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I have this vision of family Smelly sitting round the dining table of a Sunday afternoon with Daddy Smelly reading aloud from the book of the Forum whilst Mummy Smelly looks on lovingly and pours him the occasional glass of something nice. Baby Smelly, Toddler Smelly, Child Smelly, Teen Smelly and Yoof Smelly are all listening avidly (sitting around the table in order of height, of course) whilst sipping their warm milk. Suddenly Daddy Smelly comes across a NAUGHTY WORD but too late, he’s read it out loud. The family Smelly are plunged into crisis, they spend the rest of the day wracked with sobbing and vow never to go boating again. Hmmmm, somehow I think the real world isn’t quite like that.

They? Some of them are us. It's a great shame that some others of them aren't allowed to be us too. When they are, I might even earn a star of righteous giving.

The spare cassettes were stacked on deck (although I did spot a large tank in a container frame)

We have returned safely to Hull. For some reason I'm still unable to post any final photos (max 1.8mb); perhaps I've used up my quota! Anyway, just to conclude, this has been an unforgettable experience. If the idea appeals to you then I would not hesitate in recommending this particular voyage as it was a good mixture of sailing with excellent views and interesting passages. With the boat being smaller than many container ships there is a crew of just 8 (plus, on mine, there was cadet on placement but not part of the regular crew), so you really get to know them. There is also a maximum of 4 passengers on this voyage (2 x double cabins) and there is a good chance that, like me, you are the only one which makes it even more individual. I think I've pretty much covered everything but if anyone wants any more information please feel free to PM me, and please do let me know if you decide to go (I know one or two members were tempted.. just do it if you can!).

Anyway I think the Equalties Act should be revised to include discrimination on grounds of forum membership. Only the other day I went into a baker’s to order a cake with a picture of a boat on it and a slogan saying “Support Thunderboat” but having initially accepted the order, it was later refused. It transpired that the owner of the bakers was a member of this forum.

Charming

It's a no Winn situation

But if you don't get on with your greyhound you can't run away from it.

To throw in another boaty idea where you won't have locks and therefore will probably beat the 2 adult thing - how's about the Norfolk Broads? It gets busy, but June is outside of the UK peak holiday time. Really beautiful, a real mix of places to visit and the gentle rivers and broads (lakes) are not a demanding place to go boating (except for a couple of easily avoided more tricky tidal bits if you don't fancy that). Lots of hire boat choice too. Just an alternative to consider - have a fab holiday wherever you go

Apart from the Swearing ,have heard that a few of them meet up for Armpit Farting competitions , Real outrageous stuff!

Very nicely typed Nick. Now nip over to yer other ego and do some swearing with the lads ?

Yes. Oh dear, family Smelly is once again plunged into crisis because someone just made a post with a TYPO! How utterly ghastly.

As a member of both forums..though tbh I don't visit here very much, the 'purge' disturbed me and I did not feel at ease here anymore, I would just like to add that 'over there' is far more relaxed. There are times when the language becomes to offensive for me but I then withdraw having posted my feelings on the matter. As to tech stuff..if a qu is raised it is answered though it may wander off topic. I think, if here feels it needs to be moderated to continue within its boundaries then thats ok.. Over there works being unmoderated as fellow members will squash anything too outrageous. Each to their own... Martin used to post lots and he could be quite offensive then he left and over here his language is 'moderated'.. Anyway I hope the 2 new moderators enjoy their role...it is lovely that people are willing to volunteer for these tasks..

its about moderating, not modulating

Having seen you today it appears yeo still has an infernal combustion device. So the problem round flights or dense packed locks is largly solved . Take prince down / up moor up walk back repeat with yeo. when on cross straps put rudder strings on to keep straight one to each anser pin. remove oll chimneys cans and stuff. The butty will end up in the trees at some point.. we found a foot on the relevant cross strap helps tighten the turn on a tight bend. we also spent time making cross straps that fit early on helps rather than trying to put ropes on dolly each time. If the cross straps are the same length every time the handling will be predictable. keep a shaft on the fore end of each boat. Since selling the butty we have hardly used what was in the past a vital tool, getting the motor in the centre of the channel before engaging forward when coming off the bank is vital, with the butty dragging getting the bow off can be hard enjoy.

Thanks for posting - it has been a really enjoyable read. Glad to hear that you are back safe and well in Hull.

What a terrific post Rog

Thank you very much for a most interesting topic.

But if there were to be any damp in the future... For the little effort and expense required I’d say do it. Thinned spirit varnish wouldn’t take more than five minutes per sheet and a little tin would probably do them all.

I considered starting a bonfire with it... make a little tripod with it sat on top and have a little tea light below... see what happens

If that rule has been rescinded can I have my warning points nullified? Phil

Well yes, that was my first thought But I keep getting all these emails...

Stop going onto the Viagra websites, you can (allegedly) get it direct on the NHS

Good to hear that Dot's advice was right. Moral of the story: always listen to your boatbuilder's Mum!

My advice would be to use canal furniture such as lock mouths and bridge holes as much as you can to hold the boats where you want them. Always run the fore end right up to lock gates which should keep the stern in deep water, and do not let the fore end of PRINCE go too near to the cabins of pleasure boats as at best you will scratch their paint and at worst go through their windows. Put the stem fender of both boats on the foredeck as this will prevent the high fore ends catching on lock gates and handrails. Once you have a butty on try not to stop when other boaters do unpredictable things ahead of you - go steady but keep going and just thread your way through. If the stern of the un-steered butty keeps going under the trees or toward the towpath then ease off the power a little as the water behind is going faster than you are where the canal is shallow (your speed will also increase). Always tie up with the butty on the inside, this will keep the motor in the deep water and make picking up the cross straps easier when you pull away as the motor pushes the butty into the bank as it moves forward. Do not run around as self preservation is essential, and running around looks so unprofessional. If it is frosty turn the planks over before walking down them, although you have half cabins if I remember correctly. Watch the chimneys on that great big motor as I am sure they will be higher than you are used to, and make sure the cross straps are tight - i.e. the fore end of YEO should be touching the stern fenders of PRINCE. and I could go on and on and on edit = I would strongly advise you have somebody teach you a bit about boating with pairs.

Aaaarrrghhhhhhh. There be pirates here!

I must take pictures of my bent Lister rod collection

The first boat I drove was electric

I find it depends on whether you can get off the motor pulled up to the gates, if you can then I take the pair up to the gate. When the lock is ready take the motor in dropping the cross straps to leave the butty in the lock mouth. Take the motor through and leave it attached to what ever is available, bollard or lock gate, and lock the butty through. Real pain I would think if you are single handing is closing the gate as you bring the butty out.