’ will be known as ‘quite mild’ and wildfires in California are caused by ‘hippie environmentalists smoking dope’ Trump goes on to say that he will be scrapping ‘all that climate change bullshit planning and emissions crap as well as taking the US out of the Paris climate agreement Back to the riverbank. The rat was nearby, cooling off in the shade of a tree. ‘Hullo’, said mole, ‘Haven’t seen you for a while’, ‘I’ve moved’. said Ratty,’ I’m living in a shopping trolley on the Slough arm of the Grand Union canal, couldn’t afford the rent at Cookham. Got evicted. Had to sell the boat. Couldn’t afford the mooring fees any more’. ‘That’s terrible’ said Mole. ‘It gets worse’, said the rat, ‘Remember the wild wood?’ ‘Where badger used to live before he was culled?’ ‘Well now its a Persimmon housing estate’. Oh dear, said Mole, ‘whatever happened to all the animals?’. ‘Oh them’ said the rat, ‘They fled to the hundred acre wood but Tigger and Eeyore and all those animals built a big wall around it and kept them out, said they were economic migrants, much good it did them anyway. Turns out the wood was owned by Toad. He grubbed up the whole lot. Its an Amazon warehouse now’. ‘Toad!’ Said mole, ‘After all we did for him!’ ‘Yeah well, won’t make that mistake again’ said rat. ‘Never see him now anyway. Lives in a big penthouse in Canary Wharf, smokes cigars, drinks champagne with all his city friends, can’t stand the sight of him now’. ‘Haven’t you got a seafaring cousin’? Asked Mole, Can’t you stay with him instead of living in that horrid canal? ‘Yeah’, said Rat, ‘He’s retired, lives in Marseilles, can’t live with him though. They’ve banned freedom of movement’. Mole sighed and went back underground. The Rat shuffled off staring at the ground hoping to find a few pence for some white lightning cider or maybe scoring some crack from the weasels.

Hey.I bat for both sides. No no no, that came out all wrong! damn,damn,damn.

Well such as life really - language evolves continuously, whether we like it of not. I don't much like americanisms but as the internet has become an integral part of our lives so americanisms have spread, me acting like a big baby every time someone who's not American says gotten is hardly going to make much difference. If I put TBH and TBF into the forum search tool it brings up 115 pages of posts contains just those two "bastardisations", so considering just how often forum members abbreviate sentences with "internet slang" and you've never batted an eye at it before it seems very strange that you are putting so much effort in to being outraged by it now.

I know you were mostly sorta joking but for anybody who finds themselves in that position again and doesn't realise that when you are Reading a post that has a very long quote in it you can collapse the quote. To the very left of the black bar of the quote is a white circle with an arrow in it, just tap or click the circle and it will collapse the quote to just the size of the black bar. Handy to know if you are scrolling though a thread with lots of graphics.

The request was 4 years ago, so I'd guess the enquirer either found someone or gave up on the idea.

Folk keep berating such boat owners, but they're (mostly at least) paying their CRT licence. Would you rather: a. They all brought their boats out more to clog up the waterways; or, b.They didn't exist and the rest of us pay CRT more?

Thames Tideway boating this evening ?

Open plan, bedsit style for short boats, even the lavatory can be included in the open plan with decent curtains at the windows, stove in the middle of course. The Porta-Pottie can even be brought in front of the stove for a warm and comfy ''sit on'' whilst watching the telly.

Just a nice slow lickle twicle charge for 12 hrs or so before putting them into service is what I do. I have that Halfords battery in my boat, 3 years old now and only down to about 2 turds of its capacity.

air filter is clean and clear.... must be the compression, which is strange as it spins much faster if i use the decompression lever.. just dont understand how it was running great when last switched off and now nothing... all valves etc are opening and shutting... think it might have to go into the workshops to be fixed as im totally lost.. just hope it isnt a new engine job....

Well there was at least one lady amongst them when I went through, but they behaved like gentlemen even when I tried to educate them about drinking proper beer and gave them a bottle.

We've sold our boat, as family commitments have changed. That lovely picture at the top of this thread reminds me of the magic we're missing. Me and some chums, 2 yrs ago, went through the night on the GU and oxford, at the end of january - it was an unforgettable experience illuminated by torchlight. Slightly marred by freezing rain all the way, but we had lovely steak, baked potatoes and plenty of warming spirit. I don't have photos because it was raining so much unfortunately and the daylight ones seem to show a group of old vagrants which bear no relation to our memories.

Don't forget to fit the sink and drainer so that they empty at any normal trim.

"That's buggered it", said Mole. "You're as blind as a bat, Rat, you pratt!"

Has he had a recent perm? If so I guess it could be him...

That's a shame but easily fixed. Have you tried putting some diesel in say, a plant sprayer and misting some of the soft furnishings?

I think @Stilllearning is thinking of his time in a WW2 submarine. My engine is inboard and I have no diesel smell either: it's diesel fuel that smells, not diesel engines - if there's a fuel smell, there's probably a fuel leak.

A baby sardine Saw her first submarine: She was scared and watched through a peephole. "Oh come, come, come," Said the sardine's mum. "It's only a tin full of people."

I have a cruiser stern boat. No diesel smell in the cabin at all.

I'll tell of the Battle of Hastings, As happened in days long gone by, When Duke William became King of England, And 'Arold got shot in the eye. It were this way - one day in October The Duke, who were always a toff, Having no battles on at the moment, Had given his lads a day off. They'd all taken boats to go fishing, When some chap t'Conqueror's ear Said 'Let's go and put breeze up the Saxons;' Said Bill - 'By gum, that's an idea. Then turning around to his soldiers, He lifted his big Norman voice, Shouting - 'Hands up who's coming to England.' That was swank 'cos they hadn't no choice. They started away about tea-time - The sea was so calm and so still, And at quarter to ten the next morning They landed at place called Bexhill. King 'Arold came up as they landed - His face full of venom and 'ate - He said 'If you've come for t'Regatta You've got here just six weeks too late.' At this William rose, cool but 'aughty, And said - 'Give us none of your cheek; You'd best have your throne re-upholstered, I'll be wanting to use it next week.' When 'Arold heard this 'ere defiance' With rage he turned purple and blue, And shouted some rude words in Saxon, To which William answered -'And you.' 'Twere a beautiful day for a battle; The Normans set off with a will, And when both sides was duly assembled, They tossed for the top of the hill. King 'Arold he won the advantage, On the hill-top he took up his stand, With his knaves and his cads all around him, On his 'orse with his 'awk in his 'and. The Normans had nowt in their favour, Their chance of a victory seemed small, For the slope of the field were against them, And the wind in their faces and all. The kick-off were sharp at two-thirty, And soon as the whistle had went Both sides started banging each other Till the swineherds could hear them in Kent. The Saxons had best line of forwards, Well armed with both buckler and sword - But the Normans had best combination, And when half-time came no-one had scored. So the Duke called his cohorts together And said - 'Let's pretend that we're beat, Once we get Saxons on t'level We'll cut off their means of retreat.' So they ran - and the Saxons ran after, Just exactly as William had planned, Leaving 'Arold alone on the hill top On his 'orse with his 'awk in his 'and. When the Conqueror saw what had happened, A bow and an arrow he drew; He went right up to 'Arold and shot him. He were off-side, but what could they do? The Normans turned round in a fury, And gave back both parry and thrust, Till t'fightin' were all over bar shouting, And you couldn't see Saxons for dust. And after the battle were over They found 'Arold so stately and grand, Sitting there with an eye full of arrow On his 'orse with his 'awk in his 'and.

By 'downstream' if you mean from Manchester to Ellesmere Port then there's no real need to use the ropes through the locks. They only drop about 15ft and there is virtually no turbulence. We had the lock to our self so at sized 600ft by 80ft there was plenty of room for us to just float about freely. It may be different if you are sharing with a large vessel. The OP of this thread recommended using them when ascending though because there is a lot of turbulence. I think 15m length should be fine.

I don't think they did, if they had called it the M6 (MVI) that would have been 1006

Last time I reported on the forum finances was at the end of 2018 when we had £870.16 in the bank. This report covers the whole of 2019. At the beginning of the year we had £870.16 in the bank. At the end of December we had £959.67 in the bank. During the year we received nearly £1250 in donations. The monthly average was a little over £104 and the best month (January) we received £183.11 while the worst month (Oct) we received £40.42. In 2018 donations were £1857. We spent a little more than £1140 on running the site, at an average cost of £95/month. In 2018 our costs were £2006. The reduction is due to a good deal of work by Rich our Tech Admin to reduce our costs whilst maintaining a reliable site and good service levels. For those who like pictures: Our Main expenses are: Forum Software: Invision £65.00 6 Monthly Hosting: Digital Ocean £83.00 Monthly Licences Digivity/Panellicense £5-00 Monthly Controls: Cleverbridge AG £5.00 Monthly E-mail relay: SendGrid £12.00 Monthly The costs above are not exact, as some are paid in US Dollars and fluctuate as the currency exchange rate varies. Thank to everyone who supported the forum. For those who are thinking of donating regularly, an aggregated annual or 6 monthly sum is most effective- PayPal charge us a fee for collecting each donation and this is a greater percentage of a small sum than a larger one. As an example from 12 x £1.00 donations we get £10.80. From an annual donation of £12.00 we would get £11.35- an extra 5%. Thank you again for your support and Happy Boating in 2020. Regards Nigel

anything that shakes up those continuous cruisers moorers has to be a good thing.

Brought a 44' yacht up the Thames tideway to South Dock at night about 10 years ago. Got the tide wrong and wound up outside lock several hours early. Couldn't find the holding pontoon ( later found out it had been swept away) . Spent 2-3 hours jinking around just below Limehouse. To start with it was magical, By the end I was tired, cold and bored.

This is the sort of low level rudeness that ought to be stamped out in my opinion. Leaving it up just encourages others to take it further.

'Tis a terrible shame the nastiness posted in this thread is once again tolerated on the forum by Team Mod. The number of active posters seems to be reducing daily and I know LOTS of boaters in real life who have stopped posting on here as a result of bad manners and intolerance on the part of a tiny minority here. But they drive away the nicer type of boater this forum really needs to come back. Just my opinion.

Nope, I was single until the ripe old age of 35 and have now been married for 25 years. When I was single, i was just that, single. (Self partnered sounds like a weird form of masturbation IMHO). Should i find myself without a husband at anytime I will be, once again SINGLE.

Yet here you are on social media....

I have to disagree with your Tracer/ep-ever comment, I have had solar since 2009, and Tracers since 2011, and have fitted many to other boats. They really do perform well, in many light conditions, and are a robust and well designed unit built from virtually all the same components that the Outbacks are made from(in the same factory). I also wire mine, and most installations in series, or series parallel depending on the number of panels. All modern panels have diodes to prevent shade compromising other cells and panels. Doing this makes the most of the MPPT function. I started off by tilting panels, now mine are flat. The comment about a fuse or switch for the panels, especially for a large array, is good.

Would it help if I drove to you tomorrow A.M. FOC and tried to help? I will need to know if you have a jump lead or a pair of them aboard. Ring 01189874285 today if you want to accept.

The balloon modelling judges didn't even look at Dyad and my minimalistic creation: "Snake And Slow-Worn Bartop Pas De Deux" Most disappointing.